The Only Exception
by strawberrymacchiato
Summary: Rachel Berry's life at McKinley High couldn't get any worse. She's the token geek with no friends, and is constantly bullied by the cheerleading squad. But just when all hope seems lost, things take on a very unexpected twist indeed. Faberry.
1. Chapter 1: Prey

Rachel just stood there and felt the icy cold sensation sweep down her neck.

It was a day just like any other at McKinley high. Through her slushie soaked eyes she could see kids smiling, walking down the corridor. There was Puck, being an idiot with Finn as usual. And Artie scooting along in his wheelchair, giggling about something with Tina who walked beside him. Kurt had his hands clasped over Blaine's eyes, calling out guess who. Everyone else was happy, and they were right in front of her. How could it be that she went to the same high school as these kids and yet felt worlds apart?

''Up here, manhands.''

She forced herself to look back up into her eyes. The bully who had been doing this to her for the past few months of her life. Her hazel eyes shone with some sort of sick triumph, like a predator who had captured it's prey. That's what Quinn Fabray, head cheerleader of the Cheerios made you feel like. Prey.

''Quit staring at Finn. He'd never go for a loser like you.''

The two cheerleaders on either side of her snickered. Her words cut straight through her and she felt like her head was on fire. She clutched even tighter to the books she held to her chest and buried her face in them. All the sounds around her seemed to be drowned out. Maybe, just maybe, if she held on a little longer this time Quinn would stop. Forget about her and go pick on somebody else.

But instead, Quinn stepped closer, narrowing the gap between them. She cupped her chin, directing her gaze towards her face.

''He's with me, Berry. He loves me. Don't you see that? There's a reason that all the guys at this school won't date you. And you know what that is? It's because you're a geek. A geek who dresses like she just stepped out of some trashy 50's musical, and spends her free time composing original compositions for that pathetic excuse for a club. Face it, RuPaul. You don't belong here.''

And she finally stepped away, a smirk plastered on her face. Clearly, she was pleased with her efforts.

Rachel couldn't fight the tears that cascaded down her cheeks, and felt the warmth mingle with the cold stream of slushie that was still dripping. Quinn was right. No matter how hard Rachel had tried to make friends with anyone, she had always been shot down. Picked on for being too nerdy. Down right ignored for being too competitive. But now, now she had come to a new realisation about herself. No one would ever even like her. She stammered before she spoke the words, knowing that they would be her last before she'd run off to hide.

''Wh-Why are you being so mean to me?''

Quinn scoffed at her and exchanged bewlidered looks with Santana and Brittany, as if the answer was the most obvious thing in the world.

''Because you deserve it.''

The coldness of the words echoed throughout her brain and the world seemed to still. For a moment it was just her and Quinn, in a make-believe bubble that floated in the air. It was that moment of numbness that you feel right after someone's hurt you. You're not quite sure if it actually happened. So you keep trying to convince yourself it didn't. But all too soon, the bubble popped and Rachel felt the pain. She didn't know how, but her legs were moving. She was running, not looking where she was going. It didn't really matter did it? All she could hear was those words over and over again. You deserve it.

She pushed the door in front of her open, and staggered through as she tried to stop herself from sobbing uncontrollably. Unsurprisingly, she had wound up at the bathroom yet again. It had sort of become her haven over the past few months. Everytime Quinn would bully her she would come here and hide, and it was almost like she was hiding away all the pain. She would walk out each time with a smile on her face, and pretend that everything was alright. The smile that everyone associated with Rachel Berry, that annoying overachiever who wanted to volunteer herself for every single glee performance. The geek who got slushied by Quinn and almost every single jock on the football team. The loser with the two gay dads.

She stared into the mirror and wiped the tears from her face.

''You...are Rachel Barbra Berry. You are an-an amazing singer...you...'' But she couldn't go on, and surrendered herself to her tears as she slumped over the sink.

She didn't hear the door open behind her, much less the sounds of someone entering the bathroom.

''Berry, I should have known it was you from the disgustingly loud sobs that seem to be riccocheting down every nook and cranny of this school. Why they allowed a wimp like you into a choir will never cease to amaze me. Get out of here, you're polluting my ears.''

Rachel turned around to see Sue Sylvester staring at her with her arms crossed. If it was one thing that woman meant it was business. And she certainly didn't beat around the bush in telling you what that business was.

''Coach Sylvester I-''

''Out Berry, I haven't got time to hear your life story.''

Rachel turned around and stepped past Sylvester without even looking up at her. Her head was a mess as she reached her locker, and absentmindedly reached for her bag. There was one more period to go before the day was over. But after what had just happened, there was no way she would be attending a Spanish revision class. She threw her bag over her shoulder and exited the building, oblivious to the fact Quinn Fabray was watching her.


	2. Chapter 2: Rachel's Dream

Rachel walked home, knowing that it would cause too much of an inconvenience to call one of her dads to come and pick her up. It had started to rain, but she couldn't see the point in running. She was already drenched. The rain had probably even seeped through her bag and destroyed all her perfectly recorded notes from class. Just great. Just when she had entered her street, there was a slight humming noise behind her, and she stopped to turn around and see who it was.

''Hello?''

But it was just a car, waiting on the side of the street. The lights were switched on and the windshield wipers were swishing back and forth. It was impossible to see who it was.  
Rachel felt a shiver course through her body and quickly rushed to her front doorstep, fumbling with her keys. When the door finally opened she cast her bag to the floor and headed for the washroom. God knows how many times she had washed this argyle sweater before. It was her absolute favourite. And for some reason, it's always your favourite clothing that ends up getting dirty the most.  
So she turned the switch on the washing machine and it began to buzz.

She made her way to the shower, not noticing how quickly night had fallen. When the warm stream of water met her skin she sighed into it, breathing relief that the day was finally over. But then she heard that voice echoing in her mind again. The voice of Quinn Fabray.

You deserve it.

It was amazing how just three words could do so much damage. Her tears were renewed again, and she fought against herself to quash the memory.

''Rach, are you home honey?''

It was Leroy, and he was unusually late from work. She realised that she must have spent hours just standing there, so she quickly jumped out and dried herself off.

''Rach?''

''Hi Dad. How was your day?''

''Great. And I hope yours was too, because I have something for you that'll make it even better.''

Rachel looked up at him with wonder. She doubted that anything could pull her out of this rut. Before she knew it he was handing her a ticket to her favourite broadway musical, Funny Girl. She tried to smile but all that came out was a frown.

''Sweetie, what's wrong? I thought you'd be happy. I only have two though-your father said he won't be able to make it on that night.''

He looked down at her more closely and noticed the puffiness around her eyes.

''You haven't been crying, have you Rach?''

She looked up at him one last time and ran up the stairs to her room, where she locked the door and submerged herself beneath the covers.  
The ticket to Funny Girl was scrunched up in her hand. She would never go and see it. Musicals were for geeks.

''Rachel? Rachel Barbra Berry, open the door right now!''

She closed her eyes and covered her face with her pillow.

''Rachel. Talk to me.''

The tone had become pleading, but she wasn't going to budge.

''Rachel, I'll break down this door if I have to.''

Now she was getting scared. He wouldn't really, would he? Wait-that wasn't her father's voice, it was-

''That's it. I'm coming in.''

Rachel tensed as she heard the door bang open and the sound of footsteps approaching her. She didn't dare to peek up from her pillow.  
There was a flop on the side of her bed, and she knew that someone was watching her. She was watching her.

''Come on, even I'm not that much of a drama queen, Rach.''

And she shivered, because that voice unmistakably belonged to Quinn Fabray. How on earth did she get inside her house? Heck, how did she even know where she lived?

The next second she felt the pillow gently being moved from her face, but she kept her eyes shut.

''You've been crying, haven't you?''

She said as she pulled her into an embrace.

''It's gonna be ok. You know that? Whatever it is, you can tell me. I'm right here.''

And for some reason, the sound of Quinn's voice was like the perfect antidote to all the hurt. She eased into her arms and gripped tighter, not wanting to let go.

''Q-Quinn?''

She asked. But there was no reply. She called out again and again, surprising even herself by how loud her voice was.

''Rachel, are you alright?''

The sound of Hiram's voice came through the door.

''Daddy?''

''Thank goodness you're alive. When your dad told me what had happened last night he had me a little worried, sunshine. Now you better get ready, it's almost time for school. We can talk about it all in the car, ok?''

''Ok.''

And Hiram left from the doorway, leaving Rachel to herself once again.

She was in a daze. Somehow, she had fallen asleep crying and dreamt of...Rachel pushed away at the thought. It was madness. She quickly scanned her collection of clothes, and tried to pick out something a little bit less geeky. Normally when you go to school you pick out stuff that will get people to notice you. To make you stand out. But Rachel knew that was something that would never work for her.

Running down the stairs, she grabbed a banana from the fruit bowl and headed out the front door towards the car. When she got in her dads were all smiles.

''Morning Rach. Got your seatbelt ready?''

She nodded.

''Alright, 3, 2, 1, lift off!''

Leroy said happily. Rachel groaned and tried to shield her face with her hands. It didn't matter that she was a geek. That she could accept. But to also have your dad do embarrassing stuff like countdowns?

''Rach,'' Hiram began, picking up on her sullen mood, ''Wanna talk about what happened last night?''

She shook her head.

''Ok kiddo, whenever you're ready. Just let us know if it's anything serious, ok?''

Rachel staired aimlessly outside of the window at the passing scenery. She was beginning to have dreams of the cheerio who made her life a living hell. Was that serious?

The car lurched to a halt, and Rachel kissed her dads goodbye. She was about to turn to go, but there was still that nagging thought at the back of her mind.

''Dad, Daddy. What does it mean if you dream about someone?''

Hiram considered the question for a moment.

''It just means you're thinking about them a lot, sweetie. Is this about a boy?''

He grinned.

''N-No, it was-um, it wasn't important anyway. Thanks for the lift.''

He looked on curiously as Rachel disappeared into the old brick building.

She arrived at her locker just in time to check her timetable. Great, first period was P.E. She wasn't looking forward to having a volleyball hurled into her face yet again. Sighing she jogged towards the gym and was about to open the double doors when she felt a smooth hand on her own.

''Step aside, Berry. You're in our way.''

It was her. She looked into her eyes with an intensity Rachel couldn't place. A second later the spell was broken, and Quinn, Brittany and Santana pushed past her.

She felt herself breathe out heavily. For some reason her heart was racing. And the person who had made her heart race was-no no no. This couldn't be. Rachel immediately brushed the thought aside and entered the gym. There was absolutely no way that she had a crush on Quinn.


	3. Chapter 3: Death-Match

"Alright you spineless bunch of acne-infested adolescents, get yourselves into teams for a game that will make you black and blue."

Sue Sylvester's voice boomed around the walls of the gym loudly.

"Coach, I don't think Berry should be allowed to play. She's dressed like an 8 year old boy going to a comicon.''

The rest of the class giggled at Santana's comment. Rachel winced. Here we go again, she thought.

''Thanks Santana, but while I agree that Berry's fashion sense is extremely lame, all of you are playing today. And if you don't find a team in 10 seconds, I'll pick for you.''

Suddenly there was a nervous shuffling that erupted from the class and everyone assigned themsleves to a group. Everyone except one person, that is.

''The rules of the game are so simple even people with the intelligence quotient of a moron can understand it, so you can count yourselves lucky. Wait, Berry what are you doing over there?''

As usual, Rachel had been left out and just stood there unsure of what to do. She heard Sylvester sigh as she walked over to where she was and ushered her into one of the groups.

''You're not really eight, are you Berry? Even eight-year olds know how to join a group.''

She was about to say something else but there was a knocking at the door. It was . Sylvester's head snapped up instantly and a frown painted her face.

''William.''

''Sue.''

Rachel swore that everytime those two met it was like a showdown. She could almost feel the hot dusty wind slapping against her face. The yellow earth below was dry, and when she looked up Sylvester and were sizing each other up. Their studded leather jackets and muddy jeans said they were tough guys. She couldn't help but gulp when Sylvester whipped out a pistol from her pocket and pointed it straight at , who had done exactly what she did.

''You're going down, margarine hair.''

A tapping broke her out of her trance.

''Um, Rachel?''

She turned to see Kurt looking at her unsurely. Did he just call her by her name?

''Y-Yes, Kurt?''

''You're up first to serve.''

Rachel stared at the colossal court before her, and reluctantly stepped towards the service line at the back of the court. Puck, Finn, Artie and Mike had stationed themselves in various positions, ready to go. Well, all she had to do was get the ball over the net. Then the boys could take care of the rest of everything.  
She took a quick look on the other side of the net and regretted it immediately. Staring back at her were livid hazel eyes. It was Quinn, flanked by Brittany and Santana. Mercedes, Blaine and Jacob-Ben Israel filled out the remaining positions on the court.

Suddenly Rachel realised that she didn't know how to serve. Or rather, had never learned how to properly hit the ball over the net. She sighed, trying to figure it out. Finn must have noticed her struggling because he had jogged over to where she was.

''Rachel, right? Do you need a hand serving? Kinda looks like you don't know what's going on.''

He smirked. Rachel faltered. Was he-was someone actually trying to help her?

Finn grabbed her hand and explained how you had to serve with the edge of your hand. That way, you could put the most power into it. She didn't notice it, but she had wound up smiling at his explanation.

''Berry!''

A cold voice shot out from over the net.

''Stop harrassing my boyfriend and serve already.''

Rachel looked up to see-if it was even possible-even more furious hazel eyes practically boring into hers. Her heart shuddered, and she swallowed.

''S-Sorry, Q-Quinn.''

Finn jogged back to his position but turned back to wink at Rachel. Everything was going to be ok.

Carefully she raised the ball up with her left hand, and after a moment, threw it up into the air and punched it hard with her right palm. It went soaring, hurtling straight over the net towards Santana.

''Block!''

Brittany shouted.

Santana intercepted the serve easily, and Blaine quickly ran up to keep it in play. The ball spun furiously in the air.

''Yours!''

Quinn emerged from behind and blasted the ball back over the net. Rachel watched in awe. She had never quite noticed how beautiful Quinn looked before. In fact she was so much in awe that she hardly noticed the ball fly straight into her face. There were voices and blurry figures rushing towards her, and slowly the world before her went totally out of focus and everything became black.

"Rachel."

Quinn's voice was the first thing she heard when she opened her eyes. So she hadn't left after all.

"Quinn, I knew you didn't leave me."

She said as she gazed earnestly into Quinn's eyes. Quinn smiled back, and leaned in closer to trace around the outer edge of her eye with her fingers.

"You took quite a hit, you know."

Almost as if on cue, Rachel grimaced and felt the throbbing radiate throughout her face.

"Want me to kiss it better?"

Quinn was smiling now, and was dangerously close. So close Rachel could feel the soft caress of her breath send gentle waves of electricity dancing across her cheeks.

Rachel's eyes shut automatically.

"Berry. Berry get off me!"

When Rachel's eyes opened for the second time she was in for a shock. Right in front of her was Santana Lopez, and they seemed to be in the sick bay.

"Gross, I can't believe you actually tried to hug me."

She said as she dusted herself off.

Oh no. It had happened again. She had dreamt of Quinn and herself in a compromising situation, except this time Santana happened to be standing around at the wrong place and at the wrong time.

"And what's up with you calling Quinn's name over and over again? Please don't tell me you were dreaming of her..."

Rachel couldn't respond, and for Santana that was good enough evidence as any. At that moment, there was a light knock at the door and both Quinn and Brittany stepped into the room and walked up besides Santana.

"Britt. Q. Boy do I have news for you. The dwarf here was fantasising about you in her dreams."

The words were like daggers to Rachel, and she desperately looked for a route of escape. There wasn't one.

Brittany looked shocked.

"You dreamt of me?"

"No B," Santana interjected, "She kept calling out for Q. Quinn, Oh Quinn!"

And they both started laughing to themselves.

Rachel's face went bright red, and she was about to immerse herself into the quilt when she realised how quiet Quinn was being.

She glanced upwards towards her and-what? This couldn't be. Quinn was...blushing? Certain she had imagined it, Rachel rubbed her eyes and stared again. This time Quinn was glaring at her angrily.

"You disgust me, Berry. This a new low even for you."

Her words were harsh, but there was a softness in her expression Rachel hadn't seen before. It was almost like she was trying to hide something. But what?

Seemingly out of nowhere the bell rang for period 2, and the three cheerios filed out of the room. Only Quinn stopped and turned around. She seemed hesitant to leave. She quickly made sure Brittany and Santana were out of earshot, and returned her attention to Rachel.

"Did you really call out my name?"

And there it was again. That softness, the questioning, the yearning in her warm eyes. It was so easy to get lost in them. Rachel felt her body grow weak, and her breath hitched.

"N-No."

Quinn's face immediately became one of disappointment.

"Later, dwarf."

She said as she stormed out of the room.

The nurse hadn't come to check on her yet and her face was still in pain from getting smacked by a volleyball. But the only thing that seemed to consume Rachel's mind was what had just happened. Being Rachel Berry, she had a tendency to overthink things. Overthink things and draw bizarre conclusions. But she was sure that there had been a change in Quinn's recent behaviour, for some unexplained reason. And she was determined to get to the bottom of it.


	4. Chapter 4: Beautiful

When Rachel walked into glee club she felt a temporary burst of happiness. This was the one true place where she could be herself, where she was immune from everybody's callous remarks and her rank in the student hierarchy didn't matter so much.

"Well well, look what the cat dragged in."

There were a few laughs around the room. Santana was leering at her from one of the seats out in front.

"Santana, that'll do."

Mr. Schue did his best to put the kids in their place, but queen-bees like Santana were difficult to restrain.

"Nice make-up, dwarf. But if you were trying to go for the Joker, you forgot the white face paint."

This time the whole class roared with laughter. Rachel felt herself shrivel up as she took her seat. Her black eye stuck out like a sore thumb and no amount of ice had managed to keep the swelling in check.

"I said that'll do."

Mr. Schue looked down at Santana firmly and went on.

"Alright, I thought today we could have a bit of an impromptu competition. I want each of you to pick a song that represents how you feel about yourself right now. I don't care about how you felt before you came into this class, and I don't care how you'll feel after. I just want you to focus on now."

Everyone looked at each other in confusion. They never quite did understand what possessed the man to come up with such vague themes.

"I feel like a flamingo, can I sing about that?"

By now, the class was used to Brittany making comments like that. So Quinn spoke up.

"Mr. Schue, I think we should change the topic. For obvious reasons."

She turned to Brittany and raised her eyebrows.

"Everyone in favour of the change, raise your hand."

Slowly the rest of the class began to lift their hands upward. Quinn smiled. She had such control over the rest of her peers as head cheerleader, and she loved it.

"See Mr. Schue, no one wants to sing about their feelings."

But he wasn't looking at her. He was looking at Rachel, who was still cowering in her seat. Her arms lay down by her sides. Mr. Schue smiled.

"Sure Quinn, you may have the majority vote here but I'd still like to hear what Rachel has to say."

Quinn frowned and turned her head to the side. Rachel noticed how annoyed she was, and she really didn't want to upset her any further. But there was something itching inside of her. Bubbling up, begging to come out. Finally, she couldn't keep it in any longer.

"I think it's a great idea. Some of the most famous songs we know today are a direct result of people pouring out their hearts into their lyrics. Just look at songs like 'No Air', or even 'Papa can you hear me'- the amount of emotion that's invested into those songs is incredible. I find this topic to be very complex because singing about how you feel requires a great deal of honesty, and being honest about your true feelings is surprisingly difficult."

For some reason, and she swore she couldn't help it, she turned to look at Quinn. She was staring right back at her, and blinked a couple of times.

"Uh, right." Mr. Schue began, "That sounds...great, Rachel. Maybe you could start us off then?"

Her eyes were still on Quinn's, and suddenly all her confidence had been drained. A flush crept over her face. She was hoping Quinn wouldn't notice.

"Geek yourself out, treasure trail."

Quinn's lips curved into a smile. In that moment, Rachel saw a flashback of yesterday when she had been picked on relentlessly in the corridor. Quinn had ridiculed her sense of fashion. Quinn had mocked her for composing her own songs. Quinn had even made her feel bad about the one true thing she loved—music.

And now, she was waiting expectantly. Rachel could tell that all Quinn wanted to see was for her to start crying and run away to the toilets like she always did. But Rachel was getting tired of being pushed around. This was one of those moments in life that change you as a person. The type where you either decide to back down, or step up to be counted. Rachel gritted her teeth and got up from her chair.

"Challenge accepted, Quinn Fabray."

The whole class seemed to draw their breath in shock. No one ever spoke back to Quinn. And especially not someone like Rachel Berry. Quinn just stared back at her, dumbfounded.

Rachel walked with a deliberate stride to the front of the classroom and looked everyone in the eye. She pushed down the voice inside her head that told her she looked like an idiot, and that nobody would like her performance. This was her element, and she was going to own it.

"The song I'm going to sing," She announced as Mr. Schue opened up the piano next to her, "Is 'Beautiful', by Christina Aguilera. Because that's how I feel inside. Beautiful."

Once again she could hear the loud snickering passing through the classroom like waves, but she ignored it.

"Ready Rachel?" Mr. Schue asked.

She nodded.

They made sure they were in the right key first, and Rachel finally let herself go. The notes flew out of her mouth like magic, and even Mr. Schue was surprised at how powerful yet serene she sounded. Not a single person could look away when Rachel sang, because it felt like she was touching their souls. The performance finally came to an end, and Rachel huffed, out of breath.

There was dead silence. Not a single person clapped. That is, until Brittany started wildly mashing her hands together. One by one, everyone else began cheering as well.

They were cheering for her. Rachel Berry. And she couldn't believe it.

A smile washed over her face and she went to sit back down in her seat. She turned to look at Quinn, who wore some unfathomable expression on her face as she talked to Santana and Brittany. She hoped they weren't planning some scheme on how to get her back.

"That was wonderful, Rachel." Mr. Schue beamed. "See guys? Now that's what I'm talking about. Sheer emotion. If we keep this up, we're gonna blast the competition at sectionals. So, who's next?"

But just as he finished asking the question, the sound of the bell ringing permeated the room and everyone got up from their seats.

"We'll continue this next time guys. Make sure you pick a song beforehand. that's your homework for this week."

Rachel couldn't contain her happiness. She felt like she had found herself again, despite all the terrible things that had happened to her. She was about to pick up her books when she felt a hand on her shoulder. It was Finn.

"Hey. That was pretty cool. I didn't know you could sing like that Rach."

She stopped dead in her tracks. Finn Hudson was not only speaking to her, but he had just called her 'Rach'. Either she was hallucinating or having one of those strange dreams again. Yes, it had to be that. Soon, she would wake up and Santana would be slapping her face.

"Want me to carry your books to the next class?"

Rachel dared to look up at him. He didn't look like an illusion. He just looked like Finn Hudson, quarterback of the football team, boyfriend of Quinn Fabray-

Quinn Fabray.

As soon as she heard the name in her head she felt a tremor pulse through her, and glanced around nervously. Sure enough, Qunn was watching them suspiciously from the distance. Rachel gulped.

"U-Um, no, thank you Finn, I'll be just fine." She tried.

But Finn just took them anyway. Walking side by side with him, she felt some kind of protection against Quinn. But she knew it wouldn't last. They had reached the classroom, and their Geometry lesson was about to begin.

"Where do you sit?" He asked sweetly.

"Finn."

Quinn's voice was sharp and merciless. Now Rachel had really done it.

"What are you doing talking to her?"

Finn looked up guiltily.

"I was just helping her carry her books to class, no big deal right?"

But Quinn's cold expression was unwavering.

"No big deal? You carry treasure trail's books all the way to Geometry, ignore your girfriend, and it's 'no big deal'? Do you have a crush on her or something?"

Rachel's heart sped up at the word 'crush'. Finn stammered before answering. That wasn't a good sign.

"Of course not, I was just trying to be nice."

Quinn wasn't convinced.

"Alright, Hudson. Continue being 'nice' and take her books inside. Berry's coming with me."

Both Rachel and Finn opened their mouths to protest but Quinn just slid her hand over Rachel's and pulled her away down the corridor. Her hand was warm and had the faintest trace of sweat. It fit perfectly around Rachel's own and Rachel felt how soft Quinn's skin was to the touch. She shook her head and snapped out of her reverie.

"Quinn, where are we going?"

She asked in a quivering voice.

Quinn smiled and stared fixedly into her eyes. Rachel couldn't help the fear that she felt grip her throat. This was bad. Very, very bad.

"We're going to go and make you beautiful."


	5. Chapter 5: The New Rachel

The thoughts in Rachel's head were madly speeding around. They didn't come to a stop until they reached the girls' bathroom, and Quinn held the door open for her.

"After you, Berry."

There was a voice inside Rachel's head screaming at her not to enter, but at the same time it felt like she couldn't say no. She tentatively walked forward only to be met with the sight of Brittany and Santana grinning at her. Suddenly she grew very uncomfortable.

"Got the white face paint Q. Did you get the lipstick and stuff?"

Rachel turned behind her to see Quinn nodding. She was confused.

"Wha-What are you going to do with that?"

Santana stepped closer towards her until her figure seemed to be towering over her.

"What do you think, dwarf? We're gonna do the joker justice."

Rachel's body became stiff. She literally couldn't move from fear as Brittany and Santana held her back and pulled out a powdery white brush and tried to dab it all over her face. Tears began to pour down her eyes and soft yelps escaped her lips. The confidence her performance had given her had all but disappeared. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Quinn, who just stood there transfixed by the spectacle before her. She expected her to be smirking, thrilled that Rachel was getting what she deserved for answering her back. Satisfied that she was going to be painted up as a ridiculous figure from Batman comics, so Finn would never even look at her.

But all she saw was pain. She looked broken. In a flash it was gone and Quinn spoke.

"Santana, Britt, I need you guys to go."

They stopped their assault and looked at her incredulously.

"Q, we where just getting to the best part!"

Quinn sighed in a way that spoke volumes, and walked up besides them.

"You guys are really behind in your Geometry. And she was trying to steal my boyfriend, not yours. Berry's mine."

Santana and Brittany stood there for a moment, feeling a sense of incompleteness. Quinn always got her way, especially when it came to Rachel. It was always Quinn who insisted that she slushie her, that she got to say the last word. This had always puzzled them but they had just put it down to Quinn being Quinn.

"Alright, Q. See you in class." Santana said and she led Brittany out of the bathroom.

Suddenly Rachel found herself alone in the bathroom with Quinn. She couldn't even bring herself to look at her. Her hands trembled uncontrollably and her face was damp. She had never wanted Quinn to see her like this. Normally she came here alone, so she could hide away from the harsh biting words and pretend like it never happened. But now reality had dealt her a slap in the face. She knew that Quinn would show no mercy. It was the perfect time to get back at her, and she had orchestrated this all so well. She tried to calm her breathing and clenched her eyes shut, expecting the worst.

"Are you alright? You're shaking."

Her eyes shot up to Quinn. She had somehow gradually closed the distance between them so that her body was inches from Rachel's own. Rachel stared into her eyes and was met with pity. How she wished it was genuine. Right now, she needed someone she could trust. Someone that wouldn't go all Jekyll and Hyde on her whenever the mood struck. She continued to look into Quinn's eyes, searching for answers she so desperately needed to know.

She didn't expect it, but Quinn moved in closer and slowly, delicately wrapped her arms around her. Her hands clung tightly to her back, holding her up to keep her from falling. Because if she had let her go at this moment, she probably would have fallen. She buried her face deep into Quinn's neck, feeling the heat of her body. Her hands stopped trembling and hung loosely by her sides.

"I'm sorry."

Instinctively, Rachel's arms reached upward and looped themselves around Quinn's back, tugging her closer. She knew that she must be dreaming again. The real Quinn would never apologise for being such a tyrant. But this moment felt so real. She let it all pour out. Her heart was so tormented and fractured and she needed to let it heal. The tears flowed freely into Quinn's shoulder, soaking her cheerio's uniform. But Rachel couldn't stop. She would never let go until she felt whole again.

Time passed by them as they stood melded together in the bathroom for what seemed like an eternity. When Rachel finally pulled away, Quinn grasped her arms and looked at her in the eyes beseechingly.

"I...I'm sorry... I'm so sorry."

But she wanted to say more. So much more. There is a saying that goes the eyes are the windows to the soul, and at this moment Rachel could not have agreed more. Quinn looked so fragile right now, not at all like the Quinn in her dreams. What if this was the real Quinn? What if this was a side that Rachel, or anybody else for that matter, had never seen before? Doubt played on Rachel's heart as she finally spoke up.

"Quinn..." She began, unsure of what would come out of her mouth next, "Why are you doing this?"

Quinn stared at her with that same soft expression that covered her face at the sick bay.

"Doing what?"

Rachel sighed, frustrated.

"Y-You've been making my life absolutely miserable for the last few months, without a word of apology. And a-apparently for no reason. There isn't a day that I can come to school without getting slushied. I have to wash my clothing every single day Quinn. Every single day. I go home at night crying in my bed and I can't even tell my dads why. Do you know what that feels like?"

Quinn took a step back, but Rachel wasn't finished yet.

"Do you know what it feels like to just absorb every single insult you throw my way without saying anything in return? You call the way I dress trashy. You think it's silly that I write my own songs. A-And y-you're so insecure that you can't even handle it when Finn offers to carry my books."

Oh no, she had gone too far. Rachel hadn't meant to say that, it just came out that way. She looked at Quinn expectantly, but all she did was hang her head down. She looked...ashamed? Rachel took the opportunity and went on.

"S-So you make up wicked plots with Brittany and Santana about how you're going to get me back. When really, I'm the one being bullied by you. So I'm wondering Quinn, why. Why didn't you let them just finish the job? When I sang 'beautiful' in glee club it was to make myself feel better because you keep putting me down. I-I didn't feel beautiful at all. So why didn't you let them bring me to rock bottom all over again and paint my face like the joker so I look like a laughing stock? Like the ugly laughing stock you think that I am. That's what you want, isn't it? Isn't it!? Come on Quinn, tell me-Rachel you deserve it!"

Rachel didn't realise but her voice had grown louder and louder. She was practically yelling right at Quinn and she couldn't care less. She needed an answer, a reason for why all of this had happened.

When Quinn finally lifted her face to look back up at her, Rachel gasped.

Her eyes brimmed with tears, and they looked like they were about to burst. No no no, she wouldn't fall for this trick, no matter how genuine it looked. Saying 'I'm sorry' a few times wasn't enough. It just couldn't make up for all the damage that she had done. Rachel cleared her throat.

"F-Fine, don't give me the satisfaction of knowing. You know what? I don't want to know. I don't even care. Keep all your feelings to yourself, since you think it's better not to talk about them or even sing about them. B-But I'd like to request that you stay out of my life from now on. I'm going to go to Geometry now. Goodbye, Quinn.''

For a moment, Rachel stood there waiting for a reply. There was a part of her that longed for Quinn to stop her, to pull her back into that embrace that lasted forever and just hold her. God did she need that right now. She wasn't used to answering back to people, and she was surprised at how much energy it had taken up. She felt emotionally drained.

But Quinn didn't budge. She just continued to stare at Rachel with those wounded eyes, tears silently trickling down her cheeks.

Rachel took a deep breath and turned to go. Her heart beat wildly as she placed her hand around the doorknob and twisted it to open the door. She took one step out the door and froze when she heard Quinn speak.

''Wait, Rachel.''

She felt her pulse quicken, and she raised her hand to her chest to stop it. It didn't work. Quinn Fabray, head cheerleader of the cheerios and her own personal bully for long and agonising months, had just called her by her first name. She had waited so long for this kind of validation. She had craved it. To feel accepted, to feel normal. But it was too late. And she wasn't going to back down.

Rachel walked through the door without looking back, without hearing it shut in Quinn's face as she ran towards it, and without hearing the final three words that Quinn had to tell her.


	6. Chapter 6: The Letter

There is nothing quite like the feeling you get when you face your greatest fear. Rachel never imagined that she would be demanding an explanation for Quinn's downright nasty behaviour or even having the guts to tell Quinn to leave her alone. But she had done it. She had stood up to her. A strange mix of relief and anxiety swirled around in her stomach as she reached Geometry class, and politely excused herself for being so late. She hoped no one would notice she had been crying.

Her eyes landed on Brittany and Santana first. Santana looked at her with disdain and Brittany with confusion. She knew what they were thinking.

"Rach, quick-come take a seat."

She whipped her head around to see Finn grinning at her. He motioned over to the chair next to him with his head. Santana scowled at disapprovingly, but Rachel proceeded to sit down. He had arranged her books neatly on the table before her, and opened them up to the exact page the teacher was talking about. She smiled and whispered thanks before she returned her attention to the front of the class. Ms. Bletheim really was a good teacher once you got to know her. The only thing Rachel couldn't stand was the fact that she constantly made negative references to the kids in glee club.

"And to figure out angle x, you first need to realise you're dealing with a straight line. The more mathematically inclined of us would know that a straight line equates to 180 degrees. Therefore, to determine angle x we need to subtract the angle we're given from 180. Does that make sense?"

Rachel groaned. She had alread finished the chapter and was preparing exam revision notes complete with coloured post-it notes. How could it not make sense?

"Hey, do you even know what she's talking about?"

She turned towards him, surprised. He looked completely clueless.

"Yes of course. It's quite simple really." She said quietly. She was careful not to attract the attention of Ms. Bletheim, who was now going off on some tangent about how maths students were more like triangles, whereas art kids where more like squares.

She explained it all to Finn the way it made sense in her mind. Maths was one of those truly beautiful subjects for Rachel. For her it symbolised perfection, and she found it thrilling to extract answers from seemingly unsolvable equations. That's how she usually found it. But for some reason, she couldn't seem to get that same sense of enjoyment as she explained it now.

"Wow, you make it sound so easy!" Finn smiled appreciatively. "Maybe you could tutor me sometime?"

Rachel hoped she had imagined what he had just said. But she knew she definitely hadn't imagined it when he winked at her. Somehow this all felt very wrong. Not only wrong because he was Finn-Hudson-boyfriend-of-Quinn-Fabray wrong, but because she had just had a very emotional showdown with Quinn. But what was most wrong was that he wasn't asking about Quinn.

As she was about to give her answer the bell rang, signalling the end of the period. She sighed with relief, but it was short lived. A loud thump on her desk startled her and she looked up to see Santana glaring at her.

"RuPaul. Where's Q?"

Rachel stammered for a moment, before getting a grip on herself. If she could face Quinn then she could face Santana too.

"I don't know. And frankly, I don't care."

Santana's eyes narrowed, and Rachel flinched.

"Listen Berry, I don't know what happened between you and Q in there, but I find it a little strange that she didn't show for class. She never ditches. So I'm gonna wait here until you tell me what the hell you did to her."

Finn looked at Rachel with a blank expression on his face, obviously lost for words. Rachel stood up slowly, grabbed all her books and stared Santana straight in the face.

"This could get ugly." Puck muttered quietly to Tina and Mike, who just nodded their heads.

"No you listen, Lopez." Rachel said, anger rising in her voice, "I'm not going to answer your every beck and call just because you are part of the Cheerios and treat everybody who is not on the Cheerios as inferior specimens. But I will tell you that I did absolutely nothing to her except ask her why she's been torturing me. So if you want to find out why she 'ditched', I suggest you go back to the girls' bathroom where you were going to paint me up to be the laughing stock of the class."

Santana's mouth literally dropped to the floor and Rachel couldn't help but feel anxious something terrible was about to happen. Her face flushed with heat, and she stormed out of the classroom determined not to show how she truly felt. A chorus of loud cheers echoed behind her, but she didn't dare look back.

She kept walking ahead till she reached her locker, and tried to catch her breath. In one day, Rachel had gone from Lima-loser to a girl who stood up for herself. When she looked down at her tiny hands, she felt exactly how David must have felt when he defeated Goliath. She reached out for her Spanish books and shut her locker door.

"Rach!"

The loud and booming voice of Finn Hudson followed her all the way down the corridor until he was by her side.

"Rachel," He continued breathlessly, stopping a little too close for comfort. "Wow, just wow. What you did back there, that was-that was...epic."

Rachel sighed, not only at his word choice. But also because he hadn't thought to stick up for his girlfriend. He should not be complimenting her right now. Heck, he shouldn't even be at her locker. He should be defending Quinn to the death, pulling out his sword and aiming directly for Rachel's neck and saying, "What did you do to my girl!" That's what she would do if she were him. Wait what?

"Rachel, I was wondering if you'd like to come to watch the game tonight. I'd really love it if you could cheer us on."

A voice inside Rachel's head screamed. This was just wrong on so many levels.

"Whadda ya say?"

He looked at her with sweetness in his eyes. No. She would absolutely not go. This was absolutely ridiculous and there was no way she would ever do that to Quinn, no matter how mean she had been to her.

"Finn Hudson, I appreciate the invitation you're extending but I'm afraid I simply cannot accept for a number of reasons. Firstly I-"

"So you'll come? I'm so glad."

And before she knew it she was being bear hugged. The first time she winced, it was at his lack of attention to what she had actually said. But the second time she winced was for a very different reason. It was because of the girl who was looking straight at her with the saddest eyes she had ever seen.

In the distance stood Quinn Fabray. Her usually perfect hair was in a mess, and her eyeliner had trailed down her cheeks in long black streams. She looked terrible.

Rachel pulled away instantly, dragging her eyes away from Quinn and mumbled something incoherent to Finn before sprinting off to Spanish. Her mind went numb as she sat in class, absentmindedly chewing on her pencil. When she answered questions, she did so without caring if she was wrong. Mr. Schue was genuinely surprised when Rachel incorrectly conjugated the verb 'dormir'.

"Rachel, are you alright?"

Oh, if only he knew.

"Of course." She lied, wearing her best fake smile.

When class was over she left in an utter daze, and practically collapsed on her locker as she twisted the combination lock with every last ounce of resolve she could muster. The door swung open and that was when she saw it. On top of the pile of assorted books in her locker was a white letter. A letter with her name on it.

She swallowed thickly as a myriad of scenarios played out in her head. Was this Finn Hudson declaring his undying love for her? Was it Santana challenging her to a duel on the roof of McKinley? Could it be Sue Sylvester threatening to expel her for her atrocious grades in P.E? There was only one person who did not cross her mind as she read the three words that stuck out at her from the paper before her:

"You are beautiful."


	7. Chapter 7: Touchdown

The rain outside had begun to bucket down mercilessly upon the weathered tiles of the McKinley high roof, and Rachel could see water droplets swimming down the corridor windows. All the air around her had grown stiff and cold, but her heart beat loudly and kept her warm.

''You are beautiful.''

Her eyes read and re-read the words over and over again, trying to make sure this wasn't just some mistake. She clutched the letter tightly in her hands, afraid the words would somehow disappear. But the words never danced off the page out of her reach. They sat there looking back at her. They were real.

In all her years of high school, Rachel had never received any sort of love confession from anybody. And as far as she was concerned, would never be receiving one in the forseeable future. Who in their right mind would like her anyway?  
But today that had changed. Everything had changed. From the moment she entered the gym and got a black eye, to her performance in glee club, to standing up against Quinn and Santana. And finally, to this. A sense of dread enveloped her as she came to the conclusion it must have been Finn. Yes. He had been standing with her at her locker before, and he'd somehow slipped the letter in after she ran off to Spanish.

''Hey, are you coming to watch the game? Finn said you'd be there.''

Rachel's gaze flipped over to Puck, who stood beside her wearing his red and white jersey proudly. He was Finn's best friend, and if Rachel didn't go he would definitely be the first to tell him.

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it." She said reluctantly.

"Ok then Rachel, just follow me down to the field then." He said as he fitted his helmet around his head snugly.

He swivelled on his feet and began to jog lightly down the corridor. Rachel followed, not really sure if she was making the right decision.

''By the way, you should hang around after it's all over. Finn said he had a surprise for you.''

Rachel's mind flew into a whirl of confusion. Surprise? What could that possibly mean?

''Berry.''

When Rachel turned around, Sue Sylvester was eyeing her up and down like a general inspects his troops. No, the way a general inspects the enemy's troops.

''My office, now.''

And from the serious tone in her voice, Rachel knew there would be no arguing with her. Puck just shrugged.

''I'd go if I were you. I heard she's just started menopause.''

Rachel grimaced.

''Yeah, I know.'' He said with a grin. ''Anyway, see you after the game.'' And he shuffled off out of distance.

The journey to Sylvester's office was a long one, and the air around Rachel felt heavy, almost as if she would suffocate from lack of oxygen. She entered the room hesitantly, and as she inched her way over to the chair, she noticed someone smirking at her from the corner. Santana. This couldn't be good.

''Berry, Berry, Berry. First you deliberately injure yourself just so you have an excuse to leave my class, and now this.'' She shook her head with disappointment.

Rachel was confused.

''Oh no, don't go playing the innocent card on me. I've been informed by Santana here that you've been trying to put forward a motion to get rid of the cheerios. Is that correct?''

''I-''

''Save it for the academic board, Berry. We all know how ridiculously unappreciative you Broadway wannabes are when it comes to real talent. So I've decided to show you what happens when you try to mess with Sue Sylvester. Starting tomorrow your position in glee club has been revoked. And if I ever catch you trying to undermine the cheerios again, you mark my words Berry, you will be expelled.''

Rachel felt tears well up in her eyes.

''Well I think you were on your way to watch some dumb jocks get hot and sweaty in the rain so you better get going. Wouldn't wanna miss it.'' She winked.

Rachel's legs were trembling, and she wasn't quite sure if she could stand. She knew Santana would be pleased with herself. That liar. She had done this to get back at her, and she'd hit her exactly where it would hurt the most.

''Oh I'll show her the door, coach.'' Santana added to deepen the wound.

She took Rachel by the arm and guided her outside roughly. They both stood face to face in the deserted corridor, completely silent except for the heavy rain crashing down outside. Santana finally let go of her arm and smiled.

''See Berry? This is why you don't mess with us. You hurt Q, and now you're gonna pay. Now run along to your little game and have fun.''

And she shut the door in her face.

For a moment Rachel just stood there, too stunned to react. She thought that this was part of some bad dream. Some very bad dream where anything she touched turned to soot instead of gold. But it wasn't a dream. She had just lost the one thing she cared about and loved the most. Glee club was like her beacon of light in the storm, her oasis in the desert. And now that backstabber Santana had whipped up some fabulous lie to take it away from her.

Rachel shook her head in frustration as she headed down towards the football field, wondering if it was possible that this day could get any worse.

Sometimes, it's only when you get outside that you realise how heavily the rain is falling. But Rachel didn't notice it at all. Rachel didn't even notice that her letter was getting soaked, the words becoming more unintelligible by the second. When she arrived in the stand she was a dripping wet mess, and she plonked down next to Kurt and thrust the letter into her pocket.

''Um...are you ok?''

She looked at him and saw genuine concern in his eyes. He never did seem like a mean kid. He was just under the influence of...Rachel pushed the thought out of her mind.

''Sure I am. Hey look, the game's about to start.''

Perhaps this was what Rachel needed. Some sort of distraction from the drama serial that her life had just become. But as she saw the cheerios bounce out onto the field, she knew that the drama was far from over. Especially when her eyes locked with hazel, and especially when she saw that same broken expression she had seen in the corridor earlier today. The rain spattered down onto their uniforms as they performed their routine, swirling their pom poms up and down in a way that Rachel found captivating. Well, the way one girl swirled them at least. Her impossibly long streams of golden hair swished gracefully around her slender frame as she leaped into the air. Rachel couldn't tear her eyes away as her arms swayed so effortlessly, and in perfect unison to the beat. She didn't seem bothered by the rain either. But there was a sadness in her eyes that no one else could see. No one but Rachel.

In a flash, their performance was over, and the cheerios jogged out of the rain and off the field. Rachel breathed out heavily, feeling some inexplicable tightness in her stomach. Then the sirens blared loudly and football players replaced the cheerios.

They hustled across the field with purpose. They roared commands to their teammates and they tackled the visitors and dislodged the ball from their grasp.

But Rachel didn't notice.

Mike used a rival team member's back for leverage to propel himself into the air, and he made the most spectacular catch of the game.

But Rachel didn't notice.

And when Finn scored the winning touchdown for the Titans and the audience practically broke their seats from their clapping and cheering, Rachel still didn't notice.

All she could think about was Quinn and those sad, sad eyes.

Where was she now? Rachel wasn't exactly sure why, but somehow in the midst of all her own problems, she couldn't help but feel sorry for her. She stood without thinking and began to make her way out of the stadium. She had to find her. Her heart started to beat faster and faster as she approached the girls' changing room. She was about to open the door when she heard a quiet sobbing coming from inside. It sounded pained, and that voice was so familiar.

''Quinn?''

Suddenly Rachel felt a big hand pressing on her shoulder.

''Rach, I've been looking for you everywhere.''

It was Finn. His skin looked sweaty from the game, and he radiated warmth. Rachel took a step back. She had completely forgotten about what Puck had told her.

''F-Finn, what are you doing here?''

A wide grin spread across his face.

''Aren't you gonna congratulate me?''

Rachel suddenly felt a pang of guilt.

''Oh I'm so sorry, that was extremely rude. Y-You were great Finn. Absolutely great.''

If it was possible, his grin stretched even wider. He took a step closer, but just close enough so he couldn't see the girls' changing room door.

''Rach, I really like you. I think I...I-''

At that moment, there were three things that happened all at once. Rachel froze with shock as Finn's face angled down closer and closer, the quiet creaking of a door was heard, and Finn's lips were on hers.


	8. Chapter 8: Don't Rain On My Parade

The first time you kiss someone, it's supposed to be this glorious moment where the world seems to stop and fireworks start exploding all around you.

Your heart is supposed to be drumming like a marching band, and all the rain clouds are meant to dissipate away to let the sun come out.

And that kiss should be with the one you love.

But as she stood paralysed in the grip of the kiss, the only thoughts that seemed to be zooming around Rachel's mind were those telling her how wrong this was.

She hadn't closed her eyes, and suddenly Rachel noticed strands of blonde hair and then steely hazel eyes watching her from the doorway. She jerked her face away from Finn's and turned fully to face Quinn. For a moment she just stood there with this strange emptiness in her eyes. And then she was bolting down the corridor further and further away from her.

''W-Wait!''

Rachel called and began to run after her before she felt Finn's powerful hand pull her back.

''Rach? Is everything ok? W-Who was that?''

She stared into his face with disgust.

''Finn Hudson,'' She began furiously as she removed herself from his hold, ''Everything is not ok. First of all, I do not appreciate what you just did at all. Secondly, the person who just witnessed us ki-''

Before she could finish her sentence his lips were on hers again. This time she pushed him off forcefully and stepped out of the kissing zone.

''Finn! You're impossible! I just told you that I don't want you kissing me!''

''You're cute when you're angry, Rach.''

He smiled and she sighed, desperately trying to contain her anger.

''Are you even listening to anything I say? Finn, I can't do this. Not now, not ever, because not only do I have absolutely no romantic feelings for you whatsoever, but you have a girlfriend! Did you even think about Quinn before you decided to do any of this!?''

She was mad. And she was mad because Finn had cheated on her tormenter. What on earth was wrong with her?

''We broke up, Rach. I-I thought that you liked me.''

Now he looked hurt. Oh boy was she a sucker for sympathy acts. But wait, what did he just say?

''Y-You broke up with her!? To...to be with me?''

He nodded dumbly. Rachel stood there, mouth agape. Why hadn't she picked up on all the clues? Helping her out at volleyball, carrying her books to class, and then the most obvious of them all-wanting to surprise her with something after the game. She threw her face into her hands in an attempt to calm her throbbing head. She had to leave. This day had dragged on long enough and she was going to run all the way home to get away from all this horrible, horrible mess. Unconsciously her hand flew to her pockets to retrieve her mobile phone, but she felt wet mushy paper instead. The letter.

She looked up at Finn. She needed to know.

''Finn...did you write this?'' And she held out the letter for him to see.

She watched him carefully as he squinted his eyes at the blurry letters, looking for any tiny changes in his expression that might give it away. There were none.

''I've never seen that before. Did someone give it to you?''

And that was all she needed to hear. The next second she had turned around and was running down the corridor away from the sound of Finn calling out her name, and out of the school grounds. She wasn't sure how, but her legs carried her heavy body on and on through the torrential rain. Each droplet felt like fire singeing her skin, and when she finally arrived at her doorstep she was soaked to the core.

She was about to thrust her keys into the keyhole when she heard a faint humming from behind her. It was almost completely masked by the sound of the rain. But sure enough, when she looked back there was that same car she had seen yesterday. It's windshield wipers swished back and forth in a steady motion, and it sounded like there was music coming from the inside.

"Hello? Is there anybody in there?"

At that moment the front door swung open and Hiram was facing Rachel, concern painted on his face.

"Rachel! Your dad and I have been worried sick! You didn't even answer your phone. Where in the world have you been hiding? And just look at you, you're soaked!"

Rachel's head drooped in shame. It had been one of the most unbelievable days of her young life, but it was no excuse. She had promised her dads to let them in on things more. It was just so difficult to do ever since the bullying had started. She looked up at Hiram with genuine sorrow, trying to convey how much she regretted causing them to worry like that. His face softened and he immediately yanked off her jacket.

"Rach honey, you better go have a shower before you get sick. I'd ask you what your day was like but you look absolutely exhausted."

Rachel nodded meekly. Hiram looked down at her with a serious expression as she made her way past him up the stairs.

"Have a good night sweetie. I just hope this isn't all about that Quinn girl again. We'll discuss this all tomorrow, but I want you to have a good night. Sweet dreams."

Rachel froze on the stairs, but luckily her dad had exited from the room. He knew about Quinn. She had only mentioned her once, and that was when she had been slushied for the very first time. But after being threatened by Quinn repeatedly she had sworn on her grave never to raise the topic again. Time has a funny way of bringing back the past, and sometimes even when you don't even want it to. It just does.

The shower was warm and soothing. She concentrated on the constant flow of water splashing softly on her skin. Somehow water always had a way of calming her down. When she finally slipped under the covers of her bed she shut her eyes tight. Maybe if she prayed long and hard enough she could wish it all away. Maybe she could wish away everything that had happened, and just go back to the beginning. For a terrifying second, Rachel even imagined what her life would be like without glee club. She would have to find a way to convince Sue that she wasn't trying to sabotage the cheerios at all, and that Santana had deliberately blackmailed her.

"Rachel, open up, it's me."

Her eyes fluttered at the familiar sound that seemed to be coming from her window.

"Come on, Rach. I'm not gonna wait out here all night."

Rachel's heart began to beat faster as she sat up in her bed.

"Q-Quinn? Is that you?"

The knocking from the window sill became louder and more impatient. Rachel rushed over and unlocked it. Before her stood Quinn, soaking wet in her cheerios uniform. She smiled at Rachel kindly.

"Hi. Can I come in?"

Rachel nodded silently and watched as Quinn climbed into her room, leaving wet muddy footprints on her floor. She was dirtying it with the mushy soil from outside, but she looked beautiful. She watched her body tremble lightly from the cold, and then Quinn met her gaze.

"I saw you and Finn kissing."

Rachel gulped and frantically searched for an explanation that would sound believable.

"I-It wasn't what it looked like. I swear Quinn. He kissed me, he-" And it was only then that she realised how close Quinn had gotten. She took a deep breath and fell back onto her bed. But Quinn just continued to move closer towards her, unfazed.

"Q-Quinn, I'm sorry about what happened but I meant what I said. About you staying out of my life. I-"

"Rachel, did you enjoy it when Finn kissed you?"

And for once, Rachel was utterly speechless. Her mouth twitched uncertainly and her thoughts were fuzzy, incoherent. She was nervous. This wasn't the way she was supposed to be feeling. And it didn't help that Quinn just kept on leaning closer, her quiet confidence growing. From the way she was asking the question, she didn't seem upset in the slightest. Rather, she seemed intrigued.

"Rachel. Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?" And Quinn slowly placed her palm on Rachel's cheek.

Everything about this moment was quiet, all except for the light pitter-patter of rain outside. Somewhere in the distance there was a low rumble of thunder, but that was nothing in comparison to the raging storm in Rachel's heart. Quinn's words had struck a chord within her. There was a part of her that knew she was missing some vital link in all of this. Where had she heard those words before?

"N-No." She lied. Quinn smiled, undeterred.

She was so close that Rachel could feel her breath mingle with hers. It smelt warm and it fizzed with electricity. Rachel's eyes shut on instinct as she felt a soft velvety sensation upon her mouth. Her hands tightened their grip and squeezed, not wanting the moment to end. But soon her breaths became strained, almost choked, as she spat out fluff and dust. In her hands lay bunches of her quilt.

Rachel blinked in confusion as she stared around her bedroom wide-eyed. She had dreamt of Quinn again.


	9. Chapter 9: Facing The Music

In the morning, Rachel was unusually quiet at breakfast. Hiram was eyeing her like a hawk and Leroy wasn't missing a beat. Sometimes it was hard having parents who were so observant to details.

''Rachel, your father and I would like to have a little discussion with you about what's been going on lately.''

Rachel continued to eat her chocolate pancakes. It was strange how she kept eating and yet she wasn't getting full.

''For the past couple of months you've been locking yourself up in your room and lately, you've barely been talking to us anymore. At first we thought you were going through a phase-but Rach, we're genuinely concerned for you now. I'm not just gonna sit by on the sidelines and watch my baby suffering like this. Do you know what that's like for a parent? You do know that you can tell us anything, Rach. Is it that bully? Is it-oh Rach you've been trying to eat that piece of pancake for the past half an hour!''

She broke out of her stupor only to realise that indeed, she had been idly picking up the same portion of food and dropping it absentmindedly. She looked up guiltily at Hiram.

''Sorry Daddy, I'm just getting a bit behind at school, that's all.''

Hiram raised his eyebrows.

''Rachel Barbra Berry. If there's anyone in this world who cares about schoolwork more than you, I'll take my hat off to them. So please, if you're going to lie to us, you're gonna have to do better than that.''

Rachel sighed at her father's persistence. But a part of her swelled with happiness. He really cared about her. She paused, and then slowly began to unravel her story word by word.

''I-I'm sorry for keeping all this from you both, but-but I just didn't want to worry you unnecessarily. You were right last night, Daddy. There's this girl-Q-Quinn, and she's been giving me a really hard time at school. At first I thought it was just a joke, every time she called me all those mean names and ganged up on me with her friends. I thought that she would stop. But-but she didn't. One day she told me if I ever said anything to anyone, she'd just make things worse for me. I was afraid Daddy, I was afraid. She's so popular and I'm...I'm just a loser.''

She couldn't help it when her voice grew shaky, and she gazed back into Hiram's and Leroy's pitiful eyes.

''But yesterday at glee club I finally decided to stand up to h-her. I sang 'Beautiful' to show her that she wasn't going to affect me anymore. That I wasn't going to let her push me around. And everyone liked my singing-I finally felt like people liked me, Daddy. They weren't scared of being near me anymore. I was on my way to my next class when she stopped me. Quinn. She pulled me into the bathroom and her friends tried to-to-''

She couldn't hold in the pain any longer, and let herself erupt into tears. Leroy drew closer and pulled her into a tight embrace.

''It's ok, sweetheart. We understand. You don't have to tell us anymore.''

Rachel sobbed against him and clung to his arms for support. She hadn't even told them the whole story. And yet, they had accepted her. They had accepted her unconditionally and it felt so good to have someone on her side. She still needed to tell them one more thing though. Breaking the embrace gently, Rachel trembled before she spoke the words.

''C-Coach Sylvester made me quit glee club.''

This time Hiram was indignant.

''I'll sue that woman!''

And despite all her sorrow and troubles, it was like something in Rachel cracked at that moment and she couldn't suppress a giggle. Hiram looked at her like she was a madwoman.

''Rach-what is it? What did I say?''

Rachel just smiled and wiped away her tears. Who was she kidding? She had the greatest dads on earth. Leroy ignored Hiram's state of confusion and gently placed his fingers on Rachel's black eye.

''Does it hurt? Your father told me he didn't notice it last night in the darkness.''

She winced at the contact but shook her head.

''Volleyball accident. The school nurse took care of it.''

Leroy frowned.

''I hope you're telling me the truth, Rachel. If that Quinn girl ever dares to even breathe on you again, she'll be hearing from me.''

A flurry of uncertainty began to brew in her stomach. Now was definitely not the right time to bring up last night's dream. In fact, there would never be a right time for that. After all, honesty does have its limits.

''Yes Dad.''

''And don't you dare give up on your singing, Rachel. No matter what some pompous gym teacher says to you. You're not a loser. You're worth it. Okay darling?''

She smiled and nodded. Thank God her dads were understanding and supportive and forgi-

''By the way Rach, your Daddy found this in the wash today. It almost ended up getting stuck in the machine but he spotted it at the last minute. Is it something important?''

And her heartbeat accelerated from zero to two-hundred kilometres in one second flat. There, in Leroy's hand was a folded up piece of white paper. She had forgotten to take out the letter before her shower.

''N-No of course not.'' Rachel said nervously and she snatched the paper as unenthusiastically as she could. ''Um, I feel like going for a walk. I'll be back in a little while.''

She stood up suddenly, leaving her now cold pancakes uneaten on the plate. She was almost at the door when Leroy's voice stopped her.

''Who wrote it Rachel?''

No no no. They had read it. They had actually read it. Everything up until this point had gone so smoothly and something just had to ruin it. Her heart hammered in her chest and she answered without turning.

''I don't know.''

''Rachel! It's that boy isn't it!''

But then she was out the door, not giving her over inquisitive fathers a chance to continue their interrogation. Well, not exactly interrogation. But for some reason she felt like a criminal that was hiding a valuable piece of knowledge.  
And she had to keep it secret at all costs. She would keep the identity of the author of the letter hidden-hold on. Even she didn't know who had written it. The gears in her mind whirred with excitement. It wasn't Finn. And thank goodness for that. She subconsciously mulled over who exactly might have written her the letter until she felt her body slam into something.

''Watch where you're going!''

Her shoulder felt like it had been grazed by an angry bull, and she looked up to see who the rude voice belonged to. She felt the ends of her fingers stiffen with anxiety.

''Oh, it's you Berry. Can't say I'm surprised. Bletheim's right about all you glee snobs being so caught up in your own world you can't see what's right in front of you.''

Rachel frowned. If Sue Sylvester was good at one thing, it was hurling insults at people who didn't deserve them. It was bad enough dealing with her at school, but now Rachel had the displeasure of accidentally bumping into her on her morning jog. Puck's comment about her just starting menopause flashed through her mind and she shuddered.

''Well, I won't interrupt your day full of pointless activities any longer. See you at school.''

And she whizzed around the corner without glancing back. For now, Rachel decided she would ignore Sue's disparaging remark. If she wanted to get back into glee, she would have to stand up to her just like she did with Quinn and Santana. Her dads were right. She was worth it.

Lost in thought, she had unconsciously wound up at the library. Perhaps this would be a good place to start. She would look for the perfect song and re-audition for glee club, and ace it. The double doors swung open and she was hit with that familiar gust of books. At least she'd be able to have some privacy here. She was getting quite fed up with having random rendezvous with people that she was on awkward terms with. She headed towards the non-fiction section and noticed a girl with long golden hair having an animated conversation from the corner of her eye.

Please God, not again.

Her pulse quickened, and she was about to turn around and sprint out the doors when the girl's body moved to the left. Rachel stared at her oblivious blue eyes, and breathed out with relief. Glancing around, she noticed that a huge number of people, girls especially, seemed to have long blonde hair.

Now she felt like she was in some Where's Wally cartoon, except Wally was Quinn.

Ridiculous.

Why did everyone look like her? Wait, why was she even thinking of her? No more thinking about Qui-that girl.

She proceeded to the music section, the final aisle after Poetry, and began filing through the large tomes excitedly. History of Pop. Broadway classics-she squealed silently at that one. She was so immersed in her search for the perfect song that she almost didn't hear the shuffling on the other side of the shelf. Dismissing her curiosity to peek through the shelf, she wedged the letter between the pages as a bookmark and began searching.

But then, there was a voice that Rachel could recognise anywhere. It was soft, pleading. She felt like she had heard it before in a dream-and it came from the other side of the shelf. She stopped rummaging through the book and gave into her curiosity to peek through the shelf. And gasped.

''And blood burnt round my heart...Are flowers the winter's choice? Is love's bed always snow? She seemed to hear my silent voice, not love appeals to know. I never saw so sweet a face, as that I stood before... My heart has left its dwelling place, and can return no more.''

If you have ever been completely and utterly hypnotised by something, you will know how difficult it is to even breathe. Something that is so beautiful it shakes your very core, something that makes you want to reach out and touch it, something that makes you feel you've just died and been resurrected again. For a moment Rachel felt giddy, like she was on an upside-down roller-coaster and she couldn't hang on. But she didn't want to hang on. What was wrong with her?

''Attention. If there is a Rachel Berry in the library, please come to the reception desk. A Mr. Leroy Berry is here to pick you up. Rachel Berry, please report to the reception.''

Rachel gulped. She hadn't expected her dads to guess her location with such precision. But she did expect it when the girl through the bookshelf flickered her hazel eyes towards her.

And her heart stopped.


	10. Chapter 10: Killing Me Softly

**A/N: A VERY big thank you to each and every single person who has read, reviewed, followed and favourited this story. It means so much and it fills my heart with JOY^-^ I really hope you all enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Your comments made me smile, made me put my critical cap on, and told me exactly what you felt about everything. So this story is growing into what it is because of all your feedback^^ And though I can't reveal exactly how events will unfold, I can promise the road ahead will be full of wonderful cliffhangers:) I will see you all again soon, and thanks again for coming on this journey with me!**

* * *

Do you know that feeling when your knees go all gooey and you feel like you're about to topple over? Most times, it takes you completely by surprise. And for Rachel, who had never felt it before, boy was it a surprise. She tried to pull her gaze away from Quinn's face but it seemed to be stuck. Oh God. Why couldn't she look away? She wasn't even supposed to be here. What on earth was she doing here reading breathtakingly beautiful poetry?

''Rachel?''

The book in her hands dropped to the floor.

No.

She did not just say her name with a quivering voice.

And her face did most certainly not just turn red.

She had to get out of here immediately.

Rachel practically ripped her eyes out of the stranglehold Quinn had on them and bolted. Straight towards the reception desk where her Dad was waiting for her.

''So you were lurking here after all. Lucky your father and I have degrees in espionage.''

Rachel looked up at him quizzically. He just smiled.

''You know your daddy and I first met in a library? From then on we always met in secret. Always behind the bookshelves.''

Leroy laughed as they stepped out of the building, reflecting on some memory with a nostalgic look in his eyes. He held open the door for Rachel, not noticing that she was blushing furiously and was trying to wipe the sweat off her face. In vain.

''So Rach, why the sudden escape? Do you have an assignment for school you needed to work on?'' He asked with genuine interest.

''Uh, yes. I was picking a song that I could re-audition with for glee club.''

''That's my girl. Find anything good?''

Rachel was about to answer when she imagined her name being called out from behind them. Wow. Not only was she having dreams of her and running into her in unexpected places, but she was hallucinating about her as well.

''Rachel, there's a girl calling out your name back there. Is she a friend of yours?''

Without thinking she gripped Leroy's hand tightly in hers and led him towards the car. When they were inside with their seatbelts buckled up and the car was revving, he turned to Rachel confusedly.

''Rach, would you mind telling me what's going on? Why are you running? That isn't-''

''It is, Dad.''

Oh. Understanding dawned on his face and his confused expression was replaced with an angry one. He was livid, and she could see it in his eyes.

''You weren't just talking to her, where you sweetie? She wasn't attacking you or-''

''No Dad. Please, just drive me back home.''

He nodded and slowly backed out of the leaf-covered carpark. The journey home was spent in a long and awkward silence. Rachel wanted to say something to her Dad but she didn't have the words. She felt like Ariel must have felt when Ursula stole her voice. When they pulled into the driveway her Dad was the first to speak.

''I meant what I said Rach. If she so much as breathes on you, I'll never forgive her. You are not to speak to that girl again, do you understand?''

She nodded. And Rachel knew that Leroy had her best interests at heart. She knew he wanted to protect her. But she couldn't help but feel the sting from his words. Why? Why did she feel like she wanted to go right back to the library, and see if Quinn was still waiting for her in the doorway?

Sighing, she stepped out of the car and headed up to the front door and went inside. The rest of the weekend passed by slowly. Excruciatingly so, until Sunday night that is. When Rachel closed her eyes to go to sleep that night, her head was full of wandering thoughts. She wondered about how her plan to get back into glee club would go, about how her dads first met, and about Qu-ok stop right there. Thinking about these things too much was just going to give her a headache, and she really didn't need that when she would be facing that madwoman Sylvester tomorrow.

''Rachel, slow down!''

She was running from someone, but she didn't want to turn around to face them. She couldn't.

''Rach, I won't hurt you anymore, I promise!''

The familiar voice echoed all around her, and she couldn't help but be sucked into its pull. Still, she resisted.

''N-No, Quinn, I don't believe you! Leave me alone!''

''Rachel please! I'm begging you!''

And Rachel finally ran out of breath and collapsed onto the training tracks. She looked up to see Quinn's figure flop down next to her, just as exhausted as she was.

''Rachel.'' She said with a heavy breath as she looked up to meet her eyes.

''You dropped something.''

Quinn was extending her hand towards Rachel, and in it was a folded white piece of paper. She had seen it before. She hesitantly reached out to take it from her hand and felt an electric spark jolt through her fingers when skin met skin. For a moment, she just let their hands be, in that temporary lock. It was as if the whole world had been blocked out, and only Quinn and her existed. It felt...special. All too soon, Quinn pulled her hand away, but it felt like she had given her the paper. It was Quinn's gift to her. Her way of saying sorry for everything she'd said and done.

''Th-thank you, Quinn.''

She smiled happily, and edged closer towards her. Much too close towards her. She could feel her warm breath caressing her mouth. Her dads were definitely going to ground her for that one.

''Do you feel it?''

''W-What?'' Rachel said with trembling lips.

Quinn gently took her hand again and placed it against her beating chest.

''The blood burning around my heart.''

And that was all it took for Rachel to faint.

''Rise and shine, cupcake!''

Hiram's booming jolly tone woke her up in an instant, and she knew she had been dreaming again. And goodness if anyone ever had access to those dreams, and decided to broadcast them on television, she would surely die of embarrassment. But what surprised her most was why she had imagined Quinn of all people to be the author of...and suddenly realisation came crashing down upon her. It was the letter. She frantically searched around her room to no avail, and eventually remembered that she had forgotten it inside that book at the library. Curses. Somebody else could have taken it by now. But there was still a chance, no matter how slim, that it would still be there. She would have to go and get it after school.

Rachel ran down the stairs in a rush, and grabbed breakfast before she went out the door.

''Morning have a nice day gotta go now thanks bye!'' She said all in one breath, and let her dads continue eating in peace. They were used to hyper-Rachel by now.

When she arrived at school she headed straight to Sue Sylvester's office, and knocked on the door loudly.

No response.

She tried again, and even tried to peek through the glass, but it seemed deserted. Sylvester had been away from school before, but that was once, and it was when she had attended a protest against having music as a subject at secondary school.

''Berry get out of my doorway and go sing before I find another reason to have you removed from that ministry of morons.''

In a second Sylvester had pushed past her and was opening the door to her office.

''W-Wh-Coach Sylvester I thought you said I-''

''It seems that Santana made an error in judgement.''

Rachel looked up at her incredulously. Was Sue Sylvester just admitting that she was wrong?

''I'm warning you Berry, if you keep sitting there like a stunned mullet I will change my mind.''

She nodded and began walking down the corridor towards glee club. She was confused. She had gone to all the trouble of picking out a song for the purpose of proving she belonged to glee club, and that she had no ulterior motives in bringing down the cheerleading squad. And yet, all of a sudden Sylvester had given her a get out of jail free card. Santana wouldn't have just backed down like that. There was someone else involved in all of this, that Rachel was sure of.

''Welcome back, Rachel.''

It was Mr. Schue, smiling at her cordially.

''We thought we'd lost your wonderful voice for a moment there, but luckily Quinn sorted things out.''

The saying 'expect the unexpected' exists for a reason, but this was something so unexpected that it could never possibly be expected. She was back in glee because of Quinn. For some reason, Quinn had helped her. Rachel's eyes searched the room and found Quinn seated in the front row with her face pointed away from her. Santana glanced back at her with a snarl.

''Alright, we'll get started. Remember we're continuing with the same theme as last week-exploration of our feelings of the present moment. I know this is a hard topic to prepare for guys, but I hope that you've looked up something at least. Who wants to go first?''

To everyone's surprise, and probably Mr. Schue the most, Quinn's hand shot upward.

''Oh-Quinn-you'll be performing with Brittany and Santana?''

''Yes. And the song we're singing is 'Killing Me Softly'. I can't explain exactly why I chose it, but I suppose it does reflect how I'm feeling right now.''

There were a few gasps and people muttered something about her break-up with Finn. The Cheerios took to the stage, and waited for Mr. Schue's countdown before they launched into the song.

At first, no one knew what to expect, but when their three voices combined it was almost like you could feel the sadness just oozing out of the song. Rachel couldn't even understand how it was possible that they could put such emotion into it. And Quinn. Especially Quinn. The pain was permanently etched on her face. But there was something more to it.

Maybe it was only Rachel who saw the silent tears in her eyes. And maybe it was only Rachel who felt that this song wasn't about Finn.


	11. Chapter 11: Predator

A very good performer knows how to captivate their audience from the beginning.

It's so subtle that everyone watching on doesn't even know how it happens. In fact, it's almost the same way a rose seems to be so enamouring with its delicate crimson folds and its sweet aroma. But when you reach out to touch it, you get pricked.

In a sense, the cheerios were the roses of McKinley high. They were so effortlessly beautiful and their voices were divine. When their performance was over, everyone clapped with enthusiasm and they bowed gracefully. It was like they were equals with everyone else. But you knew better than to talk with them after. That was out of the question, because now they were top of the social ladder again just like always.

"Good job guys, I think we could all really feel your connection to it. Especially you, Quinn. Have you ever considered acting? I think it just might be your forte."

Quinn just shrugged noncommittally. Rachel had been watching her the entire performance, and not once had she looked her way. Perhaps she was just reading too much into things. After all, Quinn was practically made of steel. There's no way she would have been so affected by their showdown and her break-up with Finn.

"Okay, has anyone else got anything prepared? I think we have time for one more song."

And when Finn began to slowly raise his hand, Rachel felt this sense of dread come over her. He turned his face to wink at her, and she prayed the cheerios didn't see what just happened.

"So lately there's been this one girl who I can't stop thinking about. She's got a voice like an angel and, to me, she really is beautiful. This is for her."

Rachel felt her body heat up and she put her palms over her face to hide her embarrassment. If it wasn't obvious before it certainly would be now.

"I can't take my eyes off you, Rachel Berry."

She tried desperately to drown out the whooping sounds coming from Puck's direction and didn't dare look the cheerios in the face. Everyone else seemed to be a mix of surprise and disbelief. This is what it must feel like to be a domino, Rachel thought to herself. When one falls, they all fall down.

Finn was a sweet boy, really. Apart from the fact that he had so ruthlessly dumped his girlfriend without a second thought. The irony in all of this was that Quinn had accused Rachel of wanting Finn for herself, when in fact, she couldn't have been more wrong.

His voice grew louder and louder until the chorus, which he belted out passionately. It practically sounded like he was right in front of her. And to her dismay, when she peeked through her fingers, there he was. Finn Hudson on his knees, singing-no serenading her in front of the rest of glee club. She was mortified. When the last note rang out of his mouth he was grinning at her expectantly.

"Well, wasn't that a fabulous performance guys." Mr. Schue said reluctantly as he forced a clap. "Sometimes music is also a great way to tell someone else the way you feel about them. Thanks, Finn."

Finn couldn't wipe the smile off his face as he went to sit back down on his seat.

The bell rang loudly and people began collecting their books to leave. But Rachel still couldn't process what had just happened. How strange that she found herself wishing that it was just a dream. Just last week she would have been delighted to have this kind of attention from anybody.

"Hey."

It was Finn, and Rachel felt the chair next to her scratch against the floor when he slumped into it. When she looked up at his face she could see he was blushing. Obviously, it had taken a great deal of courage for him to stand up in front of everyone like that and confess his feelings. If she ever felt like that about someone-not that she did-Rachel knew she couldn't possibly do the same. Sure, she could perform in front of huge crowds without feeling her heart beat even a smidgeon faster. But singing in front of the person you liked...that would be harder than singing on a stage with the whole world listening.

"Rach, I don't wanna pressure you or anything like that. But I think you're awesome and...a-and I just wanted to know whether you'd like to hang out sometime."

And there were the words, hanging in the air between them, suspended like atoms in space.

There was a tiny part of her that wanted to say yes. She had been so lonely, disregarded and unappreciated all this time that having someone open up to her like this was really cathartic. She knew if she said yes that Finn would be happy. But-and her eyes unconsciously darted around the room towards Quinn-she just didn't have the heart to go through with it.

"Finn, I understand the position you're in and while I do appreciate your wonderful dedication to me," Rachel chose carefully so he woudn't misconstrue what she was saying, "I just don't feel that-"

"Finnept, get your paws off the dwarf and stop trying to ask her out. She's not interested."

"S-Santana," Finn said with surprise, "I wasn't asking her out, I-I just wanted to see if she'd hang with me and stuff."

She just sighed, exasperated.

"Whatever. Berry, Q wants to talk to you about the oaf here."

Before she knew it, Santana had gripped her hand tightly and was leading her away.

"S-Santana, I'm not just gonna keep playing your little games."

They had reached the girls' bathroom and Santana freed her arm to face her. She looked her up and down, nodding her head approvingly.

"Not bad, berry. Not bad. You know I kind of admired you in Geography the other day too. But we've got not time for praise right now. I don't know how you did it, but Finnarticulate is swooning over you and that's just not fair to Q. I may be a bitch, but I don't like it when Q's upset. So you better go and sort things out with her."

"But I-"

Suddenly Rachel felt Santana's hand on her back pushing her into the bathroom, and heard the door lock behind her. How Santana managed to obtain the keys to the school toilets she had no idea, but right now she had more pressing matters at hand.

Quinn was staring at her with a fierce look on her face.


	12. Chapter 12: Close To You

If there was ever a rose with thorns, Quinn Fabray was it. Rachel did her best to keep her fear at bay, but facing her in a locked bathroom was both terrifying and overwhelming. As if picking up on the tension, Quinn took a step closer, eyes narrowing.

''Rachel Berry.''

Just from the way Quinn uttered her name Rachel felt small convulsions erupting along her body.

''Rachel Berry do you think you can just take Finn from me like that and get away with it? He's my boyfriend, I've told you that. So why don't you just back off and go crawl in a hole with all your stupid feelings!''

Quinn's voice was loud and piercing and made her ears throb. Rachel couldn't pretend any longer. The words stung and they stung hard. But she wasn't going to let Quinn have one over her anymore like the old Rachel would.

''I will most certainly not go and crawl in a hole, and my feelings are not stupid! Quinn, don't you understand? I don't even like him, he just...cornered me! I never expected him to-''

''Oh don't even try Rachel, we both know how much you're in love with him. But you know how this is all gonna end? He's gonna pick me, Rachel. He loves me. So I'm just trying to make things easier for you and send you on your way. Stop taking things that don't belong to you or I-''

And that was it. Rachel really was a very patient person, but Quinn had her at the end of her tether and she finally let the floodgates open.

''Or you'll what, Quinn? Throw a slushie on me? Call me a few names? Maybe I would have tolerated that in the past, but not anymore. I never asked Finn to serenade me in front of the entire glee club, I never asked him to carry my books, and I-''

''You never kissed him in front of my face outside the changing room and enjoyed it? What did it feel like, Rachel? Did your heart beat fast? Did you hear fireworks going off all around you?''

Rachel had forgotten that, and instantly felt guilty. Quinn certainly knew exactly how to hurt her, and when she did it was merciless. She stared into Quinn's sunken eyes, now covered by a thin watery film. She was cracking just like Rachel was.

''Stop it. Just stop it, ok? You act like you know everything, when really, you have no idea Quinn. Finn asked me to go to his game and I-I said no. But he m-misunderstood and I couldn't just let him down like that...and then, a-after the game I went looking for you and he w-was just there-he was just there out of nowhere Quinn, and then you-''

Suddenly, Quinn grew furious and and practically slammed Rachel against the wall. She tried to break free from her arms, but they were like iron bars.

''Don't lie to me, Rachel.''

Rachel's heart was in overdrive. She drew forth every ounce of stamina within herself to control it and met Quinn's threatening glare.

''I'm not. And if I'm such a liar, then why are you tiptoeing around your friends to get me back into Glee?''

''That was...I-I-''

And just like that, the glare dissolved into denial. Rachel couldn't believe it. Quinn Fabray stumbling over her words, because of her!

''Listen, Rachel. I don't care what you think I did, but just know this-it wasn't for you. Santana just did that to get back at you because that's how she rolls, but it still doesn't make it right.''

A loud banging interrupted their argument unexpectedly, and Santana's voice wafted through the door.

''Don't think I can't hear you, Q. Even the walls have ears around here. But I think I'll let you guys continue your making out session now.''

The sound of Santana's footsteps becoming softer and softer as she walked off was the only thing that broke the silence between them. Rachel awkwardly tried to shift from the position she was in, but Quinn seemed too dumbfounded to react properly. She coughed very deliberately and stared up at Rachel with renewed anger.

''Like I said Rachel, don't lie to me. Just say it. Say it to my face so we can get over all of this. So Finn and I can go back to being the way we were with you out of the picture.''

But for some reason, the harsh biting tone didn't sting like before. And her eyes-they had transformed to become soft and pleading. Rachel's arms quivered against Quinn's and she licked her lips. Oh God why was she doing that at a time like this!

''R-Rachel,'' Quinn faltered, her eyes lingering on Rachel's mouth momentarily, ''J-Just tell me that you dream of him every night, and that he's the first thing you think about when you wake up and before you go to sleep.''

Her voice had been reduced to all but a whisper, and she was breathing heavily against her. This feeling-it was that same fuzzy and incoherent one she had felt in her dream, when-

''Tell me.''

That inexplicable tightness in the pit of her stomach during the football game had suddenly returned. And when she tried to speak all that came out was a quiet whimper. Rachel's brain was screaming at her right now, screaming at her to run far, far away. But her legs wouldn't move.

''Q-Quinn, I understand that you love Finn in a way I never can or will, and for that reason I surrender him to you. But just so you know...'' And now she felt so light-headed that it was like someone else was saying the words for her, ''S-Santana was right in the sick bay. The person I dream about i-isn't Finn.''

And her heart drummed like a marching band as the words escaped her mouth.

''It's you.''


	13. Chapter 13: Façade

Telling somebody that you like them, or even hinting at the possibility you do is something that takes a lot of guts. And it takes a lot of guts because it usually ends in one of two ways.

In the first ending, the person you like reciprocates your feelings, and you both live happily ever after.

The alternative is nowhere near as pleasant. It involves unrequited feelings, which means one person ends up getting heartbroken.

Usually people avoid telling the person altogether in case they never get their happy ending. And as Rachel stood there, she couldn't help but feel she had made a very big mistake.

Quinn slowly freed Rachel's arms and stepped back, putting some distance between them. Rachel prayed for her to say something. Anything. The big fat elephant in the room kept threatening to squash her, and now she just wanted to erase herself from existence. Heck, she even wished that Moaning Myrtle popped up out of the sink and dragged her down into it. She lowered her gaze to keep herself from meeting Quinn's eyes. She felt hollow, like someone had severed her heart in two. There was no way she could handle this right now.

''Rachel?''

Quinn's voice was unsteady. It almost sounded like she was trying to hold back a laugh. Oh God how stupid had she been! In a moment of weakness she had let all her confusion gush out of her, right in front of the girl who had mocked and insulted her for what seemed like millennia. Instead of guarding herself from the monster that was Quinn, she had left herself utterly exposed.

''Rachel...you're crying.''

And the brilliant performance continued. Mr. Schue was right. If there was anyone who deserved a gold medal for acting, it was Quinn. True enough, when Rachel touched her cheeks, they were damp with tears. She had to get out of here. She couldn't let Quinn see her breaking down for a second time. Keeping her gaze rooted to the floor, Rachel turned and faced the door, and yanked at the doorknob with all her might.

''Santana! Santana open up! Open the door please!''

In her whole time at McKinley, Rachel had never wanted to see Santana's face as much as she did now. She banged her fists against the door incessantly, but second period was well underway and it was unlikely anybody could hear. She could hear Quinn shuffling behind her but she ignored it. For all she knew she was probably texting Santana and Brittany about her embarrassing confession.

''Rachel, look at me.''

No, Rachel. Do not listen to that voice. She just wants to see you crying your heart out so she can burst out laughing. Dad said to stay away from her and that's exactly what you're going to do. She's bad news. Rachel's brain kept sending her commands that she was barely able to follow. But she would do it. She would hold on just a little bit more until Santana came back to free them.

At least that's what she thought, because one second later there were smooth hands on her face, gently rotating her head away from the door until her eyes were staring straight ahead.

''I'm not going to hurt you anymore, ok?'

Quinn was staring at her intensely. Her pupils were dilated, probably from the exhilaration she would get at seeing her crumble before her. But it was so impossibly easy to give in to her-Quinn and her silken words, Quinn and her magnetic charm, Quinn and her hypnotic hazel eyes. She made it seem like the Quinn who had broken her time and time again was just a figment of her imagination. Rachel forced herself to look downwards, and picked something neutral to project her concentration onto. The floor looked good at this point. She heard Quinn sigh furstratedly and felt her face being lifted back up towards her.

''I know you can't just forgive me for months and months of cruelty. I know it. But I'm not asking for an apology, Rachel. I'm just giving you my word. And when Quinn Fabray promises something she means it. So just stop crying, please. It really doesn't suit you.''

Quinn's hands slid away from her face slowly, and it almost seemed like she didn't want to let go. Rachel instantly missed the warmth of her palms on her cheeks, and heard herself sigh audibly. The crazy side of her even imagined Quinn bite her lip ever so slightly. How pathetic. Here she was about to get ridiculed again by the greatest manipulator on earth and she was noticing things like that.

''Y-You look much better when you're s-singing in glee...that's when you're really beautiful.''

Rachel wiped the tears from her eyes with trembling fingers. Her stupid heart was pounding again, brought to life by Quinn's words. Her words were shaky, fragile. If she touched them they would smash into a thousand tiny pieces. Rachel wanted to believe her. She wished that it wasn't all an act and that behind those stoic eyes there was an ounce of truth. She was so caught up in worrying how Quinn would betray her that she hadn't processed exactly what she had said.

''Rachel?''

Quinn had narrowed the gap between them and her clenched fists shook by her sides. Rachel was not going to fall for this, no matter how convincing it was. She remained silent, desperate not to expose herself ever again.

''I just wanted to know. Did you mean it...''

And Quinn took a deep breath and cast her burning face to the side for air. Wait, when did she get so red?

''D-Did you mean it when you said that you...dreamt...of me?''

And now Rachel absolutely hated herself because she was definitely falling for it, and she was falling hard. Dammit. Why was this so frustrating? She could feel her own face begin to flush, and she was starting to feel like someone sucked the air out of her lungs. Quinn's voice was making her head swim, making her feel things she hadn't thought were possible. She would lie. She would lie just like she had lied in sick-bay.

''N-No.''

It was all over. Her stuttering voice had given her away. She dropped her face to the floor in resignation. Quinn was going to flip out her phone, call Santana to confirm what Rachel had revealed earlier on, and then they would all stand there laughing trimphantly. Rachel couldn't believe that she had given someone as heartless as Quinn a second chance.

But when she dared to look up again, all she saw was the face of a sad little girl, searching for answers just like she was. Quinn was crying. Silent tears melted into her skin, but her clenched fists didn't budge to try and hide them. She was too proud for that.

There was a clinking sound in the doorway, and a whiny creaking sound before loud, angry footsteps were heard and Sue Sylvester entered the room. She sniffed her nose pointedly before she spoke.

''Berry. No sooner than I let you you rejoin that club of losers you're here whingeing in bathrooms and merrily skipping classes. For a straight-A student like you I find that disgusting. I'll see you in detention, today. But what surprises me is you, Quinn. I expect more from my head cheerio than to be associating with glee riff-raff. And for that, I'm giving you detention as well. See you on the tracks ladies.''

The door banged shut behind her as she left them both in their halo of awkwardness. Unexpectedly, Quinn broke the silence.

''Well Rachel, I guess I'll see you later then. Coach is probably gonna get us to do laps, so I hope you can handle it.''

Her voice was restrained, apathetic. She pulled out a neatly folded tissue from her pocket and dabbed at the wetness surrounding her eyes. Rachel watched her in silence as she moved towards the door, and felt a jolt of anxiety when she turned around again to face her.

''I'm glad we could finally be honest with each other, Rachel.''

Her voice now was professional, masking any form of weakness-real, or imagined.

''But there's just one more thing I'd like to say to you. I feel like I owe you...silly isn't it.''

Rachel could feel her head growing faint, and blood rushing through her heart madly, and she wasn't in the least bit sure why.

''That song that I chose to sing in glee wasn't about my break-up with Finn. It...was about you.''

And Quinn exited the bathroom, leaving the door to swing shut behind her.


	14. Chapter 14: Fever

Rachel sat quietly in English class, trying to concentrate on what the teacher was saying and at the same time, trying to ignore Finn. He kept on accidentally bumping her with his arm, although she swore a few times it was on purpose.

The teacher had decided they would begin one of the most over-studied Shakespeare plays, 'Romeo and Juliet'. Apparently, it was a classic that 'simply begged for analysis.' It wasn't that Rachel thought the concept was unoriginal, but she definitely wasn't in the mood for a tragic love story right now.

All she could think about was Quinn. Something inside Rachel had changed after seeing Quinn crying like that. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but it must have happened when Quinn told her there was something else she wanted to say. Her fingers idly tapped at the table as Finn recited the lines from the play.

"O blessed, blessed night! I am afeard. Being in night, all this is but a dream! Too flattering-sweet to be substantial."

And then she had told her something she never thought she'd hear in her wildest dreams. She had sang that song...all for her. What did it mean? How could she be 'killing' Quinn? And more importantly, why was it making her feel so giddy just thinking about it?

Suddenly she felt someone elbowing her roughly on the side.

''Rach, your line.'' Finn whispered urgently.

Rachel's concentration snapped back onto the text infront of her. She sighed impatiently, again wishing that Finn hadn't volunteered her to be Juliet.

''Three words, dear Romeo, and good night indeed. If that thy bent of love be honourable, thy purpose marriage, send me word to-morrow, by one that I'll procure to come to thee. Where and what time thou wilt perform the rite; and all my fortunes at thy foot I'll lay, and follow thee my lord throughout the world.''

Honourable love, indeed. She had read the play a thousand times before, and it made her wince every time she reached this scene. Who in their right mind would enter someone's property-quite illegally she was sure-traverse a garden, single-handedly climb a balcony and declare their undying passion for someone? Her thoughts became unconscious for a moment, and she imagined Quinn dressed in tights just like Romeo.

''No!''

Everyone's heads turned to look at her in shock. Flushing with embarrassment she ducked her head down, unable to believe she had just screamed that out loud.

''Rach, are you ok? You've like, got a fever or something.''

Finn was staring at her with a mixture of care and confusion.

''Yes Finn, I'm absolutely fine. I-I think I just need to go and cool down.''

Rachel pushed her chair back, and after getting permission from the teacher, headed back to the bathroom. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, and it stared back at her. She did look sick. Her face was burning up, her palms were sweaty, and there was a strange swirling in her stomach. And yet, she didn't feel nauseated. Well, at least not in a bad way. She shook her head, and splashed cold water all over her face before she exited and returned to class.

The rest of the day went by quickly. Perhaps it was because of how badly she wanted to rush off to the library and see if the note was still there. Hearing the bell, she smiled gratefully and paced down the corridor towards her locker.

''Rachel!''

Finn was leaning against her locker with a confident smirk on his face.

''Hey, I just wanted to check up on you, see if you're ok.''

Rachel nodded, not quite sure what he was getting at. A blush began to creep over his face.

''I uh, know it must be hard to hide your feelings like that. But it's ok, Rach. I feel the same.''

She stared at his face blankly for a moment, and then she realised what he meant. He still thought that she had a crush on him.

''So, if you like, we could hang at mine today. You know, just play some video games and stuff.''

She took a deep and heavy breath. How could this possibly be more wrong? Not only had she told him explicitly she didn't want to do anything with him on a romantic level, but Santana had stepped in to reiterate the very same thing earlier today. She had to give him credit for his persistence, but not for his sense of morals. Dumping Quinn for her was absolu-

Frantically, Rachel glanced at her wristwatch and noted the time. She had forgotten completely.

''I'm grateful for your offer, but I'm afraid Coach Sylvester gave me detention this afternoon.''

Finn's face slumped.

''Well, did you wanna make it tomorrow instead then?''

At that moment Sue Sylvester came charging down the corridor, with an athletic stride and a wicked grin. She retrieved a whistle from her pocket and blew it loudly to get their attention. But knowing her, it was probably to destroy their hearing cells.

''Berry! You've got no time to be canoodling with Hudson! Down to the tracks immediately!''

She disappeared down the corridor, and Finn fell groaned with frustration.

''I swear Rachel, it's like everytime I try and speak to you something's gotta interrupt.''

He smiled. He really was doing his best to make her laugh.

''So, tomorrow?''

There was a loud bang nearby and Quinn stormed by, giving Finn a dirty look. When her eyes landed on Rachel they softened for a moment.

''Coach makes you do extra laps if you're late.''

She was trying to be firm but there was something else in her words, something tender. She flipped her head away and followed Sylvester down towards the tracks.

Rachel didn't realise, but her whole body had stiffened. She fumbled with her bag awkwardly, and looked up at Finn's pleading face. She felt guilty but she knew that she had to go. Sylvester was definitely crazy enough to do something like that.

''I'm sorry Finn, maybe some other time.''

And she rushed down the corridor so she could catch up to Quinn.

''So, exactly how many extra laps does she make us do?''

Quinn grinned and turned to face her. Her eyes seemed to glisten and there was something mischievous about her expression.

''I made that up.''

Rachel froze.

''W-Why would you do that?''

Quinn was still grinning when she said the words, and Rachel began to feel nauseated all over again.

''Well, Finn can't have you all to himself. And besides, who said I wanted him anyway?''


	15. Chapter 15: Everytime We Touch

If Rachel was confused before, then what she was experiencing now was chaos. And it was chaos at its best. She dumbly followed Quinn across the school grounds, her head bursting with thoughts that could only be described as mad. She glanced at the girl in front of her, who was lightly jogging up ahead, her beautiful golden hair freely slapping against the wind. The feeling of nausea inside Rachel intensified. She would make sense of this chaos, piece by piece.

Quinn deliberately lied to get Finn away from me. Well, that's understandable. After all, he is her ex-boyfriend, and just because he dumped her so heartlessly it doesn't mean her feelings for him are gonna vanish just like that...But the part that doesn't make sense, is what Quinn said after. How can she still love him and yet not want him? And...and she was just joking when she said that song was for me, wasn't she?

''God you're slow, Rachel.''

She snapped out of her inner monologue as she noticed Quinn approaching her. She looked as if she had read Rachel's thoughts. The corners of her mouth were curved into a crooked smile, and seconds later one of Quinn's hands was wrapped around her own. She felt a tremor building up inside her arm as she let Quinn lead her towards the red and white oval.

This was wrong.

Her dads would a) murder her for disrespecting their wishes and b) take back the Funny Girl ticket as punishment. And then they'd probably ground her for life.

But the second Quinn's fingers clasped around her hand she had felt at peace, and maybe even a little bit nervous.

This was so, so wrong, but at the same time it felt so good. She kept her eyes away from Quinn, however, because everytime she looked at her, the sick feeling in her stomach seemed to get worse.

''Berry! Q! Get ready for a work out that'll wear you out to the bone! You've got 5 minutes!''

Sylvester's booming voice blared out from the megaphone and echoed across the field, causing the bleachers to rattle. Rachel felt Quinn's hand loosen from hers and watched her move into a wide stance, starting to stretch from side to side. Suddenly her eyes flashed up towards hers.

''You're not going to warm up?''

Quinn looked serious.

''I didn't think it was necessary.''

She heard Quinn chuckle in reply. She sounded so carefree, so unlike the Quinn she was used to seeing.

''Don't we have to do warm-up exercises for our voice in glee? It's the same thing when you run, Rachel. Gotta relax the tension in your muscles.''

''Oh...''

Well, this was awkward. Quinn fought back a smile.

''Want me to show you?''

This was the point where Rachel should have screamed out in protest, and refused Quinn's offer. Quinn was a big bad bully, a wolf in sheep's clothing that slithered her way closer and closer until she got what she wanted. No, she would not be 'showing' her anything. But she began edging closer, seemingly unfazed, her slender arms lifting to reach her frame.

Now, Rachel. Say something!

But quite to her surprise, when she opened her mouth to speak, the only sound that came out was a muffled noise that sounded like 'mmmph'. Oh God. Her head fell down in embarrassment.

And then Quinn's soft hands were around her waist, positioning her so she could do the warm-ups. Rachel breathed out and felt her torso shake at the contact.

''So what we usually do for cheerios practice is stretching out our legs, they're called 'walking lunges'. You kind of step out in front with one leg, and...''

Rachel's eyes became hyper-aware as she watched one of Quinn's hands descend upon her leg. She found herself wishing that she didn't decide to wear shorts today of all days. Quinn moved her hand slowly across her skin, until she reached her knee, and pushed her leg outwards. Her fingers gently wrapped around her knee tighter, to get a better grip, and Rachel felt a tingling sensation begin to spread throughout her. She bit her lower lip hard, fighting the urge to look at Quinn's face, desperate to calm her racing heart.

She couldn't resist any longer.

At first, it was just a peek. But then when her eyes fully flickered upward she felt the nausea hit her hard.

Quinn's mouth was moving, but she couldn't hear what she was saying. It was like watching a TV on mute. Her red lips were perfectly shaped as they enunciated each syllable, her white teeth flashing every now and then. Rachel felt Quinn's other hand leave her waist, and lower down to her knee, pointing out how exactly she should bend it, her index finger brushing against her skin each time. She would flip her head to the side when the wind blew her perfect hair in her face, and it sent with it a breeze of fresh lemon that Rachel found maddening. Her eyes fluttered shut and she heard a quiet moan leave her throat.

''Rachel! Are you alright? You're all red.''

Her eyes flashed open and the first thing she saw was Quinn staring at her with a surprised expression laced with something undefinable, unrecognisable. When she looked down she noticed Quinn's hand hadn't budged, and the realisation made her heart race even faster.

''Time's up, ladies! Get into your positions!''

Rachel sighed gratefully. Her body felt ablaze, she needed to get this run over and done with and then leave to go see a Doctor. This was no ordinary fever.

Without thinking, she unlinked herself from Quinn and jogged over towards the starting position. The tightness in her stomach was making her squirm, but it must have been that adrenaline kick you get before sprinting. Of course that was it.

Quinn moved up one lane away from her and knelt down slowly. Rachel felt her body heat up but she kept her gaze focused ahead, and waited for Sylvester's mark.

''3...2...1...GO!''

The gunshot fired at the same time she said 'go', and Rachel launched herself forward, cutting through the choppy wind. Her legs were striding, lunging forward again and again, feet gripping against the rubbery track, then releasing, and she should have been getting tired but she wasn't. She smiled at herself and swallowed the cool air in huge gulps to keep herself going.

''Not b-bad...Rach.''

Distracted, she glanced sideways and saw Quinn sprinting along side her, sweating all over and taking huge breaths. Her eyes widened for a moment, and then it was too late to do anything.

She didn't have time to register what was happening, but she briefly saw her right leg unconsciously twist and land sideways, and then everything went by in slow-motion. She couldn't stop her body plummetting down towards the floor, and knowingly winced before she felt herself crash down roughly against the surface, and cry out in pain.


	16. Chapter 16: Diamond In The Rough

The gritty maroon surface was pressed hard against Rachel's face, and she clenched her teeth. Her entire body felt grazed. When she tried to inch her right foot upward, it felt heavy, like one million needles were piercing it to the ground. She couldn't move.

"Rachel!"

Quinn's concerned voice seeped into her ears, and the floor vibrated loudly as she heard her bounding closer and closer. Her foot had to be inflamed to be hurting this badly.

"Rachel, are you alright? Can you-"

Rachel let out a howl as she felt Quinn's hand try to shift her leg.

"Don't touch it, do you really wanna hear Berry whine anymore than she usually does Quinn? It's a sprained ankle, for heaven's sake. She'll live."

Sylvester had joined Quinn's side, and Rachel could almost feel her scrutinising gaze rake over her body.

"Berry. If I didn't know any better I'd say this was one of your schemes to get yourself out of detention. Nice try, but I'm not fooled that easily. I've watched pro-soccer players fake injuries better than this."

As if to prove her innocence, Rachel heaved her body upward with her stinging palms, and then slowly tried to move her leg. The pain jabbed mercilessly and she groaned, collapsing onto the floor again.

"Coach, I think it's clear she's twisted her ankle quite badly and-"

"Thanks Quinn, but I wasn't asking for your verification. I see you've become quite a dynamic-duo lately. In fact, nothing would please me more than to see the two of you in action everyday after school right here on this track."

"But Coach, her foot-it's-"

"Not my problem, Doc. See you tomorrow."

Rachel's eyes flashed open, and she craned her neck to see Sylvester walking away from them with a spring in her step. Sometimes Rachel wondered how anyone could be so cruel. It seriously felt like Sylvester had some personal vendetta against her. Wincing, she tried once more to lift herself from the track, but this time she felt warm hands hoop around her arms and help her sit.

"That's it, nice and slow."

She watched Quinn's arms pull her into an almost embrace. When she met her eyes she looked into them with wonder. She felt calm, secure. Gazing at Quinn like this seemed to soothe the pain. Not completely, but it was enough. Enough to forget about Sylvester's cruel words, and enough to put their argument earlier today aside. For now.

"You...didn't have to stick up for me like that. Coach is just like that, I guess."

"Hell hath no fury like Sylvester scorned."

Quinn's eyebrows were raised and she looked like she was smiling, testing the waters even. Rachel couldn't help but smile back despite all her pain. And for the first time, she could feel it. How genuine Quinn's smile was. She wasn't acting. She wasn't doing it to trick her, to lead her down a false path and then betray her at the last minute. No. She was actually playing with her. She was trying to cheer her up. To make her smile too.

"Thank you, Quinn. I-I really appreciate it."

"What are friends for?"

Instantly there was an awkwardness wedged between them, and it was written all over Quinn's face. Rachel could see her concentrated expression, just waiting for her comment to get rebuffed. They weren't friends. They were...Rachel wasn't sure what they were. But she just nodded, and the tension dissipated away just as quickly as it had come.

"By the way, you dropped something."

For some reason, this all felt very much like déjà vu. Rachel watched as Quinn dipped her hand into her pocket and drew out a gold necklace with a star on it. Rachel's hands flew to her neck, feeling for the familiar sensation of cold metal chain against her skin, but it was gone. It must have come loose when she was running.

"May I?"

"I..."

Suddenly Rachel felt her body tremble, and her fever seemed to intensify. Her blood burned and she felt hot, out of breath. But Quinn leaned in anyway, and Rachel was sure that she gulped just as she gingerly manoeuvred her head around her own, and began to delicately tie up the chain. She could feel the warmth of Quinn's body sending little zaps across her shoulder, and when her fingers accidentally danced against the back of her neck she wanted to...she wanted to...

Quinn slowly moved back in front of her, inches from her face. A light pink spread across her cheeks as she grinned, gazing down at the necklace.

"Beautiful. Just like-"

There was a soft buzzing from Quinn's pocket and she sighed, withdrawing her mobile. Her grin dissolved into a neutral expression.

"It's Santana. I was supposed to meet her and Brittany at the Lima Bean."

''Oh...well, you should get going then I suppose.''

Quinn's face twitched, as if she was going to say something, and she opened her mouth, but closed it again. Rachel knew that whatever moment that had just passed between them was long gone, because Quinn's friends were first priority. That made sense. How stupid was she to believe that Quinn would actually help her to get home? In fact, maybe this was still all part of their mind games with her. She just hadn't realised how deep she had gotten, and now it was too late.

For the third time, Rachel gritted her teeth and tried to set herself up on her left leg. She could feel the pain throbbing now, and she shut her eyes in frustration, determined to get up. She would find a way get home by herself.

"What are you doing?"

When she opened her eyes Quinn was hooking one of her arms beneath hers, and the other was firmly clasped around her waist. She felt a thrill bounce through her when Quinn gripped tighter, but she ignored it.

"I-I could ask you the same thing. Actually, I'm surprised you haven't already left yet. I'm sure Brittany and Santana would be getting suspicious as to where you are, and-"

Quinn put a finger to her lips to silence her.

"Do you trust me?"

Something inside Rachel began to flutter.

"N-No...I don't know."

She shook her head in confusion. Quinn just smiled, and the fluttering became quivering.

"Lean into me."

"Why?"

"Just do it."

And then Quinn was supporting her weight, holding her steady so she could hop on her left leg. Rachel stared straight ahead, not daring to glance Quinn's way. She held her breath like her life depended on it, and she wasn't quite sure why, but when she finally breathed out they had arrived at Quinn's car. Still holding her around the waist, Quinn opened the door, and gently pushed her upwards into the seat. The door shut, and a few seconds later Quinn was entering the car from the other side.

"Got your seat belt on?"

But before she could answer Quinn was leaning over, buckling it for her.

"Quinn, I may have a sprained ankle, but I am more than capable of doing up my seat belt without your help. And, besides, you still haven't explained why you're doing this when clearly, you received a text message from Santana asking you to-"

"Rachel! If you say another word I'll remove you from my car!"

Rachel stared at her seriously, but all she got back was a playful grin. She was joking.

The car started up, and Quinn reversed slowly out onto the street. Nobody spoke for a while, and it was then that it hit Rachel. She was a passenger in Quinn Fabray's car. Quinn Fabray, psychotic cheerio from McKinley high. Anything could happen. She could be driving her to the Lima Bean for all she knew, so all three psychotic cheerios could pick on her together.

"Quinn where are you taking me?"

"I thought that was obvious."

Rachel nervously glanced out the window as the car zoomed by the Lima Bean, and just made out the shocked faces of Brittany and Santana who were seated on an outside table. At least she was wrong about option one.

"Quinn. You're starting to scare me now."

"That's good."

Rachel swallowed hard and kept her eyes focused on the passing scenery. She almost felt like she was in a car with a complete stranger. And yet at the same time, she didn't. There were so many questions she wanted to ask, so many things she needed to know.

She let her mind wander.

Today had been such a strange day, especially in English when they had read Romeo and Juliet and she had imagined Quinn as Romeo. She felt her face heat up at the thought. Then Finn had cornered her again, desperate to have a conversation with her that didn't have some form of interruption. But then, Sylvester and Quinn had crawled out of the woodwork, and Quinn-she had said, no suggested, that she didn't want Finn.

Not turning to look at her, Rachel asked the question she had been dying to ask.

"Um, today when I followed you down to the tracks, you um, said that you didn't w-want Finn. But...but that just doesn't make sense seeing as you still love him, and I think you really must love him, especially after how horrible he was you. So, I guess I just-um, I guess I just wanted to know, if you meant it."

"Meant what?"

"W-When you said you didn't want him. Because if you don't want Finn then...then who do you want?"

There was a long pause and the car swerved into the main street that lead to Rachel's house.

"I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."


	17. Chapter 17: Licence To Kill

Normally, being escorted to your home by car is a very safe process, one in which you don't fear for your life. But as Rachel sat pinned to the passenger's seat, she felt anything but safe. To her left was Quinn Fabray, who had just issued her a mild death threat. She made a mental note to never ask Quinn who she wanted ever again. Damp with perspiration, she reached out to open up the glovebox and look for tissues.

''I wouldn't touch that if I were you. That's where I keep my guns.''

Rachel laughed uncertainly and her hand retreated. This had to be a joke. The car veered into her street and Rachel found herself nervously drumming her fingers on her lap. When the car drew to a halt just opposite her house, Rachel began to panic.

''How-''

''I know where you live.''

Alarm bells began ringing in Rachel's head and every possible stalker story flashed before her eyes at lightning speed. She shook her head. Quinn wasn't a stalker. A few seconds later, Quinn was at her door, holding out her hand expectantly. She gripped it hesitantly, and let Quinn lead her to the front porch as she hopped on one foot. It had begun to rain lightly, and the fresh smell of wet grass was wafting in the humid air around them. Rachel looked down at her feet, unsure of what to say.

''Um, thank you...for driving me home, Quinn.''

Quinn shrugged.

''You do know I was kidding about the guns, right?''

''Well...seeing as you did mention you would kill me if you told me who you wanted, it didn't seem like such a big stretch.''

There was a short silence between them, and Rachel stared back at Quinn, determined not to show her how scared she was. She really should have gone inside by now. Her ankle needed an ice pack badly. But there was this strange magnetism to their conversation, and Rachel didn't want to let go of it. Not just yet, anyway. She watched the corners of Quinn's mouth curve upward.

''Would you believe me if I told you that I w-wanted...you? Hypothetically, I mean.''

Rachel felt her eyes widen and her balance became unsteady. She didn't notice the slight crack in Quinn's voice, because something strange was happening inside her-it was the fever. It had to be. She felt her face flush and her heart rate accelerate. Quinn just kept staring at her with those fathomless hazel eyes, and the more Rachel looked at them, the more entranced she became. She took a deep breath and forced herself to keep calm.

Then she said the worst possible thing that could be said.

''B-But why would you want...me? Hypothetically, o-of course. I mean, you...hate me. That's why you've been verbally abusing me and slushying me these past few months, isn't it? You don't do that when you want someone, when you like them, right?''

Quinn was dead silent.

''In fact, half the time you tell me things, I'm not even sure if I can believe them. You...told me that song was about me but I don't even know what that's supposed to mean. Then, then you try and stick up for me when Sylvester shoots me down, and practically carry me to your car...but what I don't understand, Quinn, is what's in it for you? Why are you doing all this? Because if it's just an act, and you're building me up just so you can watch me fall, and laugh at me with Santana and Brittany, then-I stand by my original request where I asked you to stay out of my life.''

All the words had come out in a rush, the heat of the moment, and Rachel regretted every word. This was not how she had wanted the conversation to go. Not at all. The guilt she felt was tremendous. It was as if every word that left her mouth carried poison, but she couldn't stop. Not even when she saw Quinn's smile crumble.

''So...I don't see how what you said would be possible. Even h-hypothetically.''

Rachel inhaled sharply, painfully. No. She didn't mean that. She prayed that she could erase everything she had just said, but it was too late. Quinn had some unreadable expression on her face. Her lips were quivering, and her eyes looked pained. Defeated.

''You're right.''

Trembling lightly, Quinn took one of Rachel's hands in her own, and placed the other one on top. They were warm, gentle, smooth against her own. Rachel shuddered at the contact.

''Quinn...I didn't mean-''

''A person that wants someone should never treat them so...so horribly. I...I'm sorry about what I did at the lockers today. I just thought...I...I thought maybe we could kind of be...f-friends, but...I wish you and Finn the best. I know he can make you happy. He...wants you and he cares about you more than a-anyone else I know, and you deserve to be happy, Rachel. I really mean that. It's...it's not an act. And neither was w-what I sang. That song will be for you...always.''

And then Quinn's hands loosened from hers, and Rachel felt an emptiness deep within her that she couldn't describe. It was like someone had just snatched her soul away in one last breath, one final whisper. Everything about what just happened felt so, so wrong. But she just stood there, glued to the floor, and watched Quinn walking away from her. The car hummed quietly before the engine burst to life, and Quinn was gone.


	18. Chapter 18: Resuscitate

That night, Rachel couldn't sleep. No matter how hard she tried.

It wasn't the fact that her dads were furious because she had sustained yet another injury. Hiram had diagnosed her ankle injury as a mild sprain, and true enough, the pain had dimmed significantly, as had her fever.

It wasn't even the fact that she had revealed (quite reluctantly) to her dads who had driven her home, and was subsequently grounded and asked to relinquish her Funny Girl ticket, which she promised to return when she found it. Accordingly, she thought it would be wise to avoid telling them she'd be doing laps with Quinn tomorrow after school.

It was the fact that she had hurt Quinn.

Every bone in Rachel's body knew that Quinn deserved it. She had cornered her, and only her, isolated her from the rest of her peers for so long, and made her feel like a broken clock. Useless. Outdated. Trash. She should hate her.

And yet, this wasn't the way her dads had raised her. To inflict the same pain on someone who had hurt you. Forgiving someone was another matter entirely, but as Rachel lay there, she thought back to what her dads had told her as a little girl:

"Sweetie, you're going to meet a lot of people in this life. Some will make you laugh. Some will make you cry. And some will change you forever. But I want you to remember this, ok? No matter how upset somebody makes you, no matter how sad you are, how you react is up to you."

"But Dad, what if you really, really hate them?"

"You can treat people exactly the way they treat you, Rach, but in the end, hate only brings hate. The only thing that can set things right, is love. Love never fails."

"But, what if they don't see it? I've never seen love. What does it look like? Dad, what if I never fall in love?"

"Don't worry sweetie, you will. Someday."

Rachel wasn't sure how love could solve all her problems right now. But she promised one thing to herself-she would do her best not to hate Quinn. She would try to forget about everything that had happened, and move on. Everything would be better this way.

She rolled restlessly on top of her bed sheets and felt the morning rays of sunlight trickle through the window, landing softly on her skin. It was already time for school. She groaned tiredly, heaving her body out of bed to get dressed. Today was going to be a long day.

Downstairs at breakfast, her dads sipped their coffee in silence. It was one of those awkward moments where no matter what you said, it came out all wrong.

"Bye Dad, Daddy."

Hiram looked up at her sternly from the newspaper he was reading, and rearranged his black spectacles.

"Remember what we said last night Rach."

She nodded silently, and walked out the door with a heavy heart.

First period was-much to her dismay-English. And that meant only one thing: the continuation of Romeo and Juliet, starring Finn as Romeo, and herself as Juliet. She sighed distractedly and barely payed attention to Finn's enthusiasm:

"More light and light, more dark and dark our woes!"

"Madam!"

Mercedes cut in brusquely.

"Nurse?"

"Your lady mother is coming to your chamber: the day is broke; be wary, look about."

Rachel cast her head from side to side dramatically.

"Then, window, let day in, and let life out."

"Farewell, farewell! One kiss, and I'll descend."

And thank goodness the bell rang for recess at that precise moment, because Finn seemed to be taking the script quite literally. He was about to grab her arm, but Kurt stepped in to intervene.

"H-Hi Finn. Your portrayal of Romeo was just amazing! I'm actually in awe, would you believe it?"

His attention was on Finn but he kept glancing at Rachel, and motioning his head towards the door.

"Oh, thanks Kurt. I guess it's easy to relate to, especially since I think Rachel is-"

Kurt pulled Finn towards him and smiled, mouthing 'go' to Rachel. Finally she understood. He was trying to help her. She smiled and nodded, and carefully slipped out of the room and headed towards her locker, passing the girls' change room on the way.

"...really think I'm gonna believe that, Q? An assignment? There's something you're not telling me. It's about the dwarf, isn't it?"

They were talking about her. Quinn and Santana were talking about her. Rachel fought every instinct within her that told her to stay rooted to the spot, and kept walking.

"No Santana, just leave her out of it, ok? I told you why I couldn't make it yesterday, and if you don't want to believe it then-"

"Defending her, huh? You never did tell me what happened after your little make-out session, Q. I bet things got pretty heated in there-"

Rachel froze.

"You don't know what you're talking about!"

"And you're avoiding the question. Do you think I haven't noticed the way you always seem to pick only on manhands?"

"Don't call her that-"

"There it is again! Ay Dios Mio, Quinn. I don't know why I didn't see this coming."

"Santana, it's not what you think! I-"

"Are you in love with her?"

Rachel felt her fever swing back in full force. Her heart felt like it was going to burst. Everything her Dads said about staying away from Quinn last night, every promise she had made to herself about forgetting this whole situation-everything flew out the window as if it never even existed. It was getting harder and harder to breathe, because...because...

The change room door flew open and out walked Quinn.

"R-Rachel?"


	19. Chapter 19: Love Is Like Oxygen-Pt I

"R-Rachel?"

Quinn's face was twisted into an unusually anxious expression. Her eyes were panicked, pupils darting from side to side. The corridor around them had begun to fill, and people had started to notice. Notice Quinn talking to her. What if they had overheard the conversation too?

"Rachel what are you doing here?"

Rachel felt her lips unstick as she tried to speak. She had to find a way out of this. She really shouldn't have given into her curiosity.

"I-I was just-I mean I didn't-It's not-"

Quinn's hands were suddenly pulling her aside roughly, unexpectedly. She heard a sharp cry, then felt cold wet droplets peppering down her sweater. Following the faint blue trail upward with her eyes, she saw globs of mashed ice-not on her shoulders, but on Quinn's. When she peered up fully at Quinn's face, she felt her breath exhale in astonishment.

Quinn had her eyes closed tightly and her mouth was clammed shut. Down her face trickled a bubblegum slushie, and it was trickling down her cheeks for the world to see.

Rachel glanced around quickly and wished she hadn't.

Every single person was staring, watching on as Quinn Fabray, flawless and unconquerable Quinn Fabray, beautiful and perfect head cheerio Quinn Fabray stood there being humiliated.

"How cute! Quinn Fabgay sticking up for Berry!"

They had heard.

"At least now we now how she really feels about Streisand!"

They had heard it all.

"Looks better on her anyway." Karofsky sneered.

Rachel expected Quinn to say something in return-some antagonistic retort-anything, anything at all to defend herself and put Karofsky and his cronies back in their place.

But nothing came.

The rest of the corridor burst out into fits of frenzied laughter, the roaring growing louder and louder. Rachel swallowed nervously and heard their new chant building in momentum:

"Slu-shie, slu-shie, slu-shie, slu-shie..."

"Alright guys, that's enough, you've taken this joke a bit too f-"

But Santana was silenced when a hurtling mass of green crushed ice slapped her in the face, and her eyes shut on impact. Rachel watched on with trepidation, but Santana's shocked face slowly transformed into a smile.

Everyone else was giggling, pointing and whispering, mocking her, so they didn't notice when she opened her eyes.

"Is that how you wanna play it, you low-life scumbags? Well two can play at that game!"

A second later Santana was weaving through the crowd and had launched herself onto Karofsky, daggers in her eyes.

"Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight!"

Their voices boomed all the way down the corridor, and even Sylvester struggled to be heard in the chanting throng of onlookers.

Jacob-Ben Israel had whipped out his camera, eagerly snapping pictures to store wherever he stored them.

Finn and Puck were clapping their hands together, egging Santana and Karofsky on.

Kurt and Blaine had their hands over their mouths, trying to suppress their horror.

Brittany seemed unusually sad, and was trying to disentangle Santana from the brawl.

Quinn was-where was Quinn?

Rachel's eyes sifted through the crowd for blonde hair, and there-just at the edge, disappearing around the corner, was a red a cheerios uniform. She knew it would be useless to shout after her, every word would just be drowned out by the bellowing choruses of 'fight' all around her.

So she pushed past people instead, desperate not to get squashed, trying to emerge from the now rocking mob.

"Oh look, Gayberry's going to look for her girlfriend!"

She ignored the insults. If there was one good thing about constantly being the target for bullying, it was that you weren't surprised when people hurled insults at you.

When she finally broke free from the masses of bodies, she began to run.

She ran, and it felt like all those times she was running way from Quinn after she had hurt her.

Except this time, she was running towards Quinn, and Quinn was the one who had gotten the rough end of the stick.

Rachel, why are you doing this? Why do you even care? She put you through so much pain and now she's finally getting what she deserves!

Just let it go!

"No-I have to find her!"

Rachel never was very good at listening to her brain.

You do realise that you're breaking your promise to Dad and Daddy again, don't you? You said you'd forget about this mess and move on! Come on, Rachel, she's just dragging you down! She's probably just setting you up, it's an act, Rachel! She's playing you!

"No! This is different!"

Suddenly, Rachel stopped outside the girls' bathroom, which had quickly become a sort of counselling room in recent times, and heard strained whimpering on the other side of the door.

Rachel, don't do it.

You can save yourself right now, it's really not that hard to say no. Just step away from the door, start walking, and don't look back.

"What if I don't want that?"

if you choose to open that door, you'll be doing exactly what she wants. She'll use you, just like she's been using you all this time, and then everything is going to go back to how it used to be. With you at the bottom of the food chain. That's where she wants you, because that's how she is, Rachel. People don't just miraculously change overnight, it's like the story with the scorpion and the fox-

"Stop it!"

You know it's true! You want to carry her across the water, save her from drowning, but guess what she's gonna do, Rachel?

"Stop!"

She's going to bite you. She's going to bite you, and then you'll drown. And you know why? Because it's in her nature. That's the nature of Quinn Fabray.

Rachel blocked out the voices in her head and twisted the doorknob open.


	20. Chapter 20: Love Is Like Oxygen-Pt II

**A/N: To each and every dear reader out there who takes a gander at this story, and especially all those lovely incognito guest reviewers, THANK YOU. Your reviews motivate me to go on, and I'm always curious to hear what you're all thinking. Sometimes I find the comments so fascinating, because they literally make me see everything from a perspective I never imagined, so I'm grateful for that d^^b Also I appreciate that some readers are a bit divided about whether Quinn/Rachel should be together, and to that I say: keep reading:) Who knows? You might change your mind;) See you all soon x**

* * *

Everybody has secrets, and they're usually secrets for a reason. For instance, if you found out that your mother was in fact a prominent underworld figure, you would probably be very shocked. Or, if your biggest adversary somehow discovered (along with the rest of the student population) that you were secretly in love with them, they might not ever be able to see you in the same way ever again.

Quinn Fabray had a very big secret, one that she had managed to keep under lock and key quite successfully for a very long time. Until now, that is.

She sat down on the toilet seat with the lid down, guarded by the locked cubicle door, and let all her tears pour out one by one.

For so long, she had dominated the halls of McKinley High with ease, putting everyone else down so she could lift herself up, so she could forget about the one part of her that was inadequate, unworthy of love, the 'disgusting' part of her, as her parents would like to say.

"Those gays and lesbians are an abomination, Judy. They're disgusting, and I don't want this family to have anything to do with them. Especially that Jewish diva wannabe with the gay fathers. Quinn, you are not to socialise with people like that, understand? Heaven forbid, they might rub it off onto you."

Quinn had sat there in silence, time and time again, shoving down whatever anxiety that lived permanently within her. If she pretended like it didn't exist, then it didn't.

High School for her was like one big performance. If she was popular enough, and pretty enough, and had the quarterback of the football team as her boyfriend, then her life would be perfect. Her parents would be proud. Other students would admire her, or be intimidated by her. Teachers would praise her. She would be the perfect little girl that everyone wanted her to be.

But somewhere along the line, the real Quinn got lost.

In the beginning, leading a double life was easy. Quinn slipped into her second skin without difficulty, and she got so good at playing the part that not a single person called her bluff. Sometimes, even she believed it. She had even made friends with the other two most popular cheerleaders in the school, Santana and Brittany. She genuinely believed that she had managed to get rid of whatever was wrong with her. And now, finally, after overcoming this obstacle, she could begin her real life.

But as time went on, problems had begun to emerge. Problems she had never foreseen in her plan. And the biggest problem of them all, was a girl called Rachel Berry. Quinn remembered the first time she met her, when she was wearing one of those revolting argyle sweaters that just screamed 'geek'. She remembered how Rachel had once invited her over, excited for Quinn to meet her dads.

Dads?

Quinn had laughed nervously, and went home that night to ask for her parents' permission to go over.

"Quinnie, dear, you heard what your father said, and I'm afraid it's true. We just can't have you lowering yourself like that. This Rachel girl, she doesn't...like you, does she?"

Quinn felt sick as the words exited her mother's mouth.

"I will not have this conversation in my house! Not now, not ever! We are going to eat the rest of our dinner in silence, without mentioning this-this sinful lifestyle-ever again! Whatever abuse they get, they deserve it! It's their choice!"

That night was one of the most confusing nights in Quinn's young life. She went to sleep, tight with anxiety and unsure why. Something her dad had said flipped a switch inside her. It made her uncomfortable, and she swallowed it down as far as it would go, to drown it out completely.

The next day at school, she was met with Rachel Berry's beaming face, silently asking whether Quinn had gotten her parents' approval. Rachel's face drooped when Quinn shook her head. It made it that much harder to say no to her, but she knew that her parents would kill her if she said yes.

Quinn's rejection never stopped Rachel from asking her again, however, or spending time together at school. And the more she got to know this Rachel, the more she found she was drawn to her in a way she couldn't put into words.

She was happy when Rachel was happy. She was sad when Rachel would frown. She even ended up adoring her hideous sweaters.

And then, she started noticing other things about her.

Like the soft cheeks she wanted to hold in her hand so badly, or the heavenly voice that catapulted her skyward into a land of bliss whenever she heard it, and those beautiful sparkling brown eyes that just glowed with happiness whenever Rachel saw her.

No one else made her feel this way, whatever this feeling was.

There were so many things she wanted to say to Rachel, to tell her just how happy she was to be her...friend. But she didn't know how.

That's when the letters began.

A very wise person once said that sometimes, we only get to feel certain things once in our lifetime. Feelings are special, so we should write them all down, and keep them. And that's exactly what Quinn did. She penned tens, then hundreds of letters about Rachel, about how Rachel made her feel.

Rachel made her heart drum beat like a marching band, made her hear fireworks that no one else seemed to hear, made the sun come out on an impossibly rainy day...this feeling...it couldn't be-

"Quinnie, you've been smiling ever since you got home. Did something good happen at school?"

Quinn remembered the conversation like it was yesterday.

"Could it be that my little Quinnie has a crush?"

Quinn smiled mischievously, and her heart thudded louder at the question.

"Mom...how do you know you like someone?"

"I knew it! Oh sweetie, I'm so happy for you. But you still seem a little bit unsure about it. Can I ask you some questions?"

Quinn nodded.

"Right. Do you think about them a lot?"

"Yes."

"And, do you feel happy whenever you're around them?"

"Yes."

"Ok, finally-do you want to spend all your time with just them and nobody else?

Quinn nodded, returning Judy's grin.

"Well, I think you have your first real crush! Congratulations! Now, who's the lucky boy?"

Quinn went rigid and choked on the words in her throat.

"Oh, are you alright? Let me get you some water."

When she watched her mom slink off into the kitchen, she felt ill. This couldn't be happening. Not to her. It was some bad dream that would go away by tomorrow. She deliberately sculled the water, keeping a steady gaze on her mother.

"F-Finn Hudson. He's the quarterback of the football team."

Judy pulled her into a hug.

"Oh Quinnie, I'm so proud of you. How could anybody not want a beautiful girl like you? I can't wait to meet him!"

That night, Quinn tore apart every single letter she had written about Rachel. Her fingers shook as she divided each word, each sentence she had taken so long to compose. Her feelings were rubbish, and that's where they belonged. In the trash.

At school, she ignored Rachel, but she wouldn't go away. Her stupid laugh that made Quinn feel like fainting with happiness, her shiny gold star necklace that swayed against her smooth neck, her soft and dainty hands that would grab Quinn's arm so playfully...Quinn couldn't take it anymore.

"Don't touch me, manhands."

At first, Rachel looked shocked, and Quinn felt her heart shatter. She had to keep going now that she had started.

"What are you looking at, treasure trail?"

It hurt Quinn to say the words, but what hurt her more was how hard Rachel had tried to figure out what she had done wrong before finally giving up.

Ever since that day, Quinn's life had become simple. Her routine was to go to school, be the perfect cheerleader everyone expected her to be, do pretend lovey-dovey couple stuff with Finn...and pick on Rachel.

Things were comfortable, and running according to plan until that one day in the bathroom. She had tried to laugh like usual when Santana and Brittany attempted to apply her white face paint on Rachel, but it was resurfacing. The heart shattering pain she felt when she had hurt Rachel for the first time.

Before she knew it, she was gripping Rachel tightly to her, just hoping, praying that she could see through all her lies, see how sorry she truly was. She had wanted to explain everything to her that day. To tell her exactly how beautiful she was, but it was too late. She cursed herself for her momentary weakness, but still, she felt the need to slip a final letter in Rachel's locker. It would be the last time, she would let go of her once and for all. She promised.

But then, she had seen Rachel kissing Finn, and her heart broke all over again-just not for her now ex-boyfriend.

When Rachel forgot the letter in the library, Quinn had taken it back, and she held it now, absentmindedly tearing it at the edges.

The door to the bathroom was ajar, but Quinn didn't hear it open above her sobs.

Everything pulsed through her brain in short, sharp flashes now.

Rachel was killing her, slowly and purposely, ruining the illusion she had worked so hard at to maintain. She tried desperately to get Rachel to admit she loved Finn, so she could finally let her stab her heart till all the love just bled out of her and left her winded.

But Rachel had told her she had dreamt not of Finn, but her...and then denied it.

She saw herself revealing who her glee performance was really about.

Then she was lying to Rachel about extra-laps, just to get her away from him.

She could see her hand interlocked with Rachel's, struggling to keep her calm exterior as she lead her down to the tracks.

Her hands were finally on Rachel's smooth tanned legs, and she was using the explanation of cheerio's warm up stretching as an excuse to touch her.

Rachel was falling on the track, and she was there, hating herself for her indecision about whether or not she should help her, but finally giving in.

She was inches from her on her porch, heart beating fast, testing to see if Rachel was horrified by the mock-suggestion that she wanted her.

Her tears stung her face like acid as she drove away, mentally slapping herself for even trying to open up like that.

And finally, it had all come undone today when Santana had surprised her with the accuracy of her observations.

The show was all over.

"Quinn, are you alright?"

It wasn't a voice she expected to hear, but at the same time she didn't dread it. Quinn held her breath so Rachel wouldn't hear her crying, and stared at the back of the toilet door determinedly.

"Are you crying?"

Why was she even here? If it were Quinn in her position, she would have bolted all the way to the middle east and disguised herself as a local merchant. That was probably the furthest you could get from Lima geographically.

"It's gonna be ok. You know that? I'm not going anywhere."

"Rachel...what are you doing here?"

Quinn could hear the fragility in her own voice. She wasn't ready for this. She would never be ready.

"I...don't know, Quinn. But...you're in trouble, and I just happen to believe that you should help people when they're in trouble."

Quinn remained silent. She didn't trust herself to say anything that she would regret later on.

"I don't hate you, Quinn."

Her lips twitched, and the words came out involuntarily.

"Why not?"

There was a long pause, and the air in the room seemed to grow heavy, as if it had been drained of oxygen.

"Because...I think that you only treated me the way you did to meet other people's expectations...and that was before you knew what it felt like to be me. An outsider."

Quinn could feel her hands trembling, balling up into tight fists of pure shame, indignation that Rachel was here, telling her things she didn't deserve to hear.

"I don't know if I can ever forgive you for what you did, but...but I just want you to know that you're not alone. I don't want you to feel the same way I did, when I went home crying each day, and I felt like I couldn't talk to anybody about it because they would think it was stupid, because you told me not to."

Quinn felt herself grimace at Rachel's words. They cut deep into her already open wounds, but she held-out. She was hearing the truth.

"I-I just want you to know that, if you need someone to talk to, I'm here. Whatever it is, you can tell me."

Suddenly Quinn felt her hands shoot out towards the door, trembling against the lock. The door swung open to reveal Rachel, standing there before her, just gazing at her with the most sincere expression she had ever seen in her entire life.

And then Quinn's arms were sliding around Rachel's waist, holding her tight against her, and she breathed out with a shudder:

"Never let me go."


	21. Chapter 21: You Weren't In Love With Me

Quinn stood there, clinging to Rachel like she was the last person on earth, and felt her tears slowly drip down into the folds of her argyle sweater. She was soaking it, ruining it, that hideously adorable pattern that said Rachel Berry all over it.

She was about to pull away, certain that Rachel would push her off at any moment, disgusted by her actions. But all she felt were Rachel's arms encircling around her waist, holding on to her tightly.

"It's alright."

Quinn broke out into a sob, trembling against Rachel's shoulder, and now she was hushing her. Whispering words of comfort into her ear and soothing the pain, but her voice was low and shaky.

"C-Crying doesn't suit you, anyway. I know that it probably feels like your life is over, that everybody hates you after what just happened but...I want you to be happy. Just try. You're...you're a very pretty girl, Quinn. P-Prettiest girl I've ever met, but...you're a lot more than that. And no matter what happens, no matter what everybody else thinks of you, you're still you."

Quinn pulled away and felt her mouth open unexpectedly, a foreign sound coming out. She was crying loudly.

"N-No, Rachel, you don't understand, I'm n-not me. This cant be me. No one would ever love this-this thing that I am, and I...I just want to go back, start all over again. I want to go back to when I was a little girl and not make this stupid mistake with my life, because then I'd finally be happy. What I am now? What I'm becoming? It's...it's disgusting!"

"No Quinn it isn-"

"Yes it is! I'm a cheerleader! I'm supposed to be dating Finn Hudson, the quarterback of McKinley High! I'm supposed to graduate with a smile on my face, make my parents proud, make them happy, and then I'm supposed to get married to Finn, and make him happy too! I'm supposed to live that life, the life I was always meant to live. But you know what I keep doing, Rachel? I keep on ruining it. I keep on stuffing it all up for everybody, and I hate it. I hate this person I've become. I can't be the person that everyone wants me to be, and it's making me sick. Rachel, I'm supposed to love Finn but I don't, at least not the way I should...and now...everybody knows why! Nobody could ever love me. Nobody. Not the way I am now."

Quinn felt Rachel's arms slide upwards so they gripped onto her shoulders as she watched her through tear stained eyes of her own.

"Q-Quinn, don't say that."

She had started crying too, soundlessly, silently. Quinn just wanted to brush it all away, dry her eyes and never hurt her again. She had promised her just that. But she couldn't stop the words from gushing out.

"It's t-true, Rachel. Not even Santana and Brittany would ever look at me the same way now...they saw me driving you home the other day and...I'm, I'm just horrible. I'm a monster...there's nothing to love about me. Nothing."

There was a long pause, and Quinn felt her heart become tense when Rachel spoke again.

"Yes...there is."

Quinn's eyes widened as she felt Rachel's hand position itself over her cheek, softly stroking her skin. What was happening?

"There's so much to love about you, Quinn Fabray. So, so much. But you've just been hiding it away all this time, and the world hasn't got to see it yet. I promise you Quinn, that one day, somebody out there will love you just for you, the way that you're meant to be loved, ok? That's what my dads told me, that love never fails. So you can't give up. I'm not allowing it."

Where on earth did that come from?

Now it felt like like the air in the room had been replaced by noxious gases from Venus, and Quinn desperately tried to clear her mind from all the confusing thoughts that were rushing through it. You see, when you love someone, as I'm sure you all know, it is extremely easy to misconstrue signs and end up believing that person likes you in return. Sadly, this occurs far more often than it should, and for Quinn, now wasn't an exception.

"I..." Quinn scrunched the letter in her hand just a little bit more.

"Rachel, why are you doing this? Why are you helping me?"

If it was possible, Rachel leaned in closer, seemingly unaware that she was doing so, until Quinn felt her warm breath whoosh on her face and her thoughts became fuzzy all over again.

"Because, Quinn. You asked me to never let you go, and...I won't. I won't ever let you go. Because, when Rachel Berry makes a promise, she means it."

Quinn's breathing became frenzied, not out of pain or anxiety, but excitement. She knew that feeling this way was practically illegal, especially since the probability Rachel felt the same about her was about as likely as the probability Sue Sylvester would decide to marry Mr. Schue and invite all the glee club as guests to the wedding but...but Rachel wasn't moving. Not an inch. She just kept on gazing fixedly into her eyes, pleading, asking her for something that Quinn knew she wasn't allowed to give. Her feelings were unrequited, and that's how it was going to stay.

But then, the strangest thing happened.

Rachel kept leaning in closer, and Quinn felt the tip of her nose brush against her cheek, sending mini zaps across her skin, and then her lips were softly pressing against her cheek too.

All too soon, Rachel was pulling away, her hand shifting off her face. She was staring at the floor between them and biting her lip.

No Quinn, don't over-analyse the situation. Calm down. Girls kiss their friends all the time. She doesn't like you. She does not like you. Why are you even thinking this!?

"That p-paper in your hand Quinn...could I see it?"

Both Quinn and Rachel jumped at the sound of the door suddenly slamming open to reveal a snarling rainbow-slushie covered Sylvester glaring at them. She was fuming.

"Quinn. Get out of this clinic for psych patients and get to class. I don't know who called the zoo, but all the jungle animals are gone now, thank God. I'll talk to you about this clear and shameful attempt to imitate the Mean Girls cast at the tracks. Berry, I'm so sick of finding you whimpering in here that I've decided to leave you just where you are. I was going to send in a resume to Kleenex on your behalf but based on the amount of crying you do, I think they'd go broke."

Sylvester slammed the door on her way out, and Quinn felt the awkwardness fill up the room around them. Rachel's gaze hadn't shifted from the paper in Quinn's hand.

"This? I-It's nothing important. I'm throwing it in the bin, see?"

Quinn stepped towards the corner and fully scrunched the letter up into a tight ball, praying that no one would open it ever again, and watched it fall into the litter below. There was no way Rachel would have remembered that she left it behind in the library.

"A-Anyway, I better be going. I...I'll see you later on anyway."

Stop repeating yourself Quinn, you sound like an idiot!

Quinn's hand grasped the doorknob and began to twist it nervously, hoping Rachel wouldn't say anything in response.

"Quinn?"

Crap. Crap crap crap.

"Did you write it?"

Quinn went pale. And then, she wanted to turn around. She wanted so badly to see exactly what Rachel's face looked like at this moment. But she knew that even if she did, and even if she told her the truth, that it wouldn't change anything. Rachel had risked it all just by coming to help her and giving her a chance, instead of leaving her to suffer like she knew she deserved. But this was as good as it was going to get. Rachel would never want her.

"Quinn...I need to know. Please, please don't lie to me anymore."

She opened the door, taking a step out of the bathroom, and breathed out deeply. She really did owe it to her. Maybe, she had to stop putting herself first all the time and start thinking about other people's feelings too, even if they couldn't return her own. And maybe this was the best time to start. She smiled as she walked away, because honesty coming from her mouth sounded so good.

"Yes."


	22. Chapter 22: Foolish Games

They were stuck deep in the next act of Romeo and Juliet, but Quinn could hear the whispering in the background. She buried her face in her palms and tried to block it all out, because she knew it was about her.

"Did you hear about Quinn? Oh my God, oh my God, I bet she wishes she was in Rachel's class so they could read this part together!"

"That's gross, I can't believe she's gay...and she likes that dork Berry, that's even more gross."

"I think it's hot dude!"

"You're gross!"

She cringed. There was more snickering, and then Quinn felt a small hard prick on her back. She whipped her head around and her eyes trailed down to a paper ball on the floor just next to her. A bunch of suspicious looking guys watched her, grins on their faces. She frowned and turned back to face the front.

She was supposed to be concentrating on the script, but somehow, now that everyone knew her secret, everything had changed for the worse.

"Farewell! I will omit no opportunity that may convey my greetings, love, to thee."

Sam declared to Lauren, who was nailing it as Juliet:

"O think'st thou we shall ever meet again?"

"O Rachel, my heart wilt die if we do not!"

Karofsky suddenly piped up, and the class roared with laughter. Quinn buried her head in shame once more, and the teacher, who was one of those types that didn't control the class easily, didn't offer to help.

"I doubt it not, and all these woes shall serve for sweet discourses in our time to come."

Gone was the armour of invincibility she had in her possession as head cheerio, along with the control she exercised over the other students. They weren't afraid of her anymore, and that made Quinn scared, even if it was just a little. She hadn't bothered to clean the slushie stain off her cheerios outfit, and it was almost as if it signified just how ordinary she had become. Because now, that's all she was. Ordinary. She was just another ordinary girl, another brick in the wall.

"O God, I have an ill-divining soul! Methinks I see thee, now thou art below, as one dead in the bottom of a tomb. Either my eyesight fails, or thou look'st pale."

What did other kids feel like being so ordinary? So defenseless, and vulnerable to being picked on all the time? Finally, she understood what Rachel must have felt like all this time, and she sighed painfully. She wondered what Rachel thought of her now, what she thought of her now that she knew the letter was from her.

"And trust me, love. In my eye, so do you. Dry sorrow drinks our blood, adieu, adieu!"

The lunch bell rang and Quinn gathered her books to leave, silently hoping that she would reach her locker unscathed.

"Where do you think you're going, Fabgay?"

Her body tensed, but she clung tighter to her books and walked out the door, pretending she hadn't noticed the voice.

Loud footsteps thudded after her, and she quickened her pace, but there was a rough hand squeezing her shoulder tightly and she spun around finally to face Karofsky. He grinned at her maliciously, and she felt more uncomfortable than she had in a very long time.

"I said, where do you think you're going, Fabgay?"

Any students passing in the hall knew better than to get involved, especially since what had happened during recess, so they politely pretended what was happening didn't exist. His voice was cold, commanding. Quinn felt the anxiety slowly building up inside her, but she did her best to keep her composure and retain some of her former self.

"Leave me alone, Karofsky. I was just-"

"Taking a little trip with me to the boys change room?"

Quinn's eyes shrank and before she knew it, she was being dragged against her will down the corridor.

"L-Leave me alone. Now.""

She stuttered as he kept an iron grip on her and kept forcing her towards the door, which was now just inches away.

"We thought we could all have a little fun with you. How does that sound?"

Suddenly, this didn't seem like just some game anymore.

"You think you're gay huh? Well, let's just see how true that is."

Quinn felt her body seize up and she flailed helplessly against the grip Karofsky held her in. Anything she tried was useless. He was practically leaving red marks on her arms as he pushed her onto the bench in the middle of the room and held her there.

"Oh and if you scream, Fabgay, we'll just make it worse for you. So don't even think about it."

Fear pulsed throughout her and she felt her arms shaking as some of Karofsky's mates walked into the room. They were all edging closer, and one of them was playing with her hair now, lifting the golden strands and running them through his fingers.

"Such a waste, Quinn. Such a waste..."

Now he was stroking her cheek, and trailing his index finger down her neck, lower and lower till it crossed over her chest.

"Santana! Brittany! H-Help, get me the hell out of her-"

Karofsky smothered her mouth with his large hand, stifling her completely.

"Shut it, Fabgay."

Quinn's muffled cries filled his hot and sweaty palm, and she felt her skirt being lifted up slowly, broad hands smoothing over her legs, and laughs echoing against the walls. Dark tears began to trickle down her face, as she struggled to get free in vain.

"How does it feel like to hit rock bottom, Quinnie? I'm sure your parents would be so proud of you right now."

He was sneering at her. That bastard was sneering at her.

Quinn shut her eyes and tried to stop herself from convulsing uncontrollably, ignoring the fact that Karofsky had unwittingly called her what her mother did.

Perhaps, this was her payback.

This was how karma was coming to get her for all those atrocious things she had said and done to every other kid, and especially Rachel—and she wasn't getting out of it.

If there really was a God out there, Quinn needed him, and she needed him right now. She was sorry, so very sorry. She would give anything, absolutely anything, to get out of this situation.

Even if it meant giving up the one thing she wanted the most.

She was afraid, but for the first time in her life, she was afraid for someone else more.

So she decided that she would make a pact. One with God, and one with herself.

God, I know I deserve this. Rachel should have never met someone who made her life a living hell...someone like me. I'm a bully. That's all I am. A bully. And now, justice is finally being served. I'm getting it all back. I...don't deserve her. I never will. I don't deserve someone who comes to help me after I made them suffer for so long...I don't deserve that kindness.

But, I promise you this. If you help me now, I'll change. I'll do everything I can to change. And if that means giving her up, and allowing her to be what she's always meant to be...a star, I'll do it. Maybe I wasn't supposed to be with her, maybe I can never have that wish. But that's ok. As long as you keep her safe, I'll do anything. I promise.

And in one terrifying moment, she felt rough hands gripping on the material beneath her skirt, and she was about to let the last strand of hope go.

"STOP RIGHT THERE!"

Everything went by so quickly it was impossible to process, but all of a sudden Sylvester had barged into the room and was ripping away Karofsky and the boys, screaming into their faces without an ounce of political correctness. There was no time for that. She lunged at them, batting their arms away and ordering them out of the room where she gave them a long dressing down before she re-entered.

"Quinn. What are you doing here?"

Quinn was petrified, and could barely lift herself up on the bench.

"I...Karofsky, he..."

"It's clear what Karofsky and his hormone-enraged minions were about to do Quinn, but that's not what I was asking you. What in God's name possessed you to come here, and engage in less than respectable behaviour like this? Do you really think I want my cheerios to be carrying buns in the oven while they're leaping in the air at sectionals?"

"N-No...it isn't w-what it looked like, I didn't mean for it to happen, it just..."

Quinn gazed at her, tears staining her eyes. She was still trying to recover and stop her arms and lips from trembling. She watched as Sylvester came to sit down by her side, and in what was a rare display of affection, slowly take her hands in hers. She was looking at her and shaking her head, but not in disappointment.

"Quinn, I know what it's like to be sixteen and get led astray, but if they were forcing you to do anything unsavoury, anything at all like that, you do realise that they'll be expelled no questions asked. Is that what was happening? I need an honest answer here, Quinn."

Quinn shook her head nervously, and Sylvester's eyes narrowed as she tried to read deeper into her expression, seemingly trying to root out any lies buried beneath the surface.

"If I didn't know you any better, I'd say you were lying. And judging by those red marks that are decorating your elbows, I'd say that those worthless piles of trash were trying to have their way with you. Just count your lucky stars that Berry heard what was going on in here and decided to come knocking on my door."

Berry. It was Rachel who had stepped in to help her yet again. Rachel Berry.

Sylvester stood and ruffled her hair as she sighed heavily.

"See you at the tracks, Q."

When she exited from the doorway, Quinn raised herself fully and heaved up onto her legs, smoothing out her skirt. She tried to wash out the memories of those filthy hands that had touched her beneath it, and then, the guilt hit her.

It was Rachel who had intervened, Rachel who had been the knight in white shining armour. She glanced around from side to side, but she was nowhere to be seen.

She couldn't understand it. It was like some cruel joke where no matter how hard she tried to stay away from her, she kept resurfacing in her life.

And now, it was especially cruel, because she had just begun to get closer to her, but she would have to give it all up. She had promised.

She had promised that she would stay away and let her follow her own dreams, no matter how much it broke her heart. Because any time Quinn got too close, she ruined Rachel too. She wasn't good for her. Somehow, it almost felt like Romeo and Juliet's situation, where they could never be together, regardless of how much they wanted to be.

The only difference, Quinn thought sadly, was that this situation was a very one-sided one.

Quinn sighed and broke out into a pace until she reached the cafeteria, where she spotted Santana and Brittany staring at her from across the room.

"Come and sit with us."

Quinn watched Santana mouthing out the words and hesitantly began to step closer. She pulled out a chair and slid into it, stealing quick glances at them.

"So..."

It was Santana's way of starting off any awkward conversation and Quinn could recognise it from a mile away. She kept her voice low, even though the cafeteria was flooded with shouting and laughter that made it impossible to hear what they were discussing.

"Why didn't you tell me, Q? I thought we were all in this together, you know, like not keeping stuff from each other."

''Yeah.''

Brittany chimed in for good measure.

''I...I didn't know how to say it. It's not exactly the easiest thing in the world to tell someone, and especially your friends...who are both girls. It's not like I could have come up to you and said I'm...I'm...''

''Gay. You can say it. We don't bite.''

Quinn hadn't expected this. On the contrary, she had expected both of them to ditch her and maybe even start using the white face paint on her this time. But instead, they just looked at her expectantly. They weren't judging. They were even looking at her like she was still the old Quinn Fabray, and nothing had changed. Quinn couldn't help the small tear that fell from her eye.

''Yeah, unless you taste good.''

Brittany added for good measure, but this time, Santana blushed furiously and elbowed her hard in the ribs. Quinn raised her eyebrows in surprise.

''We've been going out for two months now.''

Brittany continued, ignoring Santana.

Quinn's mouth formed a perfect letter o and her hands flew up, clasping around her mouth tightly. Santana was already reaching across the table, ready to dislodge Quinn's arms, and say ''What?'' so they could have a laugh about it. But she noticed Quinn flinch as their arms touched. Santana frowned, and when her eyes landed on the red finger marks on Quinn's elbow, she went haywire.

"Q. What's that?"

"It's nothing important, I dese-"

"Like hell it isn't! Spill the beans or I'm gonna go and maim the dwarf!"

"She didn't do anything! I swear, she's got nothing to do with this!"

"Who did it then?"

Quinn swallowed loudly before whispering the name.

"Karofsky."

Santana pushed her chair back and rolled up her sleeves determinedly.

"I'm gonna kill that bastard. What in the Sylvester does he think he's trying to pull? Q, what did he do to you? What the hell did he do to you!?"

"H-He took me to the boys bathroom a-and...h-his friends started t-touching me...they said I...was a waste...that they were going to see if I was really...g-g..."

"WHAT!? WHAT THE HELL, Q! Those jerks deserve to die!"

A few heads turned, but Santana just glared at them and they spun their heads back around in a flash.

"N-No Santana, wait, Coach Sylvester already punished them all so please, just drop it! P-Please!"

Santana smirked.

"Do you honestly think they're gonna stop now that they've started? Q, that gigantic closet case isn't gonna stop hounding you till he gets what he wants, and that's to make you suffer. This isn't just some game, Q."

Quinn's eyes widened with surprise.

"Oh, don't look so shocked, Q. I'm a closet lesbian and a judgmental bitch, which means one thing. I have awesome gaydar."

Brittany nodded her approval.

"It's true. Yesterday we saw him checking out Kurt's a-"

"Ok Brittany, we'll save this for another time." Santana cut in, "Anyway, I'm just warning you Q, not everyone comes out the same way. Some people don't even realise what's going on, and then when they do, all hell breaks loose. He's clinging tight to his homophobic shield right now, but the glue's unsticking. I just don't want you to be in the way when it cracks, alright? You're gonna stick with us like your life depended on it. Got it?"

Quinn nodded, and Santana sat down again, somewhat more relieved that Quinn was listening to her now. Quinn felt belittled, frightened and fragile, but having Santana and Brittany support her like this was just what she needed.

"So...manhands. I never would have believed it."

"Rachel."

Quinn corrected softly.

"Ra-chel..." Santana pronounced each syllable slowly, as if she was learning a new word in a foreign language. "God, that sounds so weird coming out of my mouth."

Brittany giggled before speaking up.

''Q...I feel really bad about the way we treated Rachel. I think we should make it up to her.''

''Oh no, count me out of it. There's no way I'm gonna apologise to the dw- to Ra-chel.''

Quinn crossed her arms and frowned at Santana, before her eyes flickered across the room and she caught sight of Rachel.

Rachel sitting next to Finn.

Rachel smiling at one of his lame jokes, as he grinned back at her, proud of himself.

Rachel falling in love with him.

No, no, no.

Quinn grimaced and returned her gaze to Santana and Brittany. This was the price she had to pay. If it meant seeing Rachel happy, she would do it. No matter how much it hurt.

''Love stinks, huh.''

Santana said, and all Quinn could do was nod sadly.

* * *

The rest of the day passed by unremarkably, except when Quinn shared any classes with Karofsky, the scowl visible on his face.

The final bell rang, and Quinn was rushing to her locker to get her bag, so she could get down to the tracks before Rachel did. Then she could avoid their interactions for just a little bit longer. Things would be easier that way.

''Quinn!''

She sighed as she shut her locker in defeat. God really had it in for her.

''Quinn, aren't you waiting for me?''

Rachel was staring at her with pleading brown eyes, huffing, flushed and out of breath. She had her hair tied back in a ponytail and she looked adorable. Quinn fought hard not to cry.

''Of course I am. Ready to go?''

Rachel's features morphed into a small smile.

''Yep.''

They began to walk down to the tracks, side by side, so close and yet so far away.

''Quinn...I know it's none of my business, but...are you alright? I heard you calling out for Brittany and Santana from the boys' change room. What were you doing in there?''

Quinn struggled, but only momentarily. There was no way she could drag Rachel into any of this.

"Nothing, K-Karofsky just needed to talk to me about...something."

Rachel stopped, dead in her tracks.

"Quinn, I was serious when I said I don't want you to lie to me anymore."

"What makes you think I'm lying, Rachel?"

Rachel stepped closer, and Quinn felt her breathing constrict.

"Because you stuttered when you said his name? Because you're as pale as a ghost, and-why do you keep stepping away from me?"

Quinn looked down at her shoes, desperately searching for a way to change the topic.

"I'm glad you and Finn are so happy together. He really cares about you."

Rachel stomped her feet furiously and within seconds her hands had found their way to Quinn's shoulders, forcing her to look into her eyes.

"Are you even listening to what I'm saying? Quinn, if you're in trouble, I want to be there to help you. But I can't help you if you don't tell me what's going on. Sylvester told me to leave before she went in to get you, so I listened to her. But it doesn't mean I don't want to know what happened."

Quinn was losing it. She was an inch away from erupting in anger, or...doing something far more regrettable.

"Why do you care?"

She had said it in her iciest tone, one that usually sent the whole team of jocks packing, but for some reason Rachel seemed immune.

"Because I want to care. Is that not ok with you? And honestly, why do you keep bringing Finn back into all of this? I've told you before Quinn, and I'll say it again. My romantic intentions towards him are-to put it politely-quite nonexistent."

"You two seemed pretty friendly at lunch."

Quinn groaned at her stupidity. She was seething with jealousy, and Rachel just kept drawing it out of her.

Rachel leaned in until her face was an inch from Quinn's, once again seemingly oblivious to the fact she was doing so, and Quinn felt her body go rigid.

"I don't like him."

Quinn's eyes dilated in surprise at their sudden proximity. She was going down, and she knew it.

"Why not?"

A faint blush suddenly crept over Rachel's cheeks.

That was the final straw.

Quinn could feel herself growing hot and flustered. But she held her breath, and did her best to maintain a somewhat angry expression, even though on the inside she was dying.

"Alrighty, alrighty! I hope you ladies have enough manpower in you to make a heat without toppling over like a domino this time!"

Quinn immediately turned and began to jog towards the starting line to warm up, silently berating herself for allowing the situation to escalate so quickly.

She could feel Rachel's eyes on her, but she was determined to keep to her promise.

She wasn't going to stuff it up this time.

She stretched out her legs, reaching down all the way to her toes with her hands.

"Quinn...what's wrong with your arms?"

Ignore it Quinn, you're supposed to be staying away from her.

"Q-Quinn, they're all red, did something happen?"

Like I said before, if you know what's good for you, you'll keep your eyes focused on the floor and-

"Oh my God, Quinn, was Karofsky hurting you? Quinn...he didn't try to-"

And all of a sudden, Quinn felt cold fingers gently stroking her arm.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!"

She looked up to see Rachel recoiling in horror, and the pang of guilt slapped her hard.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that, I just..."

But Rachel had positioned herself on the starting block, averting her gaze from Quinn completely.

"Rachel, please, look at me."

Quinn begged as she took her place a lane away from her.

"3...2...1...GO!"

And then they were running, thrusting their bodies against the wind, wheezing and sucking in all the air they could.

Running is one of those truly beautiful things in life, because when you run, you feel free. It's sort of like you're letting your soul take flight, and you feel every emotion just a little bit more intensely. But no matter how hard she tried, Quinn couldn't feel free. She couldn't run away from all her problems because as soon as her legs stopped moving, all her problems would just come back.

They ran until they were out of breath, bending over the tracks and collapsing onto the grass.

"Not bad Berry, I'm impressed you didn't sprain your other leg. Quinn."

Sylvester's voice faded out, and then her footsteps grew fainter and fainter, until she was gone.

Quinn dared to look at Rachel, who was a few feet away from her.

"Rachel, about before, I-"

"Stop talking."

"Rachel, I-"

"No Quinn, don't. I've finally understood you now. I keep on telling myself that if I try to see past this mask you keep hiding behind, I'll see the real you. Because somewhere deep inside you, I thought you wanted that. But I can see it nice and clear now, Quinn. You think it's all a game, writing people notes, pretending to feel things for them, and then when they ask you to trust them, you know what you do? You go and crawl in a hole to hide all your feelings."

"Please Rachel, you don't understand!"

"I don't understand? You don't understand. I've done everything in my power to help you, Quinn Fabray. I've even disobeyed my dads by coming here to do laps with you after school. For some stupid reason I thought that meant something to you, but maybe that was just my stupid brain overthinking things like always. You know what? Maybe I will go out with Finn. He asked me again, would you believe it? I'm tired of being there for everybody else while I put my own life on hold. Maybe I've just gotten used to being second best for so long that I believed that's all I was worth. But I'm not gonna keep waiting anymore."

Rachel stood up defiantly and began marching away.

"Rachel...wait."

But it was only a whisper. That's all the strength Quinn had left.

It had begun to rain, some droplets falling softly onto the earth below. But most slid down Quinn's face and merged with her own tears. Cold and wet.

* * *

She stretched out her hands over the steering wheel, wondering why she had ended up here again. The windshield wipers swished back and forth, in time to the faint music playing in the background, and the lights gave her a strange sense of comfort from the darkness. For some reason, ever since she was a little girl, she'd always had a nightlight near her bed. And when she had a bad dream, it was always there to protect her. She wished that the light could give her the same comfort now, but it seemed to have lost it's magic.

She couldn't remember when she'd started parking outside Rachel Berry's house. It must have started around the same time the letters began. She smiled wistfully, remembering all the times she would be would just sit there and write, planning on how she'd deliver the letters one day.

Would she sneak them in the mail box, and sign them anonymously?

Would she wrap them up with a red ribbon, and leave them on the doormat?

She shook her head, trying to shake off the memory. It wasn't what she should be thinking of right now. She had promised.

She watched through the blurry windscreen, straining her eyes to see a figure emerging from the front door. It was someone, taking out the trash.

"Alright Daddy, I'll just be a minute."

She felt herself swallow hard. She really shouldn't have come here.

The figure made a neat loop with the plastic bag and threw it inside the bin, closing the lid after it.

She smiled, because it was just like her to be so neat and precise.

She watched, as the figure stared out into the rain, and for a split second, it seemed like she was looking right at her.

"Hello? Is anybody there?"

Her coat was getting soaked, but she just stood there and kept staring into her eyes.

"Quinn? Is that you?"

She shut her eyes and submerged her face into her palms, and her body felt tense, overcome by some unknown emotion.

"Rach honey, get inside. You're gonna catch a cold out there!"

"Yes Daddy! I...I just thought I saw someone I knew."

Quinn unblocked her eyes and watched her linger there for a moment longer, before she turned towards the doorway and entered the house.

This couldn't be right.

This just couldn't be right.

She had given her word to God, promised that she'd stay away from her...but she just couldn't. Rachel was safe. Rachel was free to become the star she was always meant to be, to light up broadway brighter than any nightlight, and Quinn should have been happy for her.

But then, why was her heart beating so loudly? Why did that voice in her head keep screaming at her to just run up to the doorstep, ring the bell and beg for Rachel's forgiveness? Why, why why why, was she still in love with her?

"I'm sorry God, but I hope you understand."

Quinn stepped out of the vehicle, locked it, and began to jog towards the doorstep, not caring that she was getting drenched. She was about to press the doorbell when she heard a loud voice coming from upstairs.

Quinn's body trembled in the cold as she ran around the side of the house, and spotted an open window just a few metres above her.

"...you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this. For saints have hands, that pilgirms' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss."

She was practising lines from the play. Quinn managed to find an old ladder covered under some damp bushes.

"Ay, pilgrim. Lips that they must use in prayer!"

It felt sturdy against the wall, and her feel climbed it rung by rung, careful not to slip and fall down.

"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake."

She had reached the small balcony, holding onto the bars to pull herself over.

"Then have my lips the sin that they have took."

Quinn felt herself grow edgy as she whispered Romeo's line:

"Sin from thy lips? O trespass, sweetly urged...give me my sin again."

"You kiss by the book."

Her back pressed into the rough brick wall, and she sighed deeply. This was why it all felt so wrong. Because deep down, Quinn knew that she could never truly be happy if she let Rachel go without a fight. Because, seeing her in Finn's arms would kill her, ever so softly. Because...she finally understood in that one moment what it felt like to love someone more than herself, so much that she'd die for them.

There was a light shuffling sound, and the window slowly began to open, the rusted hinges squeaking and crackling loudly. Quinn hadn't noticed the momentary silence, and now her heart was beating even louder than before.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see her.

Rachel was draped over the window ledge, staring forlornly outside into the rain. If she cast the tiniest of glances to her right, Quinn's cover would be blown. She tried to press harder against the brick to remove her body from sight.

"There's so much to love about you, Quinn Fabray...but you just keep hiding it. Why can't you just open up? Why won't you open up to me?"

Quinn's heart raged inside her chest, threatening to explode. She turned her face towards Rachel slightly, scared she could hear it beating. But she kept looking out into the storm, with the strangest expression on her face. She was smiling.

Quinn's eyes fell down to her slushie-soaked cheerio's uniform.

She really needed to wash it before the stain became permanent. But for just a moment, she felt extraordinary.


	23. Chapter 23: Beneath Your Beautiful

Sometimes, its easier to hide all your true feelings behind a mask. You paint it with the most dazzling, expensive colours, and put so much effort into making it look real that you can almost convince yourself it is.

As Quinn walked to glee club, and she saw kids visibly recoil in her presence, she wished she still had that mask. It had been shattered the day she had first been slushied, the day everyone had seen just a glimpse of the real her. For the first time, she felt like an outsider.

Now the only people who weren't treating her like one were Santana, Brittany and Rachel.

Rachel Berry, the girl who had stood by her despite the horrible way she'd been treated, the girl she'd promised God to stay away from, and then gone back on her word, the girl who told her she'd never let her go.

She smiled sadly as she stood in the doorway, watching her.

There she was, sitting in the front row of the class, eagerly flipping through her geometry textbook in the few spare minutes left before Mr. Schue sprinted in late and out of breath.

It was only yesterday that Quinn had seen her, standing outside in the rain. Her dark eyes staring right into hers, tiny droplets of water wetting the edges of her careless hair. But Rachel didn't seem to mind. She liked water.

She had called out her name, and Quinn felt her heart start healing bit by bit, she could feel the ice melting away.

But she knew it couldn't be true. The window was foggy, stained with rain, and her imagination liked playing tricks on her.

It was just yesterday that, she felt someone had ripped her heart from her chest, and ran away with it never to return. She stood there gasping, pressed against cold, wet adobe. Stood there, listening to Rachel ask the night why she couldn't open up to her.

Quinn felt the tears brimming in her eyes.

"There's so much to love about you, Quinn Fabray."

No Rachel, there really isn't. If I show you the real Quinn, you'll hate me and run away like everybody else has.

"One day, somebody out there will love you just for you, the way you're meant to be loved, ok?"

No. I don't want that kind of love. I can't want that kind of love. It's wrong. And I can't hurt you anymore, so if that means giving you up, so you can find someone that'll make you happy, that'll love you better than I ever could, I'm gonna try.

"But you can't give up."

Why? I took away your sunshine, I made you sad. I made the most beautiful girl in William McKinley High sad, and I can't forgive myself dammit. I'm giving up because it's the right thing to do, and I don't care what you say.

"I'm not allowing it."

Finally, Quinn had no more comebacks in her imaginary repertoire.

"Quit staring at her, Fabgay. She'd never go for a loser like you."

Quinn felt herself snap back to reality and panic gripped her, a small shiver running down her spine at the sound of Karofsky's menacing tone. Those were the exact same words she had said to Rachel all those days ago in the corridor, only now she knew what it felt like to be in her position.

She felt like prey.

"Don't think I'm finished with you yet, Quinnie, this is only the beginning."

He was whispering close to her ear now, paralysing her whole body, making the hairs on the end of her neck stand.

"Quinn, David, what are you doing out here? Is everything alright?"

Mr. Schue had appeared, flustered, coffee cup in hand. His eyes darted between her and Karofsky curiously.

"Everything's peachy, Mr. Schue. Quinn was just going to glee club, weren't you?"

Quinn nodded, looking down at the floor around her feet.

"Yes, you wouldn't want to be late, Quinn." Mr. Schue began slowly, "But she can't exactly get inside if you're holding on to her like that, can she David?"

Karofsky's grin faded and his arm left Quinn's shoulder as he slinked away down the hall. Mr. Schue gazed at her expectantly, but Quinn just forced a smile and entered the room, trying to shake off the fear that kept choking her.

She sat down next to Brittany and Santana, who shot her puzzled looks.

"Whoa Q, you look like you've seen a ghost. What's up?"

"It's nothing important."

"That's what you said last time and it turned out to be-"

"It's the bastard isn't it? What did he do to you!?"

"Nothing."

"Alright Q, don't tell me. Maybe you wanna tell Ra-chel, she keeps staring at you like a lifebuoy."

Quinn's heart sped up at the mention of her name, and slowly turned her head to see if it was true.

Immediately, Rachel jerked her gaze away and directed it back to her textbook, pretending to be fascinated with some equation.

"It's alright, S. I can take care of myself."

Quinn heard herself say, eyes never leaving Rachel. Santana just sighed.

"Ok guys, who'd like to volunteer themselves for a song next?"

Everyone was silent. Ever since the cheerios had performed "Killing Me Softly", there was a general reluctance to sing about personal feelings.

"Well, since no one's putting their hands up, how about you, Mercedes? We haven't heard that beautiful voice of yours in a while."

Mercedes got out of her chair and moved towards the front, waiting for her peers to get settled properly before she began.

"Alright y'all, I don't know about you, but I've been feeling a bit down lately. There's someone out there who won't let me see beneath his beautiful, but I'm gonna try."

Quinn closed her eyes and tightened her grip on the arm rest, and Mercedes finally began.

She started out quietly, but her usually powerful voice was trembling. Quinn could hear her trying to keep it all under control. Trying to hide behind her perfectly constructed mask.

Just like she was.

She'd find a way to build it all over again, because it was the only way she knew how to live. And she'd never take it off.

The song finally came to an end, just as the bell rang, and Quinn stood to walk out the door without looking where she was going.

"Here, take one."

Quinn stopped. Someone was nudging her from behind.

She took the tissue from their hand, ready to exit, but the hand gripped hers and she felt fingers sliding past her own, enveloping her hand fully.

"Quinn, are you ok?"

She looked, out of the corner of her eye, to see Rachel watching her, a small packet of kleenex in her hands.

God definitely had it in for her.

She turned fully to face her in the eyes, and felt her breath catch when she was met with wet brown eyes, glistening sadly, matching her wet sparkle of hazel.

Rachel, why are you doing this to me?

"Hey, wait up Rach."

Finn had jogged over to where they were, and elbowed Rachel playfully. He noticed Quinn standing in front of her, their hands linked, and he frowned.

"She's not making you uncomfortable, is she Rachel?"

Quinn smiled, feeling the tissue absorb her tears as she pressed it against her eyes.

"I was just going, don't worry Finn."

She turned to go, but Rachel's grip wasn't getting any looser. Finn's frown deepened.

"What are you doing, Quinn?"

"Hey hey hey, break it up guys. No need to go all weird on her, Finnocence."

Thank God Santana decided to step in.

"It just looked like she was getting a bit clo-"

"Whoa, Hudson, back down. You think Q was hitting on a girl who isn't even your girlfriend? Come on, Ra-chel's just comforting a girl who's in pain. Or are you blind as well as stupid?"

Quinn detached her hands from Rachel's in an effort to put some more space between them.

"Y-Yeah, I guess so." Finn said in resignation, but shot a stern glance at Quinn. "Come on Rach, there's something I've been meaning to ask you."

Rachel was walking now, slipping away from her, but not before she turned and their eyes met one last time.

"I'm sorry."

Rachel mouthed before she returned her attention to Finn, and they were gone.

"Don't look so heartbroken, Q. All great romances have a little bit of drama. Aren't we studying Romeo and Juliet in English?"

Quinn's features creased in annoyance.

"What are you suggesting, S?"

"I'm suggesting," Santana said, laughing lightly now, "That Puckerman is having a masquerade ball this Saturday and Finncompetent is probably gonna ask Ra-chel to be his date."

Quinn shut her eyes tightly, trying to block the thought from her mind. She could do this. Baby steps. This was the beginning of letting go.

"If that's you pretending you don't care Q, then you've got a long way to go."

The remainder of the day passed by in a blur, teachers calling Quinn randomly to come up to the whiteboard, the odd student here and there chucking paper-balls at her, and then narrowly missing out on being slushied because Karofsky's mates were having an off-day and accidentally missed her.

But all day, her mind had been gearing up to one thing.

Spending time with Rachel on the tracks after school.

And yet, now that it was here, she felt strangely dissatisfied.

Rachel was nowhere to be seen, and Sue was already glaring at her angrily, threatening her to extend laps for another couple of hours if she didn't start in five minutes. Quinn believed her. There was once a time when Sue had made the cheerios train in conditions that were practically monsoonal. Half the team had contracted pneumonia and Sue had called them all 'weaklings'. Quinn found herself smiling at the memory now.

"I'm sorry I'm late!"

Quinn's attention zapped upwards. Rachel was jogging down the slope towards the tracks, her face red and flushed. She looked like she had a fever.

"Problems with the solarium lately, Berry?"

"No actually, Coach Sylvester. I've come to tell you that I won't be able to do laps today, because I seem to have come down with a fever and I really must get home to rest. I was actually wondering whether you'd drive me home, Quinn."

Quinn's eyes lit up and she had to force herself not to smile.

"Fever schmever, all you dainty little prissies these days. Your body temperature rises 0.1 degree above normal and you throw a hissy fit. Seeing as I'm feeling generous today, I'll let you two have a break. However if I find that you've decided to ditch again tomorrow I'll be forced to extend this punishment for another whole week. Got it?"

They both nodded.

"Alright, arriverderci."

Rachel's face turned into a grin, probably at Sue's attempt to use Italian, and she walked up to Quinn.

"That would be alright, wouldn't it?"

Quinn felt herself go limp, her facial muscles relaxing into an easy smile.

"I...guess so."

Rachel smiled and soon enough they had reached her car, and Quinn was opening the door for her.

"So do you need to stop and by some medication on the way home? You do look quite sick."

Now Rachel was grinning wider and wider and it was starting to freak Quinn out. She was trying to be serious here, do the right thing for once. Had she done something wrong?

"I made that up."

Quinn's felt her body freeze.

"Um, w-why would you do that for?"

"Well..." Rachel began, her eyes sparkling with mischief, "There's this place I want to show you. It's sort of like my secret. I go there when I'm feeling sad and it always has a way of cheering me up."

Rachel hadn't stepped inside yet. She was waiting for her to give her approval.

This was definitely one of those moments in life you look back on and think, what if I had chosen to listen to the crazy side of me? What if, instead of saying no, just because it was the right thing to do, I said yes? In her head, Quinn knew that the plan to make Rachel happy did not star herself, even in a supporting role. But here it was, this small mercy that God was granting her.

"If you aren't scared of my driving, then I think I'll take you up on your offer."

Rachel beamed, and hopped inside the car. Quinn shut her door carefully, and ran to the other side, pulling out her keys excitedly.

"Oh Quinn, promise me one thing?"

"What's that?"

"Now that I know who you really want...please don't kill me."


	24. Chapter 24: Ignite

The journey to Rachel's secret hiding place didn't take long, but Quinn had kept unusually silent. Perhaps it was the implication behind Rachel's words that was making her so nervous. Rachel knew that Quinn wanted her, that she liked her. How did Rachel feel about that? She had never really said anything out loud. And the fact that she hadn't said anything out loud in clear, defined terms was probably the scariest part of all. What was Rachel thinking? Was she really as comfortable as she appeared? And what on earth was going on between them? Quinn parked the car slowly, outside what seemed to be a massive park with wooden play equipment and turned to Rachel with a questioning gaze.

"Follow me."

It was a command, gentle yet firm, and Quinn had no time to stall because Rachel had already broken out into a pace.

"Wait!"

But Rachel just kept moving. She was giggling now. She seemed to be enjoying the fact that Quinn couldn't keep up with her. What was she playing at?

"Catch me if you can, Fabray!"

Quinn's nose twitched at being called by her surname, but then the realisation kicked in, and she felt a smile she couldn't control start forming. Rachel was playing with her.

Quinn sprang into motion, putting into use all her cheerios training and afternoon practices at the tracks. She was running as fast as she could, sprinting even, but apparently it wasn't fast enough to catch Rachel. Quinn eventually slowed her pace, panting and out of breath, as she watched Rachel climbing one of the wooden houses. As she watched she could see all the other kids, scurrying into holes and laughing, poking each other from behind and screaming out 'boo!' to scare their friends. It was ridiculous, childish. Her parents would never approve of her wasting time at a place like this.

But boy did it look fun.

''Rachel, who's that? She looks scary.''

Quinn frowned at the little boy who was tugging at Rachel's arm. He wasn't more than 6 but judging by his confident demeanour, he was going to be one of those tough jocks who thought they were cream of the crop when he got older.

Rachel leaned down, whispering in his ear loudly, but kept her eyes on Quinn.

''Her? She's the big bad wolf, and she's come to eat you all up!''

The boy's eyes widened and he stared at Quinn straight in the eye, frightened now. Quinn smirked.

''That's right, and you know, I especially like eating little boys. They're my favourites.''

She launched herself onto the ladder and began ascending it quickly, noting how the boy kept stepping back. By the time she reached the top he had quickly slipped down the pole and was bolting as fast as his legs could carry him.

''Mommy!''

Quinn folded her arms and stood there, proud of herself.

''Quinn, you just made my friend run away!''

She turned to look at Rachel, mock disappointment on her face, and slowly began to step closer.

''Yes, I think wolves tend to have that effect. And since my dinner just ran away, maybe I'll just have to eat you all up instead.''

Rachel's eyes filled with panic, and Quinn knew this was the perfect time to pounce. She leaped forward, narrowly missing her arm as she heard herself laughing, because Rachel was taking this seriously and Quinn loved it. She jumped down onto the tanbark and started running, but this time, she was running as the big bad wolf. And he was much, much faster than Quinn Fabray.

Soon she was within inches of her, just managing to grip her shirt and feel it slide through her fingers.

This was it.

Quinn jumped forward and heard Rachel scream loudly as her hands latched onto her shirt, and they both fell down onto the floor roughly, tumbling down the grassy hill. Rachel flailed wildly in her grip but Quinn wasn't letting go, not until they reached the bottom. They rolled over and over, bumping against green blades until the hill levelled out and their bodies unravelled, and they were lying down on their backs completely spent.

Quinn closed her eyes, and she could feel it.

The energy pumping through her, the one she used to have before she had lost her armour. She felt...invincible.

"Quinn?"

The sound of Rachel's voice stirred emotions within her, ones she had long been trying to suppress.

"Quinn I...would you mind if I..."

Suddenly Quinn felt hot air being blown against her mouth. She swallowed when she felt thick strands of hair brush against the sides of her face, and inhaled the scent of bubblegum.

She felt her breathing quicken, but all too soon her breaths stilled completely, because she felt soft lips covering hers.

Soft lips that melted against her mouth, lips that tasted like strawberry bubblegum and teeth that bit her lower lip and made her arch back into the grass in agony, and then those same lips were gently pressing, pushing down deeper against her and Quinn felt her brain explode into fireworks, and then, everything was as dark as a starry night and the lips were gone, and she was gasping for air.

She couldn't bring herself to open her eyes. Couldn't bring herself to stop savouring that magical taste, her first taste of heaven.

"Quinn?"

Rachel was calling her, as if waking her from a dream.

"Quinn it's getting late, we have to go."

At last Quinn opened her eyes, and saw Rachel looking down at her, hand outstretched. She took it without question, letting Rachel lift her up and lead her back towards the car. Quinn still felt slightly dazed, but she was awake enough to know that Rachel's hand was in hers, warm and tight. She wasn't exactly sure whether what had just happened was real, because Rachel kept acting as if nothing had happened.

Neither of them spoke a word as Quinn drove her back home. The light rain spattered down on the roof of the car as it came to a stop outside Rachel's house, and they slowly walked to the porch, feeling each fresh droplet on their skin.

"Thank you for driving me home, big bad wolf."

Quinn felt herself grinning like the cheshire cat.

"Will you be coming to scare away all the children at Puck's party this Saturday?"

Quinn's face slumped. The afternoon had been fun, a break from reality-even...but the games had to end at one point.

"Finn asked me to go you see, but after the way he laughed when I said my dads would be making my costume, and laughed at the fact that they're my dads...well. You can imagine the dressing down I gave him. And to think he had the nerve to ask something like that after all I've ever done is refuse his advances."

Quinn couldn't believe what she was hearing. The cheshire cat was back again in full swing. Heck, her heart was about to explode from all the built up excitement.

"I think would love to go and spook some kids out."

Rachel's eyes were shining now, and she was grinning just like her, a faint blush covering her cheeks.

"Well, I guess I'll see you there then."

Rachel turned to go, but faltered at the last minute and looked over her shouder.

"By the way Quinn, I don't know what lip-gloss you use, but whatever it is...it tastes amazing."


	25. Chapter 25: Don't Dream It's Over-Pt I

As she leaned back onto the doorway, she breathed out with a heavy sigh.

Her fingers slowly rose to her lips, tracing over them. They were still tingling, and her eyelids fluttered closed involuntarily, but her silent reverie was broken by a scream on the other side of the door.

"I love your lip-gloss even more!"

The corners of Rachel's mouth curved upward, and she felt the fever return. The very same mad rush she'd felt in the park.

She hadn't planned it. Any of it, really. She had just wanted to cheer Quinn up, and perhaps see a smile on her face. She never in a million years thought that Quinn would attack her like that. But, nevertheless, thinking about it just made her grin widen.

They were tumbling, her and the big bad wolf, and when their bodies were so close like that, she had felt something. Something good.

She could hear Quinn skipping away to her car now, and her heart lurched. She didn't want that moment to end. The moment where she felt so out of control with fever that she couldn't stop it. Her thoughts were going crazy and she felt like anything was possible, and then, she was leaning down over Quinn's mouth to close the gap, as if somehow that would make the fever go away.

And then?

Then their lips were connected and Quinn's mouth tasted like candy, like rainbow swirls and lollipops and Rachel didn't think she'd ever tasted anything better. She hadn't wanted to stop. Strange things were happening inside her head, like something was exploding, and the deeper she went the louder it got, and she wasn't sure if she opened her eyes she'd wake up on her bed again, from one of her dreams.

But Quinn's lips were pressing back, soft and delicate, and when she had bitten down gently just to see if they really were made of candy, Quinn's body had pushed down hard into the grass underneath them, so she had moved closer to feel that warmth again, the good feeling that had overtaken her when they were just tumbling down the hill like little kids without a care in the world.

Quinn had told Santana-well, she hadn't actually said the words. Was she really...in love with her? How could it be, that the girl who had bullied her non-stop actually loved her out of all people? How could anyone love a geek like her?

The sun had started to set, and she pulled away, looking down at Quinn's beautiful face. A smile was painted over it and for once, it seemed genuine.

In that one precious moment before she had fallen asleep, Rachel had seen beneath her mask.

She watched her like that till the last rays of sunlight disappeared, marvelling in the peace that surrounded them there. She had wondered, what exactly Quinn was dreaming of as she lay there, completely free, completely at her mercy, and yet, for some reason Rachel felt it was the other way around. Like she was at Quinn's mercy, and that she would do anything for her.

She had reluctantly woken Quinn up, and seeing her open her eyes suddenly made her nervous. She hoped that Quinn wouldn't say anything, or ask her about what just happened, because she couldn't even understand it herself. She didn't have the words. Rachel Berry, executor of large sentences that practically fell out of the dictionary, was lost for words. Finally, she could understand how Quinn must have felt that day in the locker room, when she stumbled over what she was saying.

Just a few moments ago, they had reached the front porch, like all those nights ago when she had watched Quinn drive off.

Quinn had told her, even then, that she wanted her. Even if it was hypothetically. At the time, Rachel wouldn't have a word of it. Quinn had stood there, listening without saying anything as Rachel told her to stay out of her life. Her lips quivered, and she was crumbling as Rachel told her it wasn't possible that she felt that way. It just didn't add up. It couldn't.

Her mind flew back to that day in the sick bay, when Quinn had spoken to her with more sincerity than usual. The day Quinn apologised over and over again as she held her, letting her tears fall onto her cheerios uniform without wiping them away or calling her disgusting or manhands. The way she had stared at her through the library shelves, blushing when she realised she was watching her. The way she had promised, not to hurt her anymore, just like in her dream. Quinn was looping her star necklace around her neck, about to tell her something before her phone interrupted, carrying her to the car, so she wouldn't limp all the way home. Then she was stepping in front of her to take the full force of the slushie, and when she held her, she had clung to her so tightly she felt like she couldn't breathe. She had begged her to never let go, and all too soon she was crying because she felt that no one could ever love her.

Rachel wiped a small tear from her eye, and she could see herself, frantic over why Quinn's hands were so red. She was furious because she knew that Karofsky had probably hurt her. But she wasn't telling her. She was facing it alone, like she didn't want to burden anyone with her problems. Rachel, staring at the familiar car parked across her house with the faint music playing, and madly hoping that it was Quinn, even though that wouldn't be possible. Rachel, staring out into the rain hopelessly, wishing that Quinn was with her right at that moment so she could just hold her, make her a hot cup of tea and listen to her all night long, just so she wouldn't be alone. Just so she could see her breathtakingly beautiful smile.

This time, when the big bad wolf had come to stand on her porch, she was grinning. She was grinning with that cheeky face, and she looked beautiful standing there as the humid droplets of water splashed on the porch beside her. She was beautiful.

Why couldn't she see it, that there was so much to love about her? Why couldn't she see, how much Rachel cared about her, how much she loved her?

Rachel's hands flew over her mouth and she gasped loudly, her heartbeat pulsing like mad and her fingers shaking visibly.

"Rachel Barbra Berry, I think you have some serious explaining to do."

Her head snapped upward and her eyes shrank when she saw Leroy lowering his hand away from the curtains, and Hiram standing before her, a deadly serious expression on his face.

It was all over.


	26. Chapter 26: Don't Dream It's Over-Pt II

Realising that you love someone is probably one of the strangest things you'll experience in your life. Scientists have analysed countless times what exactly it is that makes us fall in love, but there are some things that science just cannot explain-and perhaps it's for a reason.

For example, science cannot explain the fact that Romeo fell for Juliet (who belonged to a family that spited his own with a passion) upon their very first meeting. Or why he continued to love her even though he knew it was impossible for them to be together, because the world kept coming in between them.

Science could also not explain, why Rachel Berry had somehow found herself leaning against her front door, the familiar white door she had walked through since she was a little kid, coming to the conclusion she loved Quinn. It seemed now that Sylvester was right when she had said Rachel couldn't see what was right in front of her. Rachel knew that door, and she pressed hard against it to try and make sense of things, because as sure as she was that this white door would always be there for her, and never change, for the first time in her life, she wasn't sure if she had changed. She wasn't sure if she was the same Rachel Berry. That girl with the voice of an angel, that girl who volunteered herself for every glee club because she was damn good and she knew it, that same girl who had dreamed of lighting up the stage on Broadway since she could remember. She wasn't even sure if it was possible that the Rachel that loved Quinn, the Rachel who thought her feelings for Quinn were in fact fever, could live in this messed up reality-in a world where she would never be able to have her. A world where the only way they could be together was in her dreams, because her fathers would do everything in their power to keep them apart. Because Quinn was bad for her, and she deserved better. She prayed, that they somehow hadn't heard their conversation. Because if they had...

"Rachel, sit down on the sofa now. Your Dad and I have some things to discuss with you."

If they had heard? She'd rather not think of the consequences. She'd do her best to be more discreet from here on, to try and keep it a secret. That would be the only way to see her.

Rachel swallowed and felt the weight of her body leave the door, her last ounce of comfort, and then she was walking without thinking. She fell onto the couch, numb.

"Rachel. We were worried sick when you didn't answer our calls. It's already 7:30pm and we had no idea where you were. No idea. Do you understand what that means for a parent? You could have been anywhere. We called your phone over twenty times. Did you even check to see if you had any messages?"

She shook her head, knowing full well this conversation was far from over. Hiram always used that tone just before he addressed his real concern. She could almost feel him frowning at her.

"We called the school, and the principal told us youve been doing laps in the afternoon with Coach Sylvester. So I called her, and guess what she told me?"

Rachel's face sank and she grabbed a pillow to hold on to. She bit her lip, knowing what was coming.

"She said that 'Berry' was completing detention every day after school for a week. Why didn't you tell us, Rachel? Why did you lie to us that day, and say you had fallen down the stairs, when you were really in detention?

Rachel let out a sigh of relief, and she lowered the pillow from her body, hoping that would be the end of it. But Hiram was nowhere near finished yet.

"And why didn't you tell us that you were doing those laps with Quinn?"

There was a slight rise in his voice and she could sense his anger when he mentioned Quinn's name. She knew her relief would be short lived.

"How long has this been happening Rachel?"

She kept silent, looking everywhere except Hiram's face.

"How long have you been going behind our back and spending time with that girl?"

Again, not a peep. Rachel didn't have the courage to breathe let alone speak right now.

"This is the same girl who's been traumatising our baby. I thought we already had this talk Rachel. And I honestly thought you knew better. But...judging from what just happened on our front doorstep, not only is it clear that you've continued to let that monster drive you home-"

Suddenly something inside Rachel snapped completely and then it was as if someone else was saying the words for her.

"She...She's not a monster!"

"Keep quiet Rachel, your Daddy's talking."

Leroy admonished. His voice was cold, and unforgiving. It made Rachel shiver.

"Not only do you let that monster drive you home," Hiram went on, his temper rising further now, "But you organise to have future meetings with her. Don't think your Dad and I are oblivious to what's going on, or that we didn't hear what you told her before you came inside."

Rachel felt herself grow tense all over, and the colour drained from her face. They knew. They actually knew. In a split-second all her dreams were shattered and her heart felt like it had been scorched. It kept beating louder and louder, the tension within her erupting into frenzy.

"You know we don't have a problem if you end up liking a girl, Rachel. We've made that clear to you from day one but-"

"Daddy...p-please don't-"

"But..." Hiram cut in, "I forbid you to see her. Forbid it. You are not to go to that party and I absolutely forbid you to share detention with that girl ever again-I've arranged that much with Coach Sylvester already. Perhaps you think I'm being harsh Rachel. But you've deliberately disobeyed us, and I will not stand by and watch you ruin your life...I will not let you ruin your life for a girl who can only ever cause you misery!"

He was yelling at her. Her Daddy, the most supportive guy on earth who would never turn her away no matter what was yelling at her. Now that she needed him the most.

"D-Daddy, you don't know what you're talking about! She's changed, she's become a better person...b-because of me! You don't know her, you don't know what she's been through!"

Hiram's face flushed red with anger, and he struggled to keep his calm.

"And you do? You think she's doing all this because she cares about you? She's damaged, Rachel, and she's manipulating you because she can see you have a good heart. That's all it is. Don't think I don't know her type. I've seen it a thousand times before! These people, they suck you dry until they get what they want, and when they do, they drop you like a worthless piece of junk. Or have you forgotten the story of the scorpion and the fox?"

Rachel felt herself shrivel at the mention of it, and clutched tighter to the pillow in her lap.

"It's in these people's nature to bring you down, and I am not letting you make that mistake. They won't change no matter what you do. They convince you that you've somehow made a difference and make you feel comfortable enough to get close to them. And when you do, it's too late. They revert back to their old habits and they tear you, they grind you down to the ground. They won't change and they don't change, and they most certainly do not deserve your goodness."

Silent tears fell from her sunken brown eyes. She fought every instinct she had to look away, and instead gazed back at her father in the face, trembling, and said:

"But Daddy...you once told me that hate isn't the answer..."

Confusion coloured his face before he regained his sense of rhythm.

"Rachel this is different-"

"You told me...that love always prevails..."

"Not in this case, that doesn't apply to he-"

"You told me...that some people change you forever."

Hiram stared down at her sternly, his expression growing concerned.

"Forget about what I said Rachel, I told you that when you were four years old for heaven's sake! You're seventeen now, seventeen! You're a beautiful young woman destined for bigger and brighter things and it's breaking my heart that you want to throw it all away for some girl who will never, ever respect you for what you're worth! Rachel, look into my eyes and promise me. Promise your Dad that you'll stay away from her, and do what's right for your future. You're changing Rachel. But she's not. She's not changing and she never will!"

Rachel stood up and let the pillow fall to the floor. She stared at her Daddy. Simply stared at him, with hurt, wet eyes and disbelief that shook her to the core. He wasn't backing down.

But neither was she.

"What if I'm the exception, Daddy?"

Her entire body quivered at the edges.

"What if I'm the only one who can help her change and show the world who she really is? I've seen it, you know. I've seen beneath all the harsh words and cold glares, and I know what a good person she really is...I've seen what kindness can do for people, Daddy, and I can finally see how love really is the only way to fix someone. I know what love looks like. And I kn-know, because...I am...I am in lo-"

"Rachel Berry, don't you say another word. Don't you dare say those words or I'll personally cancel your student enrollment and make you start at a new school. You're a straight-A student. You've got Broadway lined up for you, and it's been your dream since you were a little girl. You're a star. You're privileged to live in a home with a roof over your head and have an education most kids dream about. Do you understand how lucky you are? Don't throw it away baby. I'm not letting you throw that all away for some girl who probably has no direction in her life, no religious principles whatsoever, and who hasn't treated you the way you deserve to be treated!"

He exhaled deeply, and his hand caught the couch to stop from falling. Rachel's eyes flooded completely.

"She...She's catholic, Daddy.."

"I don't care what she is!" He yelled loudly, his anger unbridled. "You are not, I repeat, not to see her again. I don't want to hear another word of this. You're our daughter, Rachel, and I won't allow you to throw away your dreams like this. You are not throwing away your dreams for some stupid girl that won't value you. I'm not letting you do the same thing I did, one that almost cost me my dreams. Go up to your room now."

Leroy winced and cast his head away at Hiram's words.

"Daddy...Daddy I lov-"

"Upstairs, NOW."

At last, Rachel couldn't fight back the tears anymore. They stung her face and her cheeks grew inflamed, burnt by the hot droplets that streamed down. She let out a raw, pained cry and ran up the stairs, her body feverish, convulsing slightly. Slamming the door behind her, she dived beneath the covers and wrapped them around her body so tightly it was almost suffocating.

But she didn't care.

Her head pounded with confusion and guilt, guilt that she felt wasn't even warranted. Because loving someone wasn't supposed to come with so many obstacles, it just wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that she had worked so hard, that she had finally broken down Quinn's defences and watched her come so, so far, to see beneath her façade, and then be told that she had to throw it all away. Because loving her was like snow loving the sun. They could never be together, because the snow would always melt in the sun's presence whenever they got too close, no matter how much they tried to deny that fact. She had to find a way to stop falling in love with Quinn-that beautiful ray of sunlight-and focus on her dreams. She had to forget about the stupid girl who had stolen her heart and never even given her a chance to realise it.

But she couldn't.

She couldn't because, Quinn had become her dreams. She didn't know exactly how it had even happened, but she wanted to have her as much as she wanted to be on Broadway, if not more. When she imagined singing on stage to all the amazed onlookers in the crowd, she wanted Quinn to be there, smiling that crazy beautiful smile and clapping for her. Just for her.

Why, if there was a God watching over her right now, in her interracial household, would he desert her at her time of greatest need? Now, that she needed a miracle, now when even her fathers couldn't see what she could see in Quinn?

It is said in life, that we have this predetermined notion of what is going to be. How our future will unfold, and how we'll make that happen. However, very much to our surprise, God finds a way to throw us in the deep end, and make us face things we never thought we'd face. Sometimes to the point where we question what exactly went wrong with our plans. But it isn't that anything was ever wrong in the first place, really. Perhaps only God can see our true dreams, the ones even we can't see or understand for ourselves, and leads us along the strangest, and most unexpected paths to reach them.

Rachel held tightly to her star of David, and wondered whether God had made some sort of mistake with her. That it had been an accident that she out of all people had been there for Quinn, and that really, all along it was meant for someone else to be in her place. Even if she didn't want it to be.

She cried herself to sleep. And she cried because realising that she loved Quinn was becoming one of the strangest experiences of her life. But realising that she loved Quinn and could never have her? That was probably the strangest of them all.

In the midst of her dreamless sleep, she heard a quiet knocking at her door.

"Rach? Rach honey, its me."

Rachel stirred at the sound of Leroy's voice.

The door creaked open and soon, she felt strong arms enveloping her into a hug. It was her Dad. She felt safe in his arms, and whimpered against his chest as he hushed her gently.

"Rach...please don't cry. You know your Daddy's just trying to protect you. He wants you to be happy, and so do I."

She sobbed into his shoulder and held onto him tightly.

"Dad...Dad. I'm...in love with her."

And it was barely even a whisper.

"I...am happy. I'm happy when I'm with Quinn, when she's happy. When I see her smiling my whole world feels like one-hundred gold stars shining in the night sky. I know, that she treated me badly, but now I know why..."

"Rach?" He probed gently, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

She paused, hesitant about whether to reveal Quinn's secret.

"It's ok, I'm not gonna judge you. It's just you and me now."

A long silence passed between them before Rachel finally decided to speak.

"Dad...Quinn doesn't like boys, and the whole year level found out in the corridor a few days ago."

Leroy inhaled loudly.

"She's been treated like dirt ever since, and I know what that feels like, Dad. I know what it feels like to be an outsider. So I said to myself, Rachel? What have your dads always told you? They said that love was the only way to fix things. They said, that the way you chose to react to situations was up to you. So I chose, Dad. I chose to be her friend, because that's what she needed."

"Rachel..."

"And then...things started to become clearer to me. It's like I could see how much she'd been holding back because she was so afraid of being herself, and what others would say. Afraid even, to tell me that she...liked me, so instead, she bullied me to make herself feel better. To...try and forget about me. She tried to please everyone else and hold on to her popularity because it made things easy for her. She had control. No one could push her around."

Rachel's eyes were renewed with tears.

"N-no one could push her around except herself. Her own heart. She broke down in front of me and I held her, Dad. She told me to never let go...and...and I can't. I just can't. What do I do Dad?"

She felt him tighten his grip around her.

"Dad? What do I do? I can't stop loving her..."

"Shhh. It's ok, Rach. It's gonna be ok." He whispered into her ear, rubbing her back.

"You know something? You remind me very much of someone who's sleeping just a couple of rooms away."

"Wh-What do you mean?"

She was hurt and confused, and all she wanted right now was for her Dad to keep holding her like that. Because maybe if he did, she could try to forget about her feelings, and rewind back to the day before she'd met Quinn. Maybe Hiram was right. Maybe, letting her go was what she had to do. That's what they say about soul mates. They're the ones who help you become your best self, and when you go to tell them you're in love with them, they've disappeared. Because that's all they were ever there for, to help you become better.

"Many years ago, when I was just a young boy, I was walking in a library. I was a bit of a bookworm, you see. I liked poetry, and art...but I never told anyone about that side of me. All they wanted was the star of the football team that helped win championships. They wanted the boy who talked down to the other kids and beat up all those nerds who sang or did drama or maths and science...and I did them that favour."

Rachel listened more carefully now, controlling her sobs.

"But there was this one boy who wouldn't let me make fun of him, and I really resented that. He cried when my friends and I laughed at him for staying back late after science class to ask questions, but he never quit being himself. He loved it too much, learning, challenging his mind. And he never cared what anyone else thought of him either. I never admitted it to my friends, but I really admired him. On the surface the only thing I showed was how much I thought he was a dork, and I always went out of my way to call him names and mock him. And him specifically. Then I started wondering why."

Rachel pulled away slowly, looking at Leroy seriously.

"What I realised scared me, Rach. I realised that, the way all my friends liked girls was different to the way I liked them. I could only ever see them as friends, and I wondered where that left me. What that meant. That was until I discovered...that all the resentment and the name calling and mocking weren't because I thought that boy was a dork."

He put his hands over Rachel's shoulders now and gazed deeply into her eyes.

"It was because I loved him."

A bittersweet smile swept across Leroy's face, and he caressed Rachel's cheek lovingly.

"I loved him so much Rachel, but I was so afraid! I was scared of what everyone else would think of me. I tried to keep pretending to hate him but each time he got bullied it broke me a little more inside. I felt like a joke. There I was, a big muscly jock, fawning over a scrawny little thing like him."

Rachel's eyes widened, and her hands covered her dad's, squeezing gently.

"One day...the whole school found out. They found out I liked him, a boy, and that I didn't like girls. Every single kid turned on me. Even those who I thought were my friends. Now I was the one getting called names, and it felt awful. I felt so, so alone. But there was one person who came by my side, to tell me everything was going to be ok. And you know who that was?"

She couldn't bear to look into her dad's eyes now, because she knew the answer. She knew, and the whole story bore a sickening similarity to her own situation. She wasn't sure if her heart could take it. But she would try.

"Who?"

"That boy that I bullied. The science dork that I picked on constantly. He was the only one. The only exception."

Rachel felt her face burning up again and her hand fastened around her necklace determinedly.

"He helped me accept who I was. He never judged, he just listened. I felt terrible for all the things I had done to him...but he just stood by me. He didn't seem to be afraid of the fact that I was gay, nor the fact that I liked him. No, he wasn't afraid because-by some miracle sent down from the heavens above-he had fallen in love with me too. His parents hated me. They said I was a faggot...I was trash, and even as a friend, someone like me would hold him back from being a doctor. I wasn't even Jewish! So you know what we did, Rach?"

She shook her head silently.

"We ran away. He gave up his dream to be a doctor for me, so I could be on stage and bring my poetry to life. But after a couple of months, I knew that what I had done was wrong. I made him go back to his parents and I took all the abuse they hurled at me. They said they'd never give me their blessing to be with him. I had corrupted him, and stolen away his chances at living a normal life. We moved to a small apartment in the city, and I paid all the costs of his medical school. I couldn't let him give up his dream, and it hurt me that I had come so close to doing exactly what his parents accused me of doing. But I didn't give up on him. I just couldn't. And you know why, Rach?"

Rachel was very, very silent now. She nodded, but just barely. Leroy pulled her into a hug and breathed into her back.

"That day, when the seventeen year old me walked into that library, I went inside to read a book on poetry. But that day, was the day I met a boy who would change my life forever. A boy who made me laugh. A boy who made me cry. And that boy? He changed me forever. Rach...do you know who that boy was?"

She cried into his chest, clawing tightly at his back because she couldn't process everything and it was all happening too fast.

"Rach? I think you just might be Quinn's exception. But don't tell your Daddy I said that...he might just kill me."

Tears of sadness and heartbreak were overwhelmed with a strange gush of happiness, and Rachel felt her self heal, just that little bit. She wiped her face into her quilt, drying the wet stains that painted her cheeks.

Maybe it was true, after all. Maybe at your darkest times, when you only saw that one set of footprints on the beach, that it was God that was holding you.

"Goodnight, baby."

Leroy pressed a kiss to her forehead, and shuffled off her bed before quietly exiting and shutting the door behind him.

Rachel took a deep long breath and held it, just a little bit longer than usual, because she wanted to make sure this was all real.

She broke out into a coughing fit, gasping for air and panted roughly.

It was real.

She smiled, and dipped her head back under the covers and closed her eyes, silently thanking her lucky stars that she had two wonderful dads after all.

"Rachel, open up, it's me."

Rachel frowned, because the quiet knocking didn't sound like it was coming from the door. And that voice...

"Come on, Rach. I'm not gonna wait out here all night."

Rachel's body jerked bolt upright. Her heart began fluttering like crazy, and her eyes darted to the window, where a shadowy figure was propped up.

She gulped. This had to be a-

"Okay sorry, that was mean. Can I come in?"

Slowly, Rachel slipped out from underneath the covers and headed towards the window. Her fingers trembled as she unlocked it, and watched it open, the powerful beams of moonlight splashing across her body. When she let her eyes flicker upward, she heard herself gasp, and felt her breath catch in her throat.

"Q-Quinn? W-What are you doing here?"

She grinned her big bad wolf grin and jumped down lightly so she landed just inches in front of her, grabbing her arms so she wouldn't fall forward, and her grin widened.

"Hunting you, of course."

Rachel felt her head grow fuzzy when Quinn's hands slid down her arms and interlocked their fingers together.

"You know...I haven't really been able to get the taste of your lip-gloss out of my head."

Quinn's eyes shone bright hazel in the cool night air, and her warm breaths came out in gentle puffs over Rachel's face.

"What flavour is it?"

Rachel felt like her heart had been seized against her will, and even though Hiram would positively murder her if he found out that Quinn had traversed through their garden, and climbed up to her window just to see her...well, perhaps she didn't need to tell him everything.

She felt herself let go, breathing a sigh of relief, and soon her grin was as wide as Quinn's.

"Strawberry."

She said, still smiling.

"Pompous much?"

Quinn jokingly brushed her forehead against Rachel's before leaning in closer, causing Rachel's breathing to constrict further.

"R-Rachel? Has anyone ever told you how...b-beautiful you are?"

Quinn's lips were centimetres from hers, and the way she was gazing at her with those sparkling hazel eyes made her blush.

"...Yes, I believe they have."

Quinn slowly closed the gap and for the second time, Rachel tasted candy and watermelon flavoured lollipops and she realised that Quinn's lips were pressing against hers. Quinn was kissing her, and she could hear her moaning quietly as her hands draped over her shoulders and pulled tight, so their bodies were touching, the heat emanating everywhere and alighting all her senses. She could hear them at last, the fireworks everyone would rave about, as Quinn slid her tongue across her lip, shyly, tentatively, and then the fireworks were exploding absolutely everywhere and Rachel's heart drummed like a long overdue marching band and it wasn't a dream-oh God it was real! It was so real, and she made up her mind in that split-second that she would never, ever let Quinn go. Not even if she asked her to. Because this was a miracle, sent from the heavens above. Quinn was her miracle.

Breaking contact just for a moment, Rachel kept her eyes closed and breathed into Quinn's face.

"Never let me go, Quinn."

She felt Quinn smiling against her before she leaned in to connect their lips again.

"I won't. And when the big bad wolf makes a promise, she keeps it."


	27. Chapter 27: Impossible

Rachel sighed heavily as their English teacher droned on about something that was far more pertinent to her situation than she gave credit for.

Last night, her dreams had literally come to life. She gasped quietly at the slow realisation. Quinn Fabray, the girl she had so dangerously yet unconscionably fallen head over heels for, had ascended to her window, and told her to her face that she was beautiful.

''And why do you think Juliet decided to defy her family's wishes and pursue Romeo?''

Quinn had leaned in, and all at once Rachel's brain had erupted with pulses of bright neon flashing lights, thundering and roaring louder and louder like the sky had ripped open, and her heart had caved in completely. Quinn was kissing her, and she? She was an absolute goner.

''I think she chose to follow her heart, and not her head.''

Finn's deep voice glided across her thoughts briefly, and she noticed him glancing her way. But the Romeo Rachel had in mind was someone completely different. Somebody, who Hiram would never accept because of all the horrid things she had done to Rachel in the past.

Couldn't they just let go of it, like she had?

Could they not see how Quinn had changed?

No, they couldn't.

Because when you go through a journey of emotions, it's a special kind of growth that no one can really see. You come out as a different person, but all people see is the same face, the same expressions and mannerisms they've grown so accustomed to. They see the image they've boxed you into, as if you're incapable of moving outside that box, because, that's impossible isn't it?

''Yes Finn, but what was it about Juliet specifically that made her go after the one person she wasn't allowed to have?''

Rachel broke out of her stupor when she noticed, out of the corner of her eye, a hand pressed upon the glass window of the door to the classroom. Her gaze flickered up to see two sparkling hazel eyes watching her, and then lowered to soft, full red lips, and finally down to a slender index finger, which was tracing an invisible heart across the glass.

Rachel felt herself gulp at the intimate gesture, one that her heart would never be ready for yet was always yearning for at the same time.

Not so long ago, she would never have believed it if somebody had told her that there was more to Quinn than a heartless bully whose single goal was to be feared by all those around her.

What made Rachel keep fighting against that image? Why, was she blindly holding onto the hope that the Quinn buried deep inside would suddenly emerge? And why had she risked it all that day in the park in that moment of pure happy madness?

She felt her lips curve into an impossibly wide smile.

The bell rang loudly and Rachel shook her head, because it was all too good to be true.

Nothing could take this feeling away from her. Not Hiram, not the rest of McKinley High, not-

''Hey.''

Finn, with a mildly annoyed expression on his face and his arm tightly on hers. His lips parted slowly, betraying his impatience to speak.

''Look, Rach. I'm sorry about the way I reacted the other day. It was really dumb, and I never should have been like that about your gay dads.''

Rachel clenched her fists.

''They're my dads, Finn.''

He looked away for a moment, and resumed as if he hadn't been corrected.

"So, if you're still going to Puck's masquerade ball, I thought it'd be nice if you came as my uh, date."

He tapped his large fingers on the desk, sweat dressing his palm. Was he nervous? He should be. He had stood in the corridor that day, egging on the fight, aggravating it, without even thinking, and not even having the decency to go and ask if Quinn was ok after everyone found out her biggest secret.

But now, Quinn finally had her knight in shining armour, who would protect her, and love her, and keep her precious, precious heart safe from idiots like him.

"No. I will not go as your date."

Rachel stood up to leave but she felt Finn's hand pull her back.

"Please?"

He kept searching her face for the tiniest flinch, anything that would signal her approval.

"No."

Suddenly he roughly let go of her hand, and his expression morphed into a scowl.

"I saw the way you were looking at her through the door, Rachel."

His tone was heavy and accusatory. Rachel felt her body grow hot.

"And I saw what she did."

Finn glared at her.

"It's wrong, Rachel. It's...disgusting."

Most of the class had filtered out of the room, and Finn had managed to keep his voice to a minimal hiss. But Rachel couldn't bear to keep her silence for much longer. One more insult and she would crack.

"Do you..." His face scrunched up in revulsion, "Do you have a thing for my ex-girlfriend? My gay, ex-girlfri-"

"SHUT UP! Shut up, Finn. Don't you dare speak about her that way! She has a name, and it's Quinn, Quinn Fabray! And she's so much more than just your 'gay ex-girlfriend'! She's a human being, and there is absolutely not a single iota of her that is disgusting! She's the most beautiful person I know, but she's been so horribly repressed that she couldn't even try to be herself! And you know what? Maybe I do have a 'thing' for her. Maybe, maybe I even love her."

Finn's eyes bulged a little but he forced a smile.

"Rach, I'm sorry to say this, but I think she's brainwashed you. You're in some dreamland and you haven't woken up yet but that's ok. She destroyed your life. Destroyed it. Aren't you forgetting that? You can't love someone like that. But you can love me. Come on, why don't you make things easier for yourself for once? You're always trying too hard to be the best at everything, but with me you can be yourself. We could start off slow, Rach, I'm not going anywhere. And I'm not gonna turn you into a deviant like she i-"

"FINN!"

Her voice had become impossibly louder and her face was flushed bright red.

"Firstly, please stop speaking, because every time you do, you disregard every single previous conversation we've ever had and try to start afresh without taking my feelings into consideration at all. Secondly, always trying too hard is myself. That's how I was born, I was made for that stage Finn, and if you don't like ambition well I'm warning you that I am the most goal driven girl you'll ever meet. Thirdly, you have no right whatsoever to instruct me on who I can love or why, because you obviously have no idea when to recognise that people are actually happy without you interfering in their personal life! I don't care how many times you try to convince me that you like me, because you don't, Finn. Do you even know what the teacher was asking you in class earlier?"

"I-"

"She was asking you what made Juliet go after the person she wasn't allowed to have. And let me tell you, she wasn't talking about Romeo having a pretty face, or a toned body. Juliet didn't only follow her heart, she saw in Romeo what nobody else could see. She saw his soul."

"Rach, that's imposs-"

"I'm in love with her. I'm in love with Quinn."

She breathed out heavily, surprised at her own confidence and the sudden admission. Finn's posture slumped slightly, and he spoke with a tremble in his voice.

"Rach...if you don't say yes to me, bad things will happen to her."

"What do you mean?"

She watched his pupils shrink.

"Say yes and you'll never have to find out. Let me take you to Puck's."

Rachel felt her body clam up.

"Finn?"

"Yeah, Rach?"

"Why can't you just accept the fact that I love her and not you? Why can't you just move on?"

There was a silence, and she heard Finn breathe out slowly.

"Alright. If that's how you want it."

She shifted slightly from where she stood and watched him with new eyes. Perhaps she had been wrong about him after all.

"I guess I'll see you at the party then, Berry."

Berry?

Rachel watched in muted shock as Finn walked over to the door, which opened with a creak and was held held in place by Karofsky, who shot her a wicked smile.

Quinn was in trouble.


	28. Chapter 28: When You Say Nothing At All

For the first time since she was a little girl playing hide and seek, Quinn felt happy. And not just the ordinary happy you feel because you get an 'A' on your maths test. No. She was pretty sure that pacing around your room not knowing what to do, being unable to eat or drink because you just wanna burst with so many feelings cooped up inside your chest...but you didn't know how to say them out loud, and trying hard to stop thinking about that one beautiful person who was doing it all to you-but failing miserably- and loving it, was a sign of madness.

Either that or this was love. Real, true, gut-wrenching, mind-blowing, heart-warming, completely addictive, unstoppable, insatiable and undeniable love. And she was the happiest she had been in her whole life, because she'd been given the chance to feel it. It was happening and it was happening to her. She reminded herself to thank God for this at some stage, because she finally understood what they meant when they talked about miracles in church.

She stared at her reflection in the mirror and nervously played with the flower pin attached to her dress, took a big gulp, and quietly exited from her bedroom door.

* * *

Only two hours remained until Puck's party but the only sensation that gripped Rachel was uncertainty. She collapsed onto her bed sheets wiping the sweat from her forehead, and closed her eyes, letting her mind trail back to yesterday.

Quinn had found her at the end of the day, and wrapped her hands over her eyes, so she was being blindly lead down the corridor. She could hear her giggling nervously, her hands shaking slightly as they finally reached a door, opened it and went inside. She felt Quinn's hands slowly falling away from her face.

''Open your eyes, Red Riding Hood.''

They were in the girls' bathroom. Rachel sighed, and all the past memories they'd shared within those cold tiled walls completely flooded her brain.

There was the time that Quinn had first apologised to her, and then the time she had told Quinn she dreamed of her. She wished she hadn't denied that now. Rachel saw every facet of their interaction with a new light now, and boy did it feel very different seeing it that way.

Then Quinn had admitted she sang 'Killing Me Softly' about her, and not Finn.

The last time she and Quinn had been here was when Quinn had told her to never let her go. She felt herself grin shyly at the thought.

''Rachel, there's something I want to give you.''

Rachel lifted her eyes from Quinn's hands, which were circling over her wrists gently, and stared into hazel. She was beaming with happiness, blissfully unaware of and unburdened by the knowledge Rachel had. Was that why, even for a fleeting moment, that she felt like Quinn's joy wouldn't last? That something bad was going to come and take it away from her? Somehow this all felt wrong. And it felt wrong, because Rachel just couldn't watch her open up like this when Finn's words kept replaying over and over again in her head.

"Quinn I need to-"

Quinn hushed her by placing a soft finger over her mouth, and chuckled quietly.

''Chatterbox. I want you to take this and read it. Whenever you have time. I know you've got a busy schedule outside school but...just read it ok?''

Rachel Berry was no coward, but if Quinn knew about the verbal soccer match she'd had with her dads, and especially what Rachel had seen after class yesterday with Karofsky-no. She had to tell her, even if it scared her. She had to protect her!

"But there's something I-"

"Promise?"

And Quinn looked at her, with those big round imploring eyes and a huge smile that Rachel could never grow tired of.

Why did Rachel suddenly feel like she was going to be missing this? Like Quinn was slipping away from her, despite the fact that she too had promised to never let her go? Could it be, that Finn was right when he said she was in some dreamland, and their bubble of happiness was going to burst and die?

She nodded, burying the doubt away in the deepest pit of her heart, and watched Quinn's face light up like brightest star in the sky before she leaned in to kiss her on the cheek.

* * *

Quinn walked down the stairs, one step at a time so she wouldn't fall head over in heels. Not in love, she thought to herself amusedly, because it was already too late for that. God, she loved that girl. But God, she wasn't used to wearing shoes that made her feel like a basketball player! She reasoned with herself that she was, after all, going to a party. And she had to look presentable. Because Rachel would be there and-

''Quinnie, where are you going? You look absolutely lovely!''

Judy stared up at her in astonishment, her eyes taking in every inch of her billowing white dress.

''A boy at school is having a party and...my friends and I were invited, mom.''

Judy smiled with a wink.

''Going along to see Finn, Miss Fabray?''

Quinn swallowed.

''Y-Yeah, something like that.''

''Well dear, if you need a lift let us know, won't you?''

''Of course, mom. But I'll be fine by myself.''

She had reached the front door but paused to hear her mother's final words:

''Alright Quinnie, I just get the feeling you've been distant lately-like you're holding back about something. I can see it in your eyes. You do know you can always tell us anything, right?''

Quinn remained silent, and Judy took that as a confirmation.

''Don't stay out too late, remember we still have church on. I think tomorrow's service is about cleansing onself of...impurities and-''

''Impurities? You mean disease? Judy don't go tiptoeing around that damned issue in my house. I don't even know why they're discussing it. It's vile.'' Russell took another swig out of his bottle and turned to Quinn. ''Have a good night, Quinn. And thank God you're not one of them.''

Thank God?

Quinn shut the door without looking back.

* * *

Rachel had difficulty falling asleep that night, and when she did, she dreamt that it was so dark that you couldn't see a thing, except for a blinding light up ahead in the distance. Then, that same car that always parked opposite her house was there, and the faint music was growing louder and louder. It sounded so peaceful, so much like...She stepped towards it, like she was getting pulled in by its gravity. Like every step she took closer made her heart swell a bit more with unexpected joy. But then out of nowhere, a loud thundering noise snapped her out of her spell. Suddenly she could hear a familiar voice rippling through the air towards her, coming from the light up the road and cracks began to form on the car windows.

''I forbid you!''

Rachel shivered and fell against the side of the car, desperately trying to mute out the sound. The light was moving closer, getting louder and faster-

''She doesn't deserve your goodness!''

''No Daddy, stop it!''

''It's disgusting!''

''D-Daddy?''

Rachel placed a hand over her eyes, blocking out the intense light and noise that kept drawing nearer and nearer to her and the car. She clung to the car door, feeling like she had to protect it at all costs.

''Bad things will happen to her, Rachel!''

''No! I'm not allowing it!''

Her body jerked upward and she panted heavily, sweat streaming down her face. Rachel's pulse raced madly and she purposely calmed her raspy breaths because, for a fraction of a second, she'd felt like her nightmare was real. She felt like she had lost Quinn.

* * *

Carefully settling down upon the seat, she handed a few notes to the taxi driver and told him the Puckerman's address. The engine grumbled lowly and soon they were out on the main street, and Quinn couldn't stop smiling.

She kept thinking back to yesterday, when she had finally gathered the courage to give her letter to Rachel. As if by some stroke of sheer luck, she had uncovered one final letter amongst the cobwebs beneath her bed. It had survived, just like her love. It wasn't perfect. No, it was far from it. One of the edges was torn off so the page didn't even completely make an A4 size. Who knew what happened to that edge. And the writing? Well it was hopelessly messy and rushed, just like her thoughts had been at the time.

She had written it on that day, only moments before Judy had asked her whether she had a crush on someone. That day brought back painful memories for Quinn whenever she allowed her mind to wander, but now, the only thing she could see was hope. Something within her had changed. She felt like she was on top of the world because of one girl, the girl who finally loved her back-Rachel Berry. And nothing could break them. Even if their love was as delicate as paper cranes flying in the night.

* * *

It was all too soon. Saturday night had just crept up on her, and now she was stuck. So Rachel just continued to keep her eyes shut, willing herself to come to a decision about whether she should go to Puck's, or just cancel.

Cancelling would be easy.

Cancelling, would be the right thing to do by her Daddy.

Her eyelids fluttered open and dragged over to her bedside table, fixating on a smoothened out piece of paper. A small letter, actually. Unconsciously her hand reached out for it, and she heard herself sigh when she read the words out loud.

''You are beautiful.''

It was 'nothing important', Quinn had said. But Rachel had been searching for that note, desparate to be reunited with it, so she ignored her words. She had picked it up from the rubbish that day, and took great care not to lose it ever again. Discovering that Quinn had been her secret admirer had been a shock, but not the kind she expected. It didn't make her gasp or cry out 'Eureka!' and, strangely, overhearing her conversation with Santana hadn't had that effect either.

Instead, hearing Quinn pour out the truth, her heart and soul, had made Rachel want to just throw her arms around her and protect her. At the time, she didn't question it, and just put it down to being a friend to someone in need. She was just doing what her dads had told her to do, because love was the only thing that could set things right.

But Rachel could see now that the way she cared for Quinn was special. And if any harm came to her-Rachel couldn't bear to finish the thought.

What if Karofsky was waiting for her, ready to hurt her again?

And Finn, surely he wasn't so revengeful as to condone that kind of behavior?

Oh God, had she made a mistake by not telling her?

She slid off her bed and began to pace around the room, growing more anxious as each minute went by.

Tick.

She couldn't go. Hiram would never forgive her for hurting him like that. Her Daddy loved her and he really was just looking out for her best interests. He...didn't want her to end up getting hurt like he did. But...

Tock.

She had to go. Quinn might get hurt because of that monster, Karofsky! And it would be all her fault for keeping her mouth shut. He was the real monster, not Quinn, Rachel thought wildly and wished that her logic could be telepathically transferred to her Daddy. She wished, so very much, that he could understand like Leroy could.

Tick.

But if she did go, and Hiram found out, she'd have to move schools, and that meant never seeing Quinn again. Ever. And that scared her more than she could handle.

Tock.

She loved Quinn, and Quinn loved her. They hadn't said it to each other officially, but Rachel could feel it oozing out from her, and she was so sure that Quinn knew she felt exactly the same. She would do anything for Quinn, and Quinn would-

Wait.

Rachel dropped to her knees and her hands found her schoolbag and roughly pulled down the zipper, so she could sift through all her books until she found it. When she did, she yanked it out carefully, and unfolded it.

"Just read it, ok?"

Quinn had said. Because that was all Quinn ever needed to say. It was like, she could tell a whole story with her eyes and not have to say it out loud. And Rachel would understand it all. This was Quinn's gift to her. She stared down at the letter, which seemed to be a poem of some sort. She smiled when she noticed an edge torn off, and instinctively understood what to do with it. She carried the letter back over to her bed where the smaller letter was. When she placed it in the corner, the pieces matched perfectly. The page was whole, just like it was always meant to be. Just like feelings are always meant to be, because feelings were never stupid. Now they were whole at last, and so was Quinn, and because of that Rachel felt like she could read the poem as it was always intended to be read. So that's what she did. She let herself get lost in Quinn's words, and she read.

_One day Rachel Berry, I'm going to be brave enough to give this to you. And I'm going to give it because poetry is beautiful, and feelings are beautiful. You are beautiful._

_And you couldn't be more beautiful than when you're dressed in your beautiful argyle sweaters, singing your beautiful heart out in glee._

_This will be for you, always._

_Paper Cranes, by Lucy Quinn Fabray_

_When your thoughts are all gone, at the end of the day, where do they go?_

_Do they just go to sleep, like you do?_

_Or do they fold up into paper cranes, and fly away into the night-_

_-like mine?_

_When you close your eyes, to go to sleep, do you think of me?_

_Do I visit you in your dreams?_

_Do I lie on your bed, next to you, just staring endlessly into your eyes, trying to figure out how you make my heart skip a beat?_

_Do I nervously reach out for your hand, just to feel your knuckles brush against mine, so I can say I've officially touched you?_

_Do you kiss me, making me feel you from deep inside, setting my mind on fire over and over again as you always pull me closer, because I taste like candy, and you love the taste so much that you can never get enough?_

_Do you want me like you can't breathe without me, like I'm your oxygen and you're my fire?_

_Do I hold you tight, and do you whisper my name into my ear, so quietly that it barely registers as a shiver, but my heart knows it was real, because it came from you?_

_Do you whisper it over and over, as our bodies press together in the humid night, and I shudder in your arms safe and sound, with my eyes closed so peacefully, because all I want to do is to feel you, to have you close to me so I can keep smiling, so you can melt away all the ice that keeps imprisoning my heart, and never setting it free?_

_Do you look at me as you feel my hands on you, just caressing you slowly, just barely touching, just loving you, as they smooth all over your body until I make you mine, until you scream out loud because there's just so much too feel but we're only human, and we can never feel enough?_

_Do you stay with me until the morning light, letting my lips ghost over yours, letting me cover you with soft fluttering kisses that make you crazy, that make you want me, almost as much as I want you?_

_When my thoughts are all gone at the end of the day, they fold up into paper cranes and fly away into the night._

_And they look for you._

_P.S. Musicals aren't trashy. They're actually kind of cool, just like you._

Rachel felt her entire body tremor, like a cold wind had somehow gushed through her closed window, and then she had come back down to earth again. A few minutes later, she was dressed, and fit her mask on to hide the tears that kept erupting from behind her eyes. She unlocked the window and was about to step outside into the warm night when she heard a soft voice calling from behind her.

"Stop! In the name of love!"

Rachel smiled and turned to face Leroy.

"Looks like my baby girl is all grown up."

He smiled back at her, a mutual understanding passing between them.

"Well come on, what are you waiting for? Romeo to come and pick you up in his fancy limousine?"

Rachel laughed and felt her tears fall, but they were happy tears. She climbed outside freely, relieved that she had her Dad on her side. Hopefully, one day soon, it would be her Daddy too. And hopefully, Quinn didn't have any more poetry like that up her sleeve. Because what she had just read, in complete and utter silence, had absolutely wrecked her.

And she would never, ever, ever let anybody wreck her Quinn again.


	29. Chapter 29: A Time For Us

By the time Rachel had arrived at Puck's house, everything was pitch black except for the lights streaming out from the party. The soothing violin music belied the tension erupting just on the other side of the door, but for Rachel it was almost palpable. As she ran towards the front door, she briefly wondered whether this was how Juliet felt the first time she met Romeo. Fearful. Worried about the repercussions of loving someone who was considered an enemy. Constantly preoccupied about whether any harm would come to him, because she loved him so much. Her mask felt cold in her hands as she pulled it on, slipping into her disguise. She quickly made her way down the corridor, the violin growing louder and louder, until she finally reached the main hall.

Hundreds of faces, all covered with extravagant masks were bobbing up and down, velvet dresses and satin capes swirling around as couples danced to the music, seemingly lost in another world, lost in each other. Rachel smiled despite her anxiety. Who knew that Puck could organise something so fancy?

''May I have this dance, your lordship?''

Rachel's attention snapped away from the crowd at the familiar high pitch voice.

''Kurt?'' She guessed. ''It's me!''

And she lowered her mask slightly so he could see her face properly.

''Oh my, pardon me, m'lady, it's just that your suit is a little too convincing. And that pirate hat, it's certainly doing a great job of hiding your hair. Very handsome.''

Rachel chuckled and lifted her mask back into position.

''Then it looks like my plan's working. Where's Blaine?''

''Oh, he went to get some punch from the kitchen with Quinn.'' He replied offhandedly, failing to see Rachel's eyes widening beneath the mask. ''So, what's this plan about?''

''I'm sorry Kurt, but I have to go. There's someone that I need to see.''

''Someone?''

But Rachel was already weaving her way through the crowd trying to locate the kitchen. If Quinn was with Blaine then Karofsky hadn't gotten to her first, and she was still safe. Perhaps Rachel had overreacted when Finn threatened her in the classroom the other day, and she was wrong to assume he had conspired with Karofsky to hurt Quinn. Still, she couldn't rest until she saw Quinn with her own eyes, so she quickened her pace.

''San, San! Look at that guy over there!''

''Which one, Britt?''

''That guy with the silky white shirt and the hat! Isn't he charming?''

''B, that looks like a perverted Japanese buisness man. Wait. Isn't that the dwar-I mean, Ra-chel?''

Rachel was too busy to stop and listen to the rest of Santana's unique assessment on her attire for the evening. She had just located the kitchen and ran inside, expecting to find Quinn and Blaine.

Instead, she only found one of them.

''Good evening, sir. What can I do for you?''

Rachel's heart started beating faster. Quinn wasn't here. But at the same time, she couldn't be too far away.

''Care for a drink?''

''I'm sorry Blaine, but could you tell me where Quinn is? It's imperative that I see her at once.''

Blaine raised his eyebrows and smiled.

''Rachel? I didn't recognise you in that suit. You look very nice, by the way. I believe Quinn said she went outside to the balcony to 'admire the stars'.'' He said, winking. ''She looks very nice tonight too, but I think she's waiting for the right person to tell her that.''

Rachel sighed in relief and placed her hand on Blaine's shoulder.

''Thank you, then I better be going.''

''Oh, one more thing, you might have a little competition.''

Rachel's face fell just a little, but not as much as it did when she heard Blaine's next few words.

''I saw Karofsky following her.''

When her arm dropped off from his shoulder, Blaine sensed the sudden shift in mood.

''Rachel? Is there something wrong?''

''I need to go now. Quinn's in trouble.''

She spun around frantically, pushing past the people huddled around the doorway and ignored their looks of protest, running so fast her hair came loose and dangled across her shoulders and cascaded down her back. Straight ahead there was a large glass double door, and behind it she could see two dark figures moving about. She tensed internally, her body beginning to lose control.

''Rachel.''

A large hand gently enveloped her arm and pulled her around.

''Rachel Berry. I'm sorry about what I said to you yesterday. It was cruel and thoughtless, and I know it hurt you a lot. But I want you to understand something.''

Finn. Rachel looked up into his eyes, her heart pounding nervously at what might be happening to Quinn outside. He leaned in closer, looking at her sincerely.

''I'm just a boy, standing in front of a girl, asking her to love him. I've made a lot of mistakes, and I'm not perfect, but could you give me one last chance?''

He grabbed onto her other arm, willing her to keep looking back at him. Rachel sighed.

''Finn, I need to be somewhere.''

His expression hardened.

''Rach, I'm not such a bad guy, you know? I had to ask Karofsky to keep Quinn outside just so I could get the chance to talk to you. Lately, all you do is spend time with her, and when you told me you...l-loved her I-''

''Finn! Please, I think Quinn could be in danger!''

''See what I mean? Quinn this, Quinn that. Geez Rachel, why are always so drawn to such problematic people? She doesn't need saving, you do, and I want to be the one to-''

''FINN.'' She said, cutting him off and breathing heavily, ''Did you know that Karofsky hurt her? Quinn wouldn't say, but your 'friend' physically hurt her. Does that make you feel ok knowing he's out there with her again?''

Finn's face paled.

''What?''

''Let go of my arms Finn, maybe we can help her before it's too late.''

''You're joking.'' He said slowly, grip loosening. ''I just told him to slushie her.''

Rachel shook her head.

''Then you obviously don't know Karofsky.''

And she began to run again, not waiting to see Finn bury his face in his hands and begin to cry, not waiting to hear him mumble 'I'm sorry' over and over again. There was no time for that. She heard angry voices as she lunged for the door.

''Hmm? Not so brave without Schue here, are you Quinnie? Are you? You know, all I gotta do is push the send button and my mates will come and bash you. Maybe then you'll get a clue and stop going after Gayberry.''

Rachel turned the knob, fingers slipping under pressure. It was locked.

''So. What's it to be? Are you gonna leave her alone, or do I have to make you?''

Quinn fought back her tears. She had dressed immaculately this evening, and had never anticipated Karofsky rearing his ugly head like this. Still, there was something different in the air tonight. The first time he had bullied her, she was fresh from the public humiliation of everybody finding out her best kept secret. It had left her exposed. She was afraid. So afraid of what people would think of her, and her suspicions were confirmed when nearly everybody started treating her differently. Inferior. Everybody but Rachel, Santana and Brittany. The second time Karofsky cornered her, he had caught her off guard in the corridor. She was vulnerable. Still afraid of other people's opinions. Still trying to convince herself to give up Rachel, because she didn't deserve her.

But now, she could feel this strange sensation swirling inside her. Like that day in the park, she felt invincible. Rachel had kissed her for the first time that day, and it wasn't just a dream. She had kissed her back to life, just like Wendy kissed Peter Pan on the deck of the Jolly Roger. She felt her lips cuve into a smile unconsciously at the thought, and then, she was facing Karofsky head on.

''Listen here, Karofsky.''

The sound of her own voice amazed her. It sounded determined, and strong. It sounded like the real Quinn.

''I know you think you've got these grand plans about what you're gonna do with me so you can keep putting me down, but I think it's time you left me alone, because I'm not doing anything you say anymore.''

He looked puzzled for a second, shocked at Quinn's reply.

''What did you say? You want me to press send, don't you?''

Quinn's smile turned into a smirk.

''I've finally figured you out, Karofsky. All this time I've been struggling with myself and you took advantage of that. Do you know why? Because somewhere deep inside, you're just a scared little boy who's too afraid to admit that he's just like me.''

She watched him scowl at the last sentence, but stood her ground.

''Shut up Quinnie, or I press-''

Quinn inched closer, cutting him off and pushing him forward roughly with her palms.

''My name's Quinn! Not Quinnie. And I want you to remember that. Only my mother calls me Quinnie, and you, are not my mother. I'm sick and I'm tired of being your little puppet, Karofsky. Once upon a time, I was no better than you. I was you. I was bullying a girl who didn't deserve it because of my own insecurites. But I changed because she believed in me when nobody else didn't. I'm not the loser here, and I'm not a waste. You are. So why don't you man up and stop picking on me, because really, you're picking on yourself!''

Karofsky growled angrily and punched send, raising his hand to slap Quinn. She stepped closer, not caring that he was trembling with rage, and tried to catch her breath. Nothing could stop her now. All these words had been pent up inside for so long, and one by one they poured out.

''Stay away from me, or I tell Sylvester you and your dim wit buddies tried to rape me.''

She breathed, and poked him in the chest, unafraid.

''She'll never believe you, you know?'' He said, a smug expression on his face,''She'll never believe the word of some loser who thinks it's ok to be gay over mine. I think I'm going to slap you now.''

Quinn didn't even flinch. She kept staring straight back at him until the door just beside them began to unlock, and both of them turned to look at it.

''Well, looks like my mates will be doing the job for me.'' Karofsky jeered as he lowered his hand, but through the door jumped Rachel, who promptly went up to Karofsky and slapped him hard in the face.

''Don't you dare touch her again! Stay away or I'll report you to the principal!''

At that moment, someone dressed like a DJ casually walked through the door, and removed their mask with purpose.

''Coach Sylvester?''

Quinn heard herself say in astonishment, as she watched her stride over to Karofsky and grip his arm tightly.

''Why if it isn't the ringleader of the hormone enraged minons from the locker room.'' She said, frowning at Karofsky. ''Take a good look at this face, girls, because it's the face of a scoundrel who's about to face the academic board and a possible expulsion.''

Suddenly Karofsky's free hand shot up over his head and he pulled at his hair in anguish.

''Expulsion? B-But we've got graduation in one month! You...you can't do this to me!''

''Save it for the academic board, blubberguts.''

''My parents...they'll kill me if I'm expelled!''

''I missed the part where that's my problem. I gave you and your minions a detention and threatened to suspend you for a week, but obviously I made a grave mistake in my judgement.'''

Sylvester's steely expression was unwavering, but it softened when she turned to face Quinn and Rachel.

''Quinn. As head cheerio, you've let me down. You should have told me exactly what had transipred between you and these ruffians on that very day, because then Santana wouldn't have felt the need to ask me to disguise myself as a flamboyant disc jockey in order to attend this pitiful social gathering while doubling as a bouncer. But more importantly, we could have done something to help you sooner. For that reason, you're no longer head cheerio. Hopefully Santana doesn't get another boob job because that means I'll be forced to promote Brittany to head cheerleader.''

Quinn nodded, sad at the news that she had lost her title, but coming out of the whole Karofsky ordeal unscathed meant so much more to her than that right now.

''Berry. You never cease to amaze me. From kleenex ambassador to giant-slaying midget. You really are a David in disguise. Good job.''

When the rest of Karofsky's friends walked through the door, their eyes popped and they jumped back in fright.

''Ah. Perfect timing. You can run, but you can't hide.''

Sue smiled, dragging Karofsky along with her, and the rest of the boys bolted when she approached.

And then, finally, there were two.

Quinn smiled when she realised that Rachel was in fact wearing some black tights and a flowy shirt, which were topped off with a swashbuckling hat.

''You idiot!''

Rachel yelled, before throwing her arms around Quinn and squeezing hard.

''You idiot. I was so scared something bad would happen to you again. If that jerk ever lays a finger on you again, I swear I'll get him, and I don't even care if I'm a dwarf in comparison. Last night...last night I dreamt that I lost you Quinn,'' She whispered into her shoulder between sobs, ''And I can't lose you. Not after we promised to never let each other go. Not after all the tears and pain...''

She shifted her face so she was looking right into Quinn's eyes. They shone in the dim glow of moonlight that illuminated their skin, and her lips were curved upward in a smile.

''You dreamt of me?''

Realising what she had just revealed, Rachel's face turned a faint shade of red, and she released her hold on Quinn.

''You were very impressive out here tonight. I'm glad the real Quinn's back.''

She said nervously, staring at the floor between them.

There was a soft hand running along the length of her sleeve, and then she felt her hand being grasped gently.

''Did you really dream of me, Rachel?''

Her voice was tender, and it enticed Rachel to follow the sound all the way up to her eyes, sparkling full of hope.

''You look v-very nice tonight, Quinn.''

Quinn's other hand took hold of Rachel's remaining arm and slid both her hands up behind her neck, resting them on her back.

''Rachel?''

She pressed, blushing now as well.

''A-And that poem you wrote, it was rather beautiful...''

''Rachel!''

''Perhaps I may...sometimes have instances at night where I...just so happen to have spent a great deal of time thinking about you a-and...''

''Rachel.''

Quinn said, leaning in so their foreheads were touching. Still looking down, Rachel finally said the words Quinn wanted to hear.

''Yes. I dreamt of you.''

She peeked upwards momentarily and saw Quinn beaming. It made her heartbeat accelerate, and within seconds she felt that familar 'fever' that always seemed to manifest itself around Quinn. She couldn't help it when her smile was suddenly mirroring Quinn's.

''You know...'' Rachel began shyly, doing her best to calm her nerves, ''You can kiss me if you want to.''

She bit down on her lip hard when she heard Quinn's reply.

''I want to.''


	30. Chapter 30: Kissing You

**A/N: Greetings, readers/reviewers and fellow fanfiction aficionadas/os;) If you've taken the time to stop by and have a squiz, thank you! Every single person's opinion (any aliens here?^^), including the snazzy guest reviewers, are PRECIOUS and are guiding the story along:-) What do you all think about Quinn/Rachel being together? For the faint of heart, be warned, as there may be a few (quite major) cliffhangers up ahead! We're in the final stretch now, so hold on tight SMxo**

* * *

The first time you kiss someone, it's supposed to be glorious. Fireworks are meant to be exploding all around you as your heart beats to the tune of a marching band. The sun should come out to shine away all the rain, and the someone that you kiss has to be someone that you love.

Rachel Berry had already had her first kiss many years ago, and if she was being honest, it was quite far from spectacular. No one had even thought to bring fireworks to Puck's party, so there was dead silence bar the music. It didn't look like the sun was about to shine anytime soon, seeing as it was about 11pm, and her heart wasn't even drumming like a marching band.

No. It was blasting out into space like a rocket on a mission, and it felt like the most spectacular non-first kiss ever, because she was kissing the girl she loved, and she was kissing her back.

Rachel trembled with anticipation as Quinn's beaming face came closer, her lips tingling at the contact. Quinn's mouth was impossibly soft, and everytime Rachel tried to pull away for a breath of air Quinn smiled and pulled her back in, kissing her tenderly on her cheeks, on her forehead, on her nose, and then finally on her lips again. Rachel sighed into her, allowing Quinn to hold her like that, because being in Quinn's arms felt so good and so comforting.

''You kiss by the book...''

Rachel managed to say with heated breaths, before Quinn grabbed her by the waist and hoisted her into the air, spinning around with her.

''Put me down! That's not fair! I'm supposed to be doing that to you!''

Rachel screamed from above.

''What, you think you get to push me round just because I'm wearning a dress? Dead wrong, Romeo.''

Quinn said, laughing as she put Rachel back down, and poked her on the nose.

''In fact, don't you find it a little odd that I'm dressed as Juliet and I'm taller than you? God Quinn, talk about lowering your standards. Literally.''

Rachel pouted furiously and without a second thought, she dug her fingernails into Quinn's sides. And began tickling her.

''N-N-N-Nooooo! St-stop that! I hate it when people tickle me! Rachel! Rachel Berry, if you know what's good for you you'll stop right now!''

Rachel grinned wickedly and stole a kiss before she bowed, taking off her hat and flourishing it before her. It was hard not to laugh at Quinn, whose hair had become slightly messed up due to the unexpected tickling onslaught. Her cheeks were stained red from laughter, and she glared at Rachel, breathing heavily.

''I'm gonna give you to the count of three, Miss Berry, before I chase you down and attack you. I'm warning you in advance, that young girls are the second favourite meal of big bad wolves.''

Quinn was examining her nails distractedly. Rachel knew she was joking.

''One.''

''You're not serious, are you Quinn?'' Rachel asked, the barest hint of panic colouring her voice. ''You're not going to chase me in front of all those merry guests in the ballroom over yonder?''

''Two.''

''Quinn! I'm sorry! I didn't realise you took tickling so seriously! Please, I'll make it up to you. Here, you can tickle me back.''

Rachel said and stood before her, holding her arms out expectantly. Quinn stared at her long and hard with the most serious expression she had ever seen. Was she actually considering her offer? She breathed out with relief.

''Well good, I'm glad you decided to-''

''Three.''

In a split-second, Quinn was wearing the same wicked grin Rachel was sporting before, and she practically lunged for her. Rachel yelped and yanked her arms away just in time, and sprinted through the glass doors into the hall.

''Help! Kurt! Blaine! Anyone! She's mad!''

Rachel kept running, but she was growing weaker, falling victim to that awful tendency to slow down when laughing too hard, which really would be quite awful if the situation was actually a serious one.

''I knew it! The perverted businessman, it was her!''

Rachel jumped through the gap between Santana and Brittany, laughing at their shocked faces, and snapped her head back over her shoulder. Quinn was hot on her trail, sifting through any couples who weren't dancing close together enough.

''Oh no, Rachel, your hair is all lose!''

She brushed past Kurt next, who watched on despondently, probably lamenting at the fact that she no longer looked like a good lord, and kept running and running until she was out of breath and hit into something hard.

''I'm so sorry...'' She said deliriously, ''I didn't mean to-''

And the rest of her words got stuck in her throat when she saw who was standing in front of her.

''Rachel Barbra Berry. What are you doing?''

Hiram's voice boomed, rivalling even the viloin music still playing in the background.

''Oh hi Mr. Berry,'' Came a voice from behind Rachel, ''Enjoying my masquerade ball? Tried to do it a little bit different this time round.''

Puck, who was dressed as a very dashing knight in armour, looked rather proud of himself. But Rachel knew that once her Daddy was mad, almost nothing could make him un-mad.

''Rachel.'' He continued, ignoring Puck's comment, ''Not only did you not tell me you were going out tonight, but you disobeyed me again to go and see that monster!''

A general hush swept over the partygoers and a very angry Mr. Berry stood pointing a shaky finger at Quinn.

''You stay away from my daughter, alright? You've put her through enough trouble and I'm not letting you hurt her again!''

''Daddy,'' Rachel begged, pulling at his arm, ''Please, just listen to what she has to say, she's really not as bad as y-''

''Silence. You're coming with me, now.''

And he grabbed her arm to lead her out the door.

''No! Please! Just give her a chance!''

Hiram stilled completely and stared at Rachel in disbelief, then briefly at Quinn and the rest of the stunned onlookers before returning his gaze to his daughter.

''Do you love her?''

Rachel nodded, tears welling up in her eyes. Hiram redirected his gaze back to Quinn, the lines around his eyes hardening slightly.

''And you, Quinn, do you love Rachel?''

Almost imperceptibly, Quinn's shocked face gave a very small nod.

Hiram shook his head, looking up to the ceiling.

''Why does history have to repeat itself so often? Alright. I'll make you a deal.''

Quinn watched on with hope, and Rachel just prayed that her Daddy would understand.

''I'll let you spend time with her, but you're gonna have to earn it, Quinn. Prove yourself.''

And with that, Hiram guided Rachel out of the party, where the violin music played on, unnoticed.


End file.
